24/11/2025
ONLY GET A CHILD WHEN READY
In the African society context, there are always expectations that at a certain age, one should get married and bring forth children. Whenever some kinsmen realized that their son was not gifted with a verbal charm to serenade a damsel, they would make arrangements to ensure he has a wife. Reason being the fundamental reason for the union is procreation. The pressure is so intense on women after staying in marriage for some time and it seems like nothing is happening. Yes. Nothing.
What if it's the arrangement of the couple to have children later, maybe after three or so years?
The adage of bringing forth children because of societal pressure or your mum wants to be a granny is a pedestrian reasoning and myopic reasoning that doesn't hold water in this era.
It's very sickening and narcissistic for parents to put pressure on their children into having children for them to floss around as grandparents before their peers.
Did they experience the same pressure in their marriage? Why pop out a kid you don't love but to please your parents? And by the way, we've those people who aren't wired to bring forth children. Yes. They're comfortable with companionship. Period.
It was quite despicable and backward for the parent who kept on nagging her son who was barely eight months into marriage on assertion that the son and his wife have good jobs and are financially stable to raise kids. Surely? There is more to life than just giving birth.
Her assertions that she will care for the young ones was unrealistic and illogical. Is it a tacit support that we should raise kids and dump them to our parents to watch over them? Naa!
Grandparents can only grandparent children and not parent them. We have those who will insist on grandchildren to tread on the thin line, but most will pamper them in the end compromising their discipline.
Besides, raising a kid isn't a bed of roses to be left for grandparents alone. The common bravado that children come with 'their plates and spoons' no longer holds water. Children come with a bulk of responsibilities. It completely changes one's life. For instance, one can't hang out with buddies the way they used to.
We have these people who whenever they meet their relatives or friends keep on asking why the tummy has not ballooned. They keep nagging how long they've missed to attend a baby shower. What if they've been trying to get one but things don't seem to be working.
Let's leave those in marriage to only have children when ready.
Editor
Colourful Chronicles
Leonard Maero W
Picture source: internet
