Stuart Downing Life Coach & NLP

08/10/2025

02/10/2025

The wolf in sheep’s clothing .

Men who abuse women... physically, mentally, emotionally... are often some of the nicest, most charming, friendly men you’ll ever meet.
And that’s exactly how they get away with it.
They smile in public. They hold conversations with ease. They seem respectful, well-mannered, maybe even generous. To the outside world, they’re the “good guy.” The one everyone likes. The one no one would ever suspect.
But behind closed doors? It’s a different story.
That charm turns cold. That “gentle tone” becomes condescending. That kindness flips into manipulation. The same man who compliments strangers can go home and slowly break down a woman’s confidence until she no longer recognizes herself.
Abuse doesn’t always show up with bruises. Sometimes it looks like silent control. Like guilt trips. Like gaslighting her until she questions her reality. Like isolating her from friends and family with a smile on his face and “good intentions” in his words. It’s emotional warfare… dressed up in charisma.
And the worst part? When she finally speaks up… people don’t believe her. Because he’s so nice. Because he would never. Because he seems like such a great guy. So she stays quiet. Or worse, she starts to wonder if she’s the problem. That’s how deep emotional abuse runs.
This is why so many women stay longer than they should. Not because they’re weak, but because psychological abuse is confusing. It’s a cycle of love and harm… of “I’m sorry” and “You made me do it.” It’s being made to feel crazy for having boundaries. It’s having your pain questioned because he smiles in public and only shows his darkness in private.
So let’s stop equating niceness with goodness. Let’s stop assuming someone can’t be an abuser because they’re well-liked or successful or soft-spoken. Abusers don’t wear name tags. They don’t always yell. Some of them walk through life with perfect masks... and leave destruction behind closed doors.
Believe her when she says something’s not right.
Support her even when it doesn’t “look” like abuse.
Because sometimes the most dangerous man in the room…
is the one everyone’s busy praising.
If any of the above resonates and you feel you need some help getting through and past this experience , call/ email
[email protected]. uk to discuss how Narcasstic recovery coaching will help
07825 599340

Stuart Downing is a top life coach, personal coach & executive coach working in London, across the UK, and worldwide via coaching online.

24/09/2025

Narcissists are not sick, they are evil. They are selfish. They are liars. They manipulate you to serve their interests. They don’t make mistakes—they make calculated moves. Everything they do is deliberate, designed to control, confuse, and consume. They will study your weaknesses, mirror your desires, and pretend to be everything you’ve ever wanted, just to hook you in. Once you’re caught in their web, the mask begins to slip.

They isolate you. They drain your energy, your confidence, your joy. They twist your words, gaslight your reality, and condition you to doubt your own instincts. They will shame you for speaking up, punish you for having needs, and praise you only when you’re broken enough to be easily controlled. Their love is a lie, their affection a tool, their apologies a trap.

They play the victim while making you the villain. And the more you forgive, the more they exploit. Narcissists don’t just lie—they erase the truth. They destroy your sense of self so they can rebuild you in a way that benefits them. They feed on attention, admiration, and fear. They see empathy as weakness and kindness as something to exploit.

And when you’re no longer useful? They discard you coldly, cruelly, and without a second thought. They rewrite the narrative to protect their image, often smearing your name to cover up the damage they caused. There is no closure, no accountability, and no remorse.

Make no mistake: narcissists aren’t broken souls looking for healing. They are hollow predators looking for supply. What they do is not accidental. It is intentional, it is destructive, and it is evil.

