
30/08/2025
BREAKING NEWS ⚠️
Somewhere in the chronicles of human suffering, a Qatar-based investor from Kenya decided to plant seeds of fatherhood… only for the soil to be pure Sahara sand. Man upgraded madam from bedsitter to 3-bedroom, wired her a monthly “maternity allowance,” and even funded VIP antenatal clinics because evidence was flowing: growing belly pics, glowing face, clinic receipts, the whole Netflix series.
Then, plot twist of the century… Son of Adam lands in Nairobi unannounced, ready to serenade the “baby bump” and whisper lullabies to his heir. He reaches for the royal belly only to discover… inflated dreams, zero foetus.
Ladies and gentlemen, the pregnancy was sponsored by Photoshop and chapati.
Men, open your eyes. Love is sweet until Safaricom messages become your midwife. 😭