07/12/2025
BREAKING NEWS:
10 Reasons Why Senator Neda Imasuen (Edo South) Is Far Better Than Senator Natasha (Kogi Central)
1. While Senator Natasha is constantly bothering her constituents, calling them every time to commission or inaugurate something and disturbing their lives, Senator Neda cares about his people. Because he puts them first, he would never stress his constituency with stupid things like progress or development.
2. Senator Neda Imasuen is the only senator in Nigeria with a 100% success rate. He made history and cracked the code: if you don’t start or do anything, you can’t fail.
3. Senator Neda Imasuen is a master economist. He’s singlehandedly teaching his constituency how to fend for themselves and never depend on the government for anything, ever.
4. Senator Neda saves you time. Going through his achievements is a 2-second read because it’s blank. Contains nothing. He’s the king of efficiency. It makes X tweets feel like a novel.
5. Senator Imasuen cares about the health of his constituents. He’s singlehandedly making people exercise by not fixing roads in his constituency. Because the roads are so bad for vehicles and even keke, people are forced to walk and exercise. This is genius, by the way. Hats off to you, sir.
6. Senator Imasuen saves you money. People in Kogi Central spend millions of naira on internet subscriptions just to keep up with what their senator is doing on social media. Not the people of Edo South. They don’t spend a kobo checking for projects or developments from Senator Neda, because they know there’s nothing to check. That’s millions of naira saved for rent, land, school fees, etc.
7. It takes skill to do absolutely nothing. One monk said, “For us as monks, we are inspired by our dear senator. We look up to him and hope to learn the difficult skill of total silence for almost four years.” If you doubt this, try doing nothing for two weeks straight. You’ll appreciate the Distinguished Senator more.
8. No development, no projects = no disappointment.
9. Senator Neda is impartial. Unlike Senator Natasha, who chooses to empower a portion of her population and not every single person, Senator Neda is fair, he gives no preferential treatment to anyone, including himself. A good example is the road to his house. To show love and equality, he left all the roads in their terrible state, including his own. His people appreciate his impartiality.
10. The people of Edo South love Senator Neda so much that they’re worried the next senator may not meet his invisibility standards. So, they’ve decided to stop him from seeking a second term, because his standards and achievements are already too high. They say no one else could ever break his records if he goes for a second term.