29/08/2025

ADHD is deeply misunderstood.
Most people think it’s just “being easily distracted.”
But ADHD is a complex neurological condition—and it comes with strengths most people never talk about.
Here are 8 truths about ADHD everyone should know:
1. It’s not a lack of attention—it’s a dysregulation of it.
People with ADHD can hyperfocus for hours on what they love—and totally ignore everything else. It’s not about laziness, it’s about control.
2. It’s not just a childhood thing.
ADHD often continues into adulthood. The symptoms just shift:
→ Less bouncing off the walls
→ More mental chaos, disorganization, and overwhelm
Many adults live undiagnosed for years.
3. ADHD brains are wired for novelty and stimulation.
Routine can feel unbearable—but these brains thrive in:
→ High-pressure environments
→ Creative problem solving
→ Fast feedback loops
In the right setting, ADHD becomes a superpower.
4. Rejection Sensitivity is real.
ADHD often includes RSD—Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria.
Criticism or perceived failure can feel crushing.
It’s emotional pain that gets misdiagnosed as mood disorders.
5. Many ADHDers are natural entrepreneurs.
They’re:
→ Big-picture thinkers
→ Risk-takers
→ Unafraid of uncertainty
They struggle with rigid systems—but thrive when creating their own.
6. Executive function is the real challenge.
ADHD affects the brain’s ability to:
→ Plan
→ Prioritize
→ Start/finish tasks
It’s not about intelligence—it’s about activation.
7. Movement helps focus.
→ Pacing
→ Fidgeting
→ Walking while thinking
These aren’t distractions—they’re coping tools.
Even cardio can boost focus and mood.
8. Structure = freedom.
Yes, really.
→ Lists
→ Calendars
→ Visual reminders
These tools reduce overwhelm and build momentum.
Structure doesn’t box ADHDers in—it frees them.
ADHD isn’t a flaw.
It’s a different operating system.
Understand it. Support it. Harness it.
Call Stuart - 07825 599340 to explore how ADHD coaching can improve your life
[email protected]

Stuart Downing is a top life coach, personal coach & executive coach working in London, across the UK, and worldwide via coaching online.

22/08/2025

Beliefs and Behaviours

You are the sum of what you think about consistently.

Not here and there.

Not once in a while.

Every single day.

If most of your mental energy is tied up in fear, doubt, and worry, don’t be surprised when your life starts to look like the inside of your head.

But if your focus is locked on growth, gratitude, and goals—you’re going to start seeing more of those things show up.

Your mind is a factory, and your thoughts are the blueprints.

Whatever you give it, it will build.

Whatever you dwell on, you will create.

And it’s happening whether you’re aware of it or not.

If you don’t like where you’re headed, start by auditing what’s been running on repeat in your mind.

You can’t hand the factory a blueprint for boxes and expect it to roll out toys.

Every thought you have is a design file sent straight to production. The second you think it, the machines start running.

The only question is: what are you building?

Life doesn’t deliver on what you casually wish for—it runs the orders you place with your thinking.

And here’s the thing: the production floor is always running.

It doesn’t care if you feed it plans for hope or fear, discipline or excuses—it will manufacture whatever you hand it.

Picture your mind as both the architect’s desk and the assembly line.

Every morning, you clock in with a set of blueprints.

Some are powerful—hope, courage, gratitude, ambition.

Others are destructive—fear, self-doubt, anger, procrastination.

Regardless, every single one goes into production.

Through your focus, attention, and words—you’re constantly issuing build orders.

Over time, those designs become your mindset. Your mindset dictates the projects you take on.

Your projects drive your actions. Your actions produce the results you see in your life.

If you don’t like what’s rolling off the line, don’t blame the market, the economy, or bad luck.

Check the blueprints you’ve been sending to the floor.

Call Stuart - 07825 599340 to discuss how a coaching programme could benefit you

stuart@stuartdowning,co,uk

13/08/2025

🚘 “I wasn’t the smartest. I wasn’t the richest. But I was the only one who refused to let go of the wheel when the road became impossible.” 🔥

My name is Kiichiro Toyoda.
You may recognize my last name — it now appears on millions of vehicles around the world. But my story didn’t start in an auto factory. It began in a small workshop, surrounded by sewing machines and looms.

My father built a textile empire. But I dreamed of engines, not threads.
And when I told people I wanted to build a Japanese car, they laughed.

