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WEIRD thoughts, Calabar (2025)

03/10/2025

Money has a way of revealing the ugliness of humans.

A colleague of mine who is an engineer, helped his girlfriend get an interior decoration work with our organization, and after she made money, she dumped him.

She made over 3million naira profit for a job she did in a month. That's her boyfriend's salary in a year and some months.

The things is, she went to an interior decoration school in Lagos, and improved her skills by following architects in Lagos.

As the brain behind the design, I had wanted to recommend someone, since I can't collect contract as a staff.

It was one of the smallest projects, and of course, it was easy to consider a Nigerian for its furnishing.

He approached me and begged me not to give a negative criticism of her status when she arrives for an interview:

"Guy, I wan marry this girl, and the mama even sabi me. I wan propose next month.

Guy anything you fit do -- I know say you get person, but please."

It was an opportunity for him to prove he wanted her progress.

I helped when the boss told me the idea of trying her. Because I wanted a brother's happiness, I covered up her lapses any time the boss asked me what I thought about her.

The project was in PH, and it was the only design I had done for the organisation there.

After the project, she told him her profit, and said "thank you."

She ended the call abruptly, and sent him a text never to call her again. He was hiding it from me, because it would make him look stupid, until another female colleague told me.

"No wonder I you've been avoiding me," I told him.

Then, I saw a man nearly weeping. After showing me a text where she told him never to call her again, he showed me her other text message, and it was this:

" Thank you for everything. I can't continue dating you. You can't even enter flight to visit me in lagos. Since I relocated to lagos 4months ago, I've checked it. You're not the guy for me so find another girl."

I gave him a deep hug.

My female colleague hugged him too.

I gave the lady a call afterwards, and she sincerely told me she could no longer date someone like him.

"Please, is there something he did?" I asked.

" No A. I just can't date someone I earn more than. You know say I no go fit tell am this. I still like him o. But I have eyes on better people. This is the first time I am making up to a million and I appreciate him for that. I don send am 100k sha. Send me your account number too."

" Are you really pulling his legs or what?" I asked.

" I am being true to myself," she replied.

The saddest part of it all?

The fact that they've been on many lovey dovey calls before this happened.

As I am typing this, the young man is in the hospital. His blood pressure was triggered.

On my way out of the ward, I remembered he sends her 40% of his salary every month. He even handled a certain personal project, and sent her 600k a certain time.

Honestly, he's the type of Boyfriend that deserves a medal. He's having a rough time now and hasn't sent her money in two months. Could this be the reason?

I think some humans don't even deserve hell -- the Devil's punishment will be too mild for them -- if it exists. There should be another place for more terrible humans.

In all your dealings, try to surround yourself with kind people. Sometimes, ask God to reveal the true nature of that person you're dating.

May we never make sacrifices for people who are undeserving of it.

May we never encounter heartless people in the guise of living their truth.

May we never build fruitless foundations. 🙏

03/10/2025

‎THIS IS FOR MARRIED COUPLED

Marriage is 95% carnal and 5% spiritual - shocker i know.
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‎The first time i learnt this, i had conflicts within me because that statement - especially coming from a pastor made me feel judgemental.
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‎What kind of a pastor puts spirituality at the back seat in marriage, he must be carnal, i pity his vvife.
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‎Uhmmmmm! well, he spoke the truth and nothing but the truth. There is nothing spiritual about two people who love each other and are coming to do life together.
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‎We are the ones who spiritualize everything about marriage.
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‎A vvoman would think that because she attends church and her husband doesn't, that he is the problem and she is a saint.
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‎"If only he would start going to church and get born again," yet the same vvoman has been keeping malice with her husband for 15 years.
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‎I don't understand people who let their pastors vet and choose their partners for them. I know so many young vvomen who took their suitors' pictures to their pastors for confirmation and at the end of the day, they didn't have successful marriages despite verifying him spiritually.
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‎I have never seen or heard any husband complain that he is tired of his marriage because "his vvife don't pray enough or she's not baptized by the holy ghost." If you have , let us know.
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‎I am yet to meet a vvoman who complains that her husband doesn't speak in tongues and that's why she's thinking of divorcing him.
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‎Instead the common thread is no or low quality secs, lack of money, in-laws wahala, hygiene, communication manners etc.
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‎"My husband doesn't satisfy me or my vvife denies me secs " are what we often hear. This situation doesn't require divine intervention.
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‎No level of spirituality can keep a husband that's turned off by his vvife's body 0d0ur and unkempt look.
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‎Everything we do ranging from falling in love,choosing who to marry, looking seczy and h0t for your man, different styles in bed, good meal, hygiene, soft manner of speech, respect, taking care of his needs and the home are all physical, nothing spiritual there.
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‎Sometimes what your husband needs is not you praying for his salvation but you respecting and honouring him as you should instead of your pastors.

