20/09/2025
*At one point, I felt my husband was a lazy man, or he was not doing enough.*
At 34, with two kids and a husband, I thought I had mastered the art of gratitude. My husband, Adebayo, dealt in Aso-oke at Sabo market, Akure. He was hardworking, God-fearing, and intentional about his family. With the profit from his business, he had even purchased two keke napep that brought in steady weekly returns.
In just seven years of marriage, we had a roof over our heads, food on our table, and a promising future. He always assured me that his old Corolla 2000 model would soon be replaced with something better.
But the day we moved into that new environment, something shifted in me.
I began to notice what I lacked rather than what I had.
When the keke drivers came to pick my children, I would stand at the balcony and watch my neighborsâ children climb into sleek GLE Mercedes Benz SUVs.
Their compound was filled with bicycles of different colorsâfive, maybe six of them. My children only managed one. Their kids attended the best schools in town, mine went to an average one.
And their motherâoh, the woman never repeated wigs. Everyday a new look, a new style. Meanwhile, I didnât even own one.
Suddenly, my husbandâs efforts didnât feel enough. My heart turned restless, and I began to nag.
One night, as he dropped into bed tired, I crossed my arms and said:
âBayo, I think we need to change the childrenâs school. This one no fit us again.â
He glanced at me, weary but calm. âBut theyâre doing so well there. Why move them when itâs affordable?â
I snapped, âAre you sure you wonât start taking them to school yourself? Every day, keke nap! Itâs embarrassing, honestly.â
He sighed, rubbing his forehead. âSo youâd prefer we put them in a school where, before we pay fees, we must sell property?â
I ignored his question and fired another one:
âWhen are you even going to change this your old car? Bayo, this motor don kpeme!â
He chuckled lightly, though I could see the sting in his eyes. âGod will help us, my dear.â
âAnd please, buy me a wig. Even if itâs just one. I canât keep looking this plain.â
He was quiet for a moment, then muttered, âWhy not be grateful? Many children trek to school daily. As for the wig, no problem. Iâll send you money to get not one but two. But mark my words, this wig will teach you something about life.â
The next day, money dropped in my account. I rushed to Instagram, ordered my wig, and waited impatiently.
When it arrived, I wore it proudly the following morning. I stood before the mirror, adjusted it, and smiled. Finally, I belong.
But as I stepped outside with my kids, ready to follow the keke driver, my neighbor drove past with her children. She was glowing in a Brazilian bone straight wig I knew cost over a million. She waved politely before gliding off in her 2024 Kia.
I froze. My brand-new wig felt like nylon on my head.
Instead of sulking, I forced a laugh. So this is the race I signed up for? There will always be another level.
I realised that if I donât choose peace, I will never stop running after shadows. True peace is in contentment.
That evening, after school and lunch, my first son, who we had enrolled in piano lessons since he was four, sat at his keyboard. At five, he was already a little genius. He played beautifully, his little fingers dancing over the keys as he taught his younger sister. My heart melted with pride.
Then, a knock came at the door.
It was my neighbor. She smiled warmly. âGood evening. Please, forgive me for disturbing. I kept hearing piano sounds from my apartment, and I told myself, âI must find out whoâs playing so beautifully.â I canât believe itâs your son!â
I beamed, still shocked. âYes, itâs him. He loves it.â
She sighed. âWeâve spent so much money on schools and extra classes, but my children donât pick things easily. Please, can they learn from your son? Weâll even pay.â
I laughed softly and shook my head. âNo need to pay. Heâll teach them for free. Children should grow together.â
She thanked me endlessly before leaving with her kids, she said something again,
"I always admire all your beautiful Aso-oke that you rock, I don't mind knowing your dealer."
I blushed as I said,
"My husband is a dealer,"
Her face brightened with a glow as she said,
"No wonder."
We laughed and exchanged contact before she left.
I closed the door, leaned against it, and sighed deeply. That day, a truth hit me hard.
The next day, I took my kids to school and I went straight home, prepared a nice meal and headed to my husband's shop to help him out. I just reached out to my girls to handle my jewellery shop for that day.
When I arrived, he was arranging Aso-oke fabrics, carefully placing samples on shelves. His shirt clung to him with sweat, yet he smiled when he saw me.
I walked in, hugged him from behind, and whispered,
âáșž kĂș iáčŁáșčÌ, á»ká» mi.â (Well done, my husband).
He turned, surprise and warmth in his eyes as he replied.
I started helping him out, and he would turn and ask me,
âWhat happened?â
I drew close as I put my arms on his shoulder, and I said softly,
âI was blind,â I admitted. âI kept seeing what we didnât have, and I nagged. But I forgot that not every woman has what I haveâa visionary husband. Youâve given us comfort, stability, and hope. Youâve built us from scratch, and I should have been grateful all along.â
His face softened,and he blushed. I saw it and it made me smile too.
He pulled me close and said,
âYou know, you almost made me feel like I wasnât doing enough. But hearing this nowâit means everything. Life isnât about competing. Itâs about building steadily, with contentment.â
I smiled, wiping my eyes. âThen eat before you faint. I came to help today.â
We sat, shared the meal, laughed, and worked together. That day felt lighter, fuller. And as the evening came, I had this playful thought, maybe⊠baby number three might just be conceived tonight.
Marriage is truly beautiful. Marriage is sweet. But only when you stop competing and start appreciating.
MORALS
1. Contentment brings peace. When you stop comparing, you start living.
2. Gratitude preserves love. Appreciating your partnerâs effort builds them up, while nagging tears them down.
3. Every family has their blessings. What you lack in one area, God has already compensated for in another.
*Marriage is truly beautiful. Marriage is sweet. But only when you stop competing and start appreciating.
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Happy weekend Lovelies đ
