In gist with AMAKA GOLD

In gist with AMAKA GOLD this page is all about gist, funny quotes, motivational talk, relationship talk and comedy
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My dear! Before you open your mouth and call somebody “friend,” shine torchlight behind your back o! Because some of the...
06/09/2025

My dear! Before you open your mouth and call somebody “friend,” shine torchlight behind your back o! Because some of them are only clapping for you in front and clapping tunda behind you 😭👏☠️

They will call you “sister” in your presence and “suspect” in your absence! You go think say you’re in friendship, but they’re in championship of gossip 🥲😩

Please, don’t be forming bestie with a snake that only hisses sweet things in your ear but spits venom when you're not there! 🐍💔

My sister, this life ehn… sometimes being a good person no be guarantee say dem go love you oh! Na there dem go begin us...
06/09/2025

My sister, this life ehn… sometimes being a good person no be guarantee say dem go love you oh! Na there dem go begin use you like free WiFi 😩. You go dey nice, dey helpful, dey gentle like morning breeze, yet dem go just dey collect from you like ATM wey no dey reject card.

But no worry! No let their b@d character turn you to werey. Still dey do good oh! Because at the end, na God go reward you — no be dem wey dey chop your kindness like jollof rice. Just shine your eye small make dem no carry your mumu do handbag 👜😂.

Be good, but no be g0at wey dem go dey drag anyhow 😏.

A woman fit love you scatter! I mean m@dly o, she go dey sing your name like praise and worship—"Brother Kelvin, the sug...
06/09/2025

A woman fit love you scatter! I mean m@dly o, she go dey sing your name like praise and worship—"Brother Kelvin, the sugar in my zobo, the engine oil of my jollof!" 😭❤️

But the moment you start dey pose like say na you be iPhone 16 Pro Max wey no reach Nigeria yet, she go dust her slippers and waka comot like th!ef wey escape village meeting! 😭🏃🏾‍♀️💨

Because let’s be honest—na love she get, no be amnesia! 🤷🏾‍♀️

So brother, humble yourself. You no be the prize, this one no be reality show! 🫣
Love no mean say person go tolerate overdo n0nsense. 💔😂

Be calming down o, before she use you do "chapter closed." 📖🚪

06/09/2025

No dey expect say because you dey give love, care, attention, recharge card, spaghetti and even your last meatpie — say dem go return am! My dear, not everybody get heart wey dey beat like your own o!

Some people dey operate on "receive and vanish" ministry. You go give them 100%, dem go respond with 2%, and still carry face like who Federal Government owe! 😩

You dey think say because you dey treat person like gold, dem go treat you like diamond? Omo, some go treat you like pure water nylon wey breeze don blow enter gutter!

So just dey do your good with sense, no go carry your soft heart give person wey dey use stone fry egg! Na beg I dey beg you o! 💔😂

Some people go disappear from your life like pure water sachet wey breeze carry, no call, no text, no smoke signal 🚶‍♂️💨...
06/09/2025

Some people go disappear from your life like pure water sachet wey breeze carry, no call, no text, no smoke signal 🚶‍♂️💨… then one blessed day, they go just reappear like ghost wey forget their slippers for your house 👻😂. Na so dem go dey expect to still meet you as the same person wey dem left — same mindset, same lifestyle, same level. But life no dey wait for anybody ooo, no be cinema wey you fit pause and continue later 🍿🎬. By the time dem bounce back, you don already upgrade to version 10.0 with new settings, fresh goals, better software and antivirus wey no dey allow n0 tonsense enter again 💪😂🔥.

Na dem go now dey ask, “Ah, you don change o?” … My brother/sister, yes! Na free trial you dey use before, now na premium package wey no get discount 🤣👏.

Fæke don too turn normal for this life that if you just open mouth talk true, people go vex like say you sla.p them with...
06/09/2025

Fæke don too turn normal for this life that if you just open mouth talk true, people go vex like say you sla.p them with hot amala 🍲😂. Honesty now dey sound like iñsult, and fåke life don dey wear crown 👑. You go see person borrow shoe, rent wig, snap picture inside hotel wey no be their own, post am with caption “Living the soft life” meanwhile mosquito for their house dey hold family meeting 🦟🤣.