Praying for your husband is MOST important and that’s the 5% I’m talking about.

If you misplace physicality for spirituality, you’ll cry.

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03/10/2025

The longest I have had someone around was a month.

In that one month, I did not allow them near the kitchen.

“What are you doing there?” Aunty go and sleep or press phone, abeg.

One day, I came back from work to see that my clothes had been washed and I wan crase.

“Who send you wash am?” Now my laundry guy no go see food chop this week. You don go do im job.

But then, I appreciated the gesture, but told them they didn’t have to bother.

They felt guilty that I was accommodating them, especially for that long, but wasn’t allowing them lift a pin.

As a visitor, I don’t want you doing chores when you visit me, tbf. Leave am.

Eat. Sleep. Wake up. Press your phone. Sleep again. Spread your legs. And chill.

My mattress kuku big gan. You’ll like it.

PS: After one month, you don graduate to roommate oo. So you’ll start doing what roommates do. Visitor season is over.🤣

03/10/2025

‎Tonto D**e sent a strong message to her future daughter in-law.
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‎She said and i paraphrase; that any vvoman who marries her son in the future and feels she can divorce him and take his money better be warned because all her son's assets will be registered under her name (Tonto D**e).
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‎According to her, she can't súffér to raise him and some vvoman will want to take everything because she is his vvife.
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‎Truly, i find this amusing because what she said kinda confirms the statement that vvomen know each other.
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‎Everything she has done /still doing to men ---allegedly are what she is protecting her son from.
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‎One man commented that her son will get a daughter in-law like her and other vvomen were rejecting it . Which is hilarious.
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‎Another man said "they hayted men and God gave them son. Now they're afraid of witnessing what they did to men happen to their sons."
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‎It sounds funny like she is catching cruise but there's an iota of truth in every cruise. She is low-key scared and she needs to be because deep down vvomen know the real truth about other vvomen.
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‎All men are the same except their brothers and sons. One vvoman's lovely son is another vvoman's $cúm.
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‎A comment that stood out to me was one from a lady, she said " every vvoman should pray for her son's future vvife earlier so that God will give them God fearing vvives and also pray to be alive when their sons are getting married."
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‎My first thought was ; so vvomen actually believe that not all vvives are God fearing. Not every vvife is a good thing and not every husband who finds a vvife, finds a good thing and obtains favor from the lord ?
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‎But online we pretend like all vvomen are saints and angels.
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‎Another one was that every vvoman should pray to be alive when their sons are getting married.
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‎Why is this supposed to be a prayer point?
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‎Because there are vvomen who pray that their future móthér in-laws kpai before they marry their sons to avoid mother in-law wahala. Now it reached their turn, they wanna stay alive. Lol.
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‎In life, what you sow, you reap so Tonto D**e relax, a mini you is coming for your son. That peace of mind you gave Churchill will be given to your precious son.
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24/09/2025

This man has been taking drugs for high blood pressure for 15 years. Every morning, he swallows 4 different pills.

ask him: "Uncle, after 15 years of taking these drugs, has your blood pressure gotten better?"

