27/10/2025
October is Domestic Violence awareness month.
It all starts with Coercive control.
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Imagine this:
You finally find the strength to stand up for yourself. You stop accepting the gaslighting, the manipulation, the chaos, the constant fighting that used to feel like “normal.” You finally choose peace over pain, and the person who caused that pain loses control of you.
And that’s when they strike again.
Not with their words this time. Not with their hands. But with something far worse, your child.
It’s a level of cruelty most people can’t comprehend unless they’ve lived it. When someone can no longer control you, they look for the next best thing, something that still hurts you, something that still ties you to them emotionally. For a parent, that “thing” is their child.
The same person who once claimed to love you will now manipulate, twist, and lie to the child you created together. They’ll rewrite history. They’ll paint you as the villain. They’ll feed your child half-truths wrapped in emotional guilt and fear until the innocent heart that once ran to you now hesitates…. confused, torn, and unsure of who to believe.
And what’s worse? You’ll be blamed for reacting to the abuse.
Because you will react, because you’re only human.
You’ll cry. You’ll yell. You’ll beg. You’ll fight to be understood. And they’ll twist every ounce of that emotion into “proof” that you’re unstable or unfit.
It’s the most manipulative tactic there is: parental alienation disguised as concern.
But here’s the truth no one tells you, their goal isn’t to parent. Their goal is to punish. Punish you for walking away. Punish you for healing.
Punish you for daring to live a life that no longer centers around their control.
And yet, even through all of that, you show up.
You still love your child unconditionally.
You still pray for peace in their little heart.
You still hold space for the day they’ll see the truth without you having to say a word.
That’s the kind of strength most people will never understand, the strength it takes to love your child through someone else’s manipulation.
So if you’re a parent in that position right now, please know that you are not weak. You are not crazy. You are not the problem.
You’re a parent fighting a battle you never should’ve been forced into, a war that uses love as a weapon and silence as ammunition.
But keep standing your ground. Keep protecting your peace. Keep choosing love over retaliation. Because one day, your child will see who was really fighting for them… and who was fighting to control them.
And when that day comes, you won’t need to prove anything. The truth will speak for itself.