🇯🇵 At the time, Japan imported nearly all vehicles. Competing with American giants?
A joke.
A su***de mission.
I used money from my father’s company to start what would become Toyota Motor Corporation — and for that, I was called a traitor.

Then came the war.
Resources vanished.
A bomb destroyed part of our factory.
We lost workers, friends, hope.
But we didn’t stop.

We slept on the floor of that broken factory.
We shared rice, scraps of metal — and an unshakable will to create.
We didn’t even have paint for the cars — we used whatever was available.
And still… we built.
With fear, with hunger — but also with a kind of courage that can’t be taught.

⚙️ Years later, Toyota would stand for endurance, humility, and relentless innovation.
But every wheel we ever produced carries invisible scars.

“Toyota wasn’t born in a boardroom — it was born in the heart of a destroyed factory, held up by hands that refused to stop.” 🏭🛠️

When everything around you seems to be at a standstill…
Sometimes, all it takes is to ignite your inner engine — and keep going, even if no one believes you’ll make it. 🚀

— Kiichiro Toyoda

12/08/2025

Did you know that Elon Musk — now one of the richest men in the world — spent much of his childhood alone, buried in science fiction books and dreaming about space… while being bullied at school?

Born in Pretoria, South Africa in 1971, he was programming his first computer by age nine. But in the schoolyard, he wasn’t the popular kid — he endured beatings and constant mockery. That loneliness drove him into the world of imagination, reading up to ten hours a day.

At 17, he made a life-changing choice: to leave his home country with nothing but a suitcase and a few dollars, chasing a future in North America. He washed dishes, cleaned boilers, and slept on borrowed couches — but never stopped learning or thinking big.

In the ’90s, with his brother, he founded Zip2, an online city guide that sold for over $300 million. Then came X.com, which evolved into PayPal, revolutionizing online payments. And when most would retire comfortably, he bet everything on three risky industries: electric cars (Tesla), solar energy (SolarCity), and reusable rockets (SpaceX).

By 2008, Tesla was on the brink of bankruptcy, SpaceX had failed three launches in a row, and his marriage was falling apart. Musk called it “the most painful year” of his life. Yet he risked his last dollar to fund a fourth launch. This time, Falcon 1 reached orbit — and days later, NASA awarded him a multi-million-dollar contract.

Today, Tesla leads the shift to electric mobility, and SpaceX is planning human missions to Mars. Musk went from a lonely boy staring at the stars to the man building the road to reach them.

Moral: No matter how many times you fall, if your dreams are bigger than your fears, you can change the world. 🌍✨

13/07/2025

With age… your eyes may stop seeing up close, and your ears may miss the distant sounds.
You sleep fewer hours, you walk a little slower—
But something beautiful begins to happen.

You start loving yourself a little more.
You carry fewer regrets.
And you begin to chase your own happiness—without apology.

You become selective with your circle.
Only the real ones remain.
You stop searching for answers you already carry inside, and you no longer need unsolicited advice.

You don’t greet those who never greeted you.
And you no longer waste energy arguing with people who don’t know how to listen.

With the years, you realize:
There’s only one life—and it’s far too precious to live in fear.

So you slow down.
You savor the little moments.
You embrace your wrinkles.
And you stop giving the mirror the power to define your worth.

Because growing older isn’t about fading.
It’s about finally shining—on your own terms. 💫

— Richard Gere

11/07/2025

Morgan Freeman once said:
"There comes a day when you no longer feel the need to prove anything to anyone. Not because you’ve given up, but because you’ve grown."
You grow tired — tired of explaining, of justifying, of shrinking yourself to fit into other people’s lives.
Tired of waiting for messages that never come, apologies that never arrive, people who don’t know how to love.
The truth is simple:
Not everyone will understand you.
Not everyone will stay.
Not everyone will treat you the way you deserve.
But they don’t have to.
Because there comes a moment when you choose peace.
You choose silence over reaction.
You stop lowering yourself into other people’s storms.
Because sometimes, the most mature response is silence.
The strongest move is to walk away.
And the greatest act of self-love is to stop putting yourself last.
It’s not selfishness — it’s healing.
It’s the courage to choose yourself.
To rebuild your soul without anyone’s approval.
To keep moving forward — even alone — but with dignity.
And when you do that… life begins to realign.
Because the right people don’t ask for explanations.
They see you.
They feel you.
They respect you — without you having to beg for it.
— Morgan Freeman