He looked at me confused and said: "Better? The doctor said I have to take them for life."

That's when it hit me. What if the very thing we call "medicine" is not always the cure, but sometimes the sickness?

Before you attack me in the comments, read to the end. If you have short attention span or can't think beyond what you were taught, this post may not profit you.

Let me tell you something that will shock you.

Modern medicine is not designed to cure you. It's designed to manage you.

High blood pressure? Take this pill for life.
Diabetes? Another pill for life.
Depression? One more pill for life.
Can't sleep? Here's a stronger pill.

Each drug may ease your discomfort, but it also creates side effects that need more drugs. A cycle is born.

You become a customer, not a patient.

Here's the uncomfortable truth pharmaceutical companies don't want you to know:

They are not rewarded for curing diseases. They are rewarded for creating customers.

A pill you take daily until you die is worth billions more than a one-time cure.

Think about it: If they cure your diabetes completely, you stop buying insulin. If they cure your high blood pressure, you stop buying those pills.

But if they manage your condition forever? You pay them forever.

This doesn't mean every doctor is wicked. But the system itself profits from keeping you "well enough" to function, yet never completely free.

Medicine has created a psychological sickness - the belief that health comes only from pills and hospitals.

Your diet? Secondary.
Your lifestyle? Not important.
Your environment? Ignore it.
Your stress levels? Just take a pill.

We hand over our health to an industry and forget that we have power over our own bodies.

That dependency is its own invisible disease.

THE WORD THEY DON'T WANT YOU TO KNOW

There's a medical term for this: IATROGENESIS - harm caused by medical treatment itself.

Adverse drug reactions, botched surgeries, hospital-acquired infections. Some studies list medical error as one of the leading causes of death worldwide.

The tools designed to save us can also destroy us.

Without medicine, life expectancy would collapse. Antibiotics saved millions from infections. Vaccines erased diseases. Insulin keeps diabetics alive.

Modern medicine is both miracle and menace.

The question is not whether medicine works - it does. The question is whether the system guiding it serves your health or its own survival.

Medicine itself is not the disease. The medical-industrial complex is - a machine that thrives on keeping you dependent.

True healing should mean fewer prescriptions, fewer hospital visits, fewer chains.

Instead, we have a model where your sickness fuels their profit.

Start asking different questions:

"Will this treatment cure me or manage me?"
"What caused this problem in the first place?"
"Can I address the root cause instead of just the symptoms?"
"What role does my lifestyle play in this condition?"

Medicine can cure or enslave, depending on who controls it and how you choose to use it.

The real challenge for our generation is learning how to reclaim health from a system that profits from keeping us just sick enough to need it.

Medical practitioners reading this - this is not an attack on your intelligence. This is me thinking out loud about a system that may be bigger than all of us.

But patients, don't be a passive consumer of healthcare. Be an active participant in your own healing.

Your health is too important to leave entirely in someone else's hands.

To your true health!

24/09/2025

The rate at which kidney disease is growing in Nigeria, something needs to be done because it's getting out of hands. Why has the disease become so common like malaria? It wasn't like this before. So what's going on in Nigeria?
Both children, youths and elderly ones are developing kidney problems every day.
You'll open social media and people with this disease are crying for help😞.. It was never like this before, what happened?

I was at Maitama Hospital yesterday, I went to greet a Doctor friend and he has a patient who is currently undergoing kidney disease treatment. The final conclusion was for the family to fly him to India for the transplant surgery. His legs were swollen😞..
Out of curiosity, I decided to ask him why has this disease become a common disease this days?
He said out of 100% of what we consume in Nigeria, 80% are fake.
And I remember a video I watched on Facebook few years ago, one man was caught producing Malts at the back of his compound and he has staffs and other people who work with him.

