The Neurodivergent Psych Student

14/11/2025

👌🖤

13/11/2025

When “We Have Kids Together”
Becomes an Excuse for Control

There’s a particular kind of entitlement that only shows up once you’ve left a narcissist. The belief that they’re still owed access to your life. 5 years on and today mine proved, again, that he’s still watching… still monitoring… still trying to keep a thread tight around a life he no longer belongs to.

He has this habit of saying things like,
“I know what you’re up to [insert something literally ANYONE can read of my very public page],”
Like… wow congrats bud 👍😂 or

“I’m entitled to know — we have kids together.” As if sharing children means he’s perminantly entitled to my inner world. As if co-parenting automatically grants him a backstage pass to my entire existence. (Which he swears he definitely doesn’t care about 🙄)

But here’s the reality he refuses to acknowledge: Sharing children, means you get updates about your children.

That sentence “I’m entitled to know” used to throw me off balance exactly as it was designed to. It’s classic coercive control disguised as parental concern. A way of saying “Stay small. Stay explainable. Stay where I can see you.”

And for a long time, I did.
I over-explained.
I justified.
I tried to keep the peace.
I let someone else define what was “acceptable” for me to feel, say, or do.

But now?
Now it just sounds desperate. Like someone clinging to a role he doesn’t hold anymore.

He can claim he’s “entitled” all he wants — he isn’t entitled to me.
He isn’t entitled to my routines, my thoughts, my movements, or my healing.
He isn’t entitled to the updates that soothe his insecurity.
He isn’t entitled to the illusion of power he had when I was still living in survival mode.

He’s watching someone he can’t intimidate anymore.
Someone he can’t silence. Someone who doesn’t jump when he pulls the old strings. What used to feel threatening now feels… clarifying. He’s stuck in the chapter where he still mattered. I’m writing entirely new ones. And if you’ve ever had an ex weaponise the phrase,

“We share kids” as a way of keeping tabs on you — just know this:

Co-parenting isn’t an excuse for control.
It isn’t a doorway back into your personal life.
It isn’t a justification for monitoring or entitlement.

Your life outside parenting is yours.
Your peace is yours.
Your healing is yours.
And anyone watching from the sidelines is just that:
a spectator, not a participant.

🖤 Thank you for letting me share these quieter truths here. This space lets me unpack things I used to swallow whole.

12/11/2025

Be so nice to find a doctor who doesn’t loose interest before actually helping me figure out what’s wrong with me 🙃

12/11/2025

Chronic illness asks you to grieve in slow motion.
Not one big loss you can name and move through but thousands of tiny ones that blend into the everyday.

Every cancelled plan, every half-finished project, every “maybe next week” that quietly becomes never. You lose versions of yourself slowly, the one who could wake up and just go, the one who didn’t have to plan rest like logistics, the one who didn’t have to calculate the cost of joy.

And yet, you keep moving.

You learn to find beauty in smaller things, meaning in what’s left. It’s not a pity story, it’s just the truth of living in a body that keeps changing the rules and still finding ways to adapt.

That’s resilience people don’t always recognise… kind that doesn’t roar, it just endures. 🖤

11/11/2025

🖤❤️‍🩹

You can’t heal in the same environment that broke you, especially when that environment refuses to admit it was ever toxic or harmful.

It was a hard lesson to learn. We have got this 🫶🏼💜

11/11/2025

Same TJD Poetry, same 🖤

11/11/2025

Worth checking out 🖤

FREE WEBINAR!

There is literally no one that help us to help our children, or ourselves.

Just because I am Autistic it doesn’t mean that my anxiety is irreparable.

It doesn’t mean that I should go without support, recognition, understanding.

It doesn’t mean I should suffer indefinitely.

It doesn’t mean that every single thing I am anxious about is untreatable.

I am Autistic. So naturally, I have a higher baseline of anxiety than a neuronormative human, it means that I have anxiety related to being Autistic, sure.

But that doesn’t mean you can write me off.

I am hosting this webinar for free. And I am going to create further education on how you can help an Autistic person with their anxiety.

I’m going to show you how to bring that baseline down to enable periods of rest and recovery.

We deserve a way forward to.

We deserve someone to listen, to understand, to support, to move forwards, and we are not less.

This session is going to be interactive. There will be breakouts, presentations, questions, and before Christmas you’ll have access to a two hour recording full of advice, practical tips, explanations ans real life examples.

Let’s do this!!! Wanna join? Show me your 🩷’s! 🩷🩷🩷

11/11/2025

🌿 A Little Re-Introduction…

It’s been a wild few months here, and since so many new faces have joined recently — hi, I’m Nicole 👋

I’m a neurodivergent psychology student, designer, and storyteller who writes (and sometimes overshares) about life beyond burnout. This page started as a way to process my own healing, but it’s become a space for the rest of us, the ones learning to live with our brains instead of against them.

You’ll see me talk about things like:

🧠 Navigating ADHD, autism, trauma, and chronic illness

💬 Breaking cycles of masking and burnout

☕ The messy middle between healing and just surviving

🌿 Family life, slow living, and small wins that actually count

Lately, I’ve been learning how to build a gentler life — one that makes room for creativity, comfort, and rest without guilt.

If any of that sounds familiar, you’re in the right place.
You’ll find free posts, reflections, and the occasional chaos update here… plus deeper, behind-the-scenes bits for subscribers and Ko-fi supporters who help keep the lights on.

I’m really glad you’re here — whether you’re just finding your footing, or already knee-deep in your own unmasking journey.

💭 Tell me something about you what brought you here, or what you’re learning about yourself lately?

11/11/2025

Understanding my brain has changed everything — not because I’ve “fixed” it, but because I’ve finally stopped fighting it. I plan around my energy instead of the clock.I listen to my body instead of the pressure to keep up. And honestly? That’s when life started feeling lighter.

💭 What’s one thing you do differently now that you understand your brain better?

✨ You’re allowed to build a life that fits you — not one that constantly burns you out.

11/11/2025

Sorry but…😅

No hate to Liam.
Henry was made for the role and had a love for it in a way that can’t be replicated 🖤🐺

11/11/2025

😌🖤

❤️💯

11/11/2025

I don’t talk about it much on here, but I love anime! 😍 The storytelling, the emotion, the artwork, the world-building… all of it. I’ve started watching Gachuajuta lately and it’s reignited that feeling of being completely absorbed in a world that just gets it, the chaos, the resilience, the beauty in imperfection.

I’d love to know 🤔

💬 What’s your favourite anime, and why does it stick with you? Is it the message, the art style, a specific character, or just the comfort of escaping into it?

Bonus points if you’ve ever found one that felt oddly therapeutic. 🥰