This generation no wan hear truth again, if you tell am as e be, dem go tag you “hâter” or “bâd belle” 🙄. Fãke life don sweet pass original, na why when real people show face, everybody go dey uncomfortable. But no wahala, truth no dey expire, fãke dey always expire like gala wey stay under sun 🌞😂.

Moral of the story: if you be real, continue dey real, even if fâke people dey cr.y. After all, original Coke no dey compete with sachet cola 🥤🔥.

If na to wait make your in-laws like you before you marry, my sister, about 65% of people for still dey single dey pluck...
06/09/2025

If na to wait make your in-laws like you before you marry, my sister, about 65% of people for still dey single dey pluck mango for compound. Some in-laws no go like you even if you cook heaven rice with angel stew, e no go sweet them. Na why you gats just marry your person wey make your heart dey do gbim gbim and leave their approval for God to handle. If love sure, carry your partner waka go altar before village people turn the matter to committee meeting. 💃🏽💍🔥

Every tribe get angel and devi! join together 😏. No tribe holy pass, no tribe w!cked finish. You fit see saint wey gentl...
06/09/2025

Every tribe get angel and devi! join together 😏. No tribe holy pass, no tribe w!cked finish. You fit see saint wey gentle like lamb inside tribe wey you swear say na only bæd people dey, and you fit jam stubb0rn goat inside tribe wey you think say na heaven direct them come. Life no get tribal filter o 😂. So abeg, stop dey use person tribe take do conclusion, because you fit miss better human wey go change your destiny 💃🏾, or hug bad market wey go collect your peace of mind 🫠.

I dey always laugh when I hear people say economy good those days, and my question, Who tell you say that time economy ...
06/09/2025

I dey always laugh when I hear people say economy good those days, and my question, Who tell you say that time economy good?

🤣 My dear forget! Car wey be 100k, how many people buy am? Cement 100 naira, how many build house?

Even our grandpapa and grandmama dey complain that time say meat and fish don cost, dem no dey chop meat unless dem set trap for bush catch animal 😂

Life no ever easy o, na you fit arrange am for yourself make e look easy. 30 years from now, we sef go dey say say this today life sweet pass. When government school dey free, how many people even go? Now school cost d!e but graduates full everywhere like pure water.

Life na turn by turn, level by level. As a man, carry woman wey match your level, build together. Good women still dey, just open eye well. Men dey in sizes, life dey in phases 🙌👍
In gist with AMAKA GOLD

My dear, l0neliness no be small s!ckness o, e dey finish person pass malaria when you don cross 50 and you no get partne...
06/09/2025

My dear, l0neliness no be small s!ckness o, e dey finish person pass malaria when you don cross 50 and you no get partner to gist with. You go just dey talk to wall, laugh with chair, quãrrel with mosquito, and c.r.y with your own shad0w. Life no be to dey strong alone like lion, abeg. If you no see husband or wife wey go hold your hand, at least hold pikin, either carry your own from belle or go adopt. Because when old age land, na companionship go be your medicine, no be paracetamol.
Loneliness na d!sease wey no get medicine for pharmacy
In gist with AMAKA GOLD

As you dey grow old, you go just dey look life with one kind tired eye. Things wey dey sweet you before go begin look li...
05/09/2025

As you dey grow old, you go just dey look life with one kind tired eye.

Things wey dey sweet you before go begin look like stress. Party wey you suppose enjoy sleep
no gree leave you,

Food wey you fit chop full pot before, na small plate you go dey manage. Even wahala wey you fit drag with confidence, you no go even get strength to argue again, you go just say “abeg, make peace hold body.” This life no balance at all, e be like motor wey dey run with three tyres, always shaking but still moving.
In gist with AMAKA GOLD

Before you carry block and cement say you wan build relationship, abeg first check who get the land oh! Because e fit be...
04/09/2025

Before you carry block and cement say you wan build relationship, abeg first check who get the land oh! Because e fit be community land wey everybody dey claim ownership. You go just dey invest your love, dey buy furniture, dey lay foundation, before you hear gbam! elders of the village go show face say, “my pikin shift, this land no be for only you.” 😂😂

Hope you understand me oh, make dem no use your heart do estate for public use! 🤔
In gist with AMAKA GOLD

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