06/07/2025

Steve Jobs said before his death.
He died a billionaire at 56yrs of Pancreatic Cancer and here are his last gifts to us…his thoughts on Life:

"I reached the pinnacle of success in the business world. In others’ eyes my life is an epitome of success.

However, aside from work, I have little joy. In the end, wealth is only a fact of life that I am accustomed to.

At this moment, lying on the sick bed and recalling my whole life, I realize that all the recognition and

wealth that I took so much pride in, have paled and become meaningless in the face of impending death.

You can employ someone to drive the car for you, make money for you but you cannot have someone to bear the sickness for you.

Material things lost can be found. But there is one thing that can never be found when it is lost – "Life".

When a person goes into the operating room, he will realize that there is one book that he has yet to finish reading – "Book of Healthy Life".

Whichever stage in life we are at right now, with time, we will face the day when the curtain comes down.

Treasure Love for your family, love for your spouse, love for your friends...

Treat yourself well. Cherish others.

As we grow older, and hence wiser, we slowly realize that wearing a $300 or $30 watch - they both tell the same time...

Whether we carry a $300 or $30 wallet/handbag - the amount of money inside is the same;

Whether we drive a $150,000 car or a $30,000 car, the road and distance is the same, and we get to the same destination.

Whether we drink a bottle of $300 or $10 wine - the hangover is the same;

Whether the house we live in is 300 or 3000 sq ft - loneliness is the same.

You will realize, your true inner happiness does not come from the material things of this world.

Whether you fly first or economy class, if the plane goes down - you go down with it...

Therefore.. I hope you realize, when you have mates, buddies and old friends, brothers and sisters, who you chat with, laugh with, talk with, have sing songs with, talk about north-south-east-west or heaven and earth, .... That is true happiness!!

Five Undeniable Facts of Life :
1. Don't educate your children to be rich. Educate them to be Happy. So when they grow up they will know the value of things not the price.

2. Best awarded words in London ... "Eat your food as your medicines. Otherwise you have to eat medicines as your food."

3. The One who loves you will never leave you for another because even if there are 100 reasons to give up he or she will find one reason to hold on.

4. There is a big difference between a human being and being human.
Only a few really understand it.

5. You are loved when you are born. You will be loved when you die. In between, You have to manage!

NOTE: If you just want to Walk Fast, Walk Alone! But if you want to Walk Far, Walk Together!

Six Best Doctors in the World
1. Sunlight
2. Rest
3. Exercise
4. Diet
5. Self Confidence and
6. Friends

Maintain them in all stages of Life and enjoy a healthy life.

Life coaching
[email protected]
Call / WhatsApp 07825 599340
www.stuartdowning.co.uk
Stuart Downing Anxiety,Stress and Well being Coach Group

06/07/2025

It’s heartbreaking when you realize that maybe the safest way to live is alone. You get older, and the hope of finding someone solid, someone to build a real life with, starts to fade. People are too self-absorbed, caught in the streets, hung up on an ex, or trapped in their past. Or worse, you meet someone who drifts into your life, disrupts your peace just enough to keep you hooked, but never fully chooses you - never stays, but never lets you go either.
We’re living in a generation where toxicity is normalized, where settling for chaos feels easier than holding out for something real. And the saddest part? Staying single starts to feel like the only way to protect your sanity, your heart, your peace because the alternative is playing a game where no one follows the rules.
Real relationships built on honesty, commitment, and real communication feel almost mythical now. And the loneliest realization is knowing exactly what you have to offer, but realizing there’s no one out there who’ll truly value it. No table to bring it to. Just empty chairs.