How Not To FK Up Your Kids

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How Not To FK Up Your Kids

10 episodes that answer all of your biggest parenting questions 💭

With Kitty Hagenbach and Katie Goldfinch🎙️

👇 Listen now👇

linktr.ee/hownottofkupyourkids

19/08/2025

It’s easy to get caught up in guiding and correcting our children, especially when life feels busy. What stays with them the most isn’t how many rules they followed, it’s how seen and loved they felt along the way 🧡

A few minutes of deep, genuine connection can do more for their sense of safety and belonging than constant correction ever could.

Connection is what shapes trust and helps our children thrive.

Kitty 🧡

15/08/2025

Let us reintroduce ourselves 👋

We’re Kitty & Katie, co-hosts of How Not to F #*k Up Your Kids, a parenting podcast that’s changing the conversation around what it means to raise resilient humans.

We talk about everything from early development to family meltdowns, with zero pressure to be the “perfect parent,” because that simply doesn’t exist.

💛 10 episodes out now (with more on the way 👀)
🎧 Listen wherever you get your podcasts via the link in bio

13/08/2025

This is the heart of our podcast.

There’s no such thing as a perfect parent. Chasing perfection not only burns you out, but it also puts pressure on your child to be perfect too...

What children really need is you. Present, listening and willing to repair when things go wrong.

You can't get it right all the time, but you can keep showing up with love. That’s where trust grows and resilience begins.

Kitty 🧡

08/08/2025

Boundaries give children the structure they need to feel secure and the freedom to thrive.

When we set kind, consistent boundaries, we show our children that they...

✨ Are safe
✨ Are held
✨ Are loved (even when things are hard)

Boundaries are about safety, clarity and connection.

Kitty 🧡

04/08/2025

Listening is one of the most powerful forms of love 🧡

Just truly hearing someone, especially a child, is one of the most meaningful ways we can show them they matter.

In parenting, it’s easy to jump into problem-solving mode. Often the most healing thing we can offer is simply our presence.

Kitty 🧡

30/07/2025

When our children act out, it’s often because they’re overwhelmed, not because they’re trying to be difficult.

They’re still learning how to manage emotions, and sometimes those feelings come out loud and messy.

What they need in those moments isn’t shame or shutdown. It’s our calm, our presence and a safe space to ride the wave.

Correction can come later.

Kitty 🧡

24/07/2025

Our children's confidence grows from being understood 🧡

When a child feels that we really get them, their thoughts, feelings and struggles, it helps them trust themselves and the world around them.

Understanding says 👇

"You make sense"
"You’re allowed to be you"
"I’m here with you, no matter what"

Kitty 🧡

17/07/2025

When a child acts out or seems ‘difficult’ there’s usually something underneath.

It might be tiredness, overwhelm, or a deeper feeling they don’t yet have words for. Instead of jumping straight to correction, try to pause and ask “What might they be trying to tell me?”

This small shift can open the door to connection, understanding, and trust.

Kitty 🧡

11/07/2025

Holding boundaries doesn’t mean being harsh, and showing compassion doesn’t mean saying yes to everything.

When we set clear, respectful boundaries with warmth we offer children safety, structure and emotional security.

Compassion helps us understand our child’s feelings. Boundaries help us guide their behaviour.

Together, they create connection and clarity (which is exactly what growing minds need)

Kitty 🧡

07/07/2025

You don’t need to be the perfect parent, just good enough 🧡

We can’t always get it right as parents…

Perfection sets an impossible standard, not just for us, but for our children too. If we had to be perfect parents, it would imply our children need to be perfect as well, which is far too much pressure for a growing child.

What they really need is for us to be present, responsive and willing to repair when things go wrong.

This idea is at the heart of our podcast. If you haven’t listened yet, you can find it via the link in our bio 🎧

Kitty 🧡

03/07/2025

Every time a child expresses an emotion, they’re learning how the world responds to their inner world 🌍

When we meet their feelings with patience, curiosity and care, we show them that they (and their emotions) are safe.

Over time, our responses become the voice they carry inside...

“You’re allowed to feel this”
“You’re not too much”
“You’re loved just as you are”

Kitty 🧡

26/06/2025

As parents or caregivers, it’s natural to want to fix sadness, frustration, or tears.

But often, what children need most is for us to simply be with them in the feeling, not to rush it away, but to make space for it.

Sitting with their emotions teaches them that feelings aren’t something to fear or hide… they’re something we can move through, together.

You don’t need the perfect words. Your presence is enough.

Kitty 🧡

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http://www.hownottofuckupyourkids.co.uk/

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