A fake medicine producing company was discovered in Anambra State last year and the owner of the fake company allegedly offered the sum of 3 Billion Naira bribe to National Drug Law Enforcement Agency(NDLEA) but they rejected the offer. According to the news that went viral, it was confirmed that he supplies more than 2 trucks 🚛 of those fake medicines in a day. What kind of wickedness is this?😔
So if NDLEA had accepted the offer he made, he would have continued producing fake medicines without considering the harmful side effects of it to the consumers? This is inhuman...

A lot of Fake Drinks are sold in the clubhouse and bars.
Even soft drinks like Coke and others are faked. Cooking ingredients are faked.
The rate of bitters drinks are too much. Government should do something about that.
I came out to CAC junction and stopped one lady that sells agbo medicine. I picked up one brand of those drinks they carry around and found out it doesn't have NAFDAC Reg Number but that drink is been sold in the Capital of Nigeria💔...
How are those producing companies getting their licence or they don't require license anymore?

S3xual enhancement products are another thing destroying kidneys. Every street in Nigeria are people selling one product or the other, that improves your performance on bed. After taking it, you will last forever hours, but you don't know the damages it's causing to the organs in your body.

Nigerian Government should put a very strict and harsh law against this things. It's getting too much

24/09/2025

If confidence had a face, it would be Thamsanqa Jantjie — the guy who pretended to be a sign language interpreter at Mandela’s burial.Just look at how neat and calm he looked next to Obama.

They asked for a qualified interpreter, and he boldly said, “Yes, I can do it.”Just like that, he got the job.

Now imagine… Obama is giving a serious speech, world leaders are seated, and right next to him, Thamsanqa is busy waving his hands like someone directing matatus in town.He knew nothing about sign language .

The Deaf community was confused,from which planet was the sign language,they could not understand anything.The rest of us were just stuck between laughing and cringing.

By the time they realised he was a fake,most major speeches had passed the deaf community.

Later, he claimed he had a schizophrenic episode — and not long after, he was admitted to a psychiatric hospital,it turned out he was just ok. Turns out, he also had a criminal past,boy child was just hustling by fooling the whole world,this turned to be the most trending sign language scam of the century.

That day made him famous worldwide, but for all the wrong reasons.

Lesson: Confidence can take you far — but make sure you actually know what you’re doing.

After Nigerians ,let's fear South Africans

24/09/2025

Be careful where you invest your energy, because pride and envy can ruin even the strongest bonds.

A story was told of a python and a cobra locked in battle. The python coiled tight, squeezing with all its strength, while the cobra sank its fangs deep into the python’s flesh. In the end, the python died from the Cobra's venom, and the cobra died from suffocation.

That’s how many friendships, relationships, and families fall apart... one side choking with ego, the other poisoning with gossip or deceit. Both lose.

Choose peace over competition.

14/09/2025

When you hold a grudge, you are literally applying brakes on your own growth.

Like, life is trying to take you to the next chapter but you’re still stuck on page 3, highlighting that one sentence where Becky said your shoes were fake in 2016.

A grudge is like a Netflix series you keep rewatching even though it has no new episodes. The characters moved on, the director is gone, but you’re still there pressing “next episode” on pain.

And the payback mentality? Bruh. That’s just signing a full-time contract with immaturity. You’ll be 45 years old, with three kids, a mortgage, and still plotting in the shower like, “One day I’ll get Susan back for eating my yoghurt in the office fridge.”

Because if multiple people have wronged you, what are you gonna do hold multiple grudges like they’re collectibles? “Ah yes, this shelf is for the family betrayals, that corner is for workplace beef, and this whole room is for my exes. Don’t touch anything, I’m still plotting.”

The time you spend thinking about revenge is Olympic-level uselessness.

Like, imagine spending six months scheming how to clap back, and when you finally pull it off, all you get is a 10-second dopamine rush. Congratulations, you’ve just wasted half a year to feel the same satisfaction you could’ve gotten from eating a plate of hot wings.

Even if you win that revenge game, nothing in your life changes. Rent is still due, your WiFi is still slow, and you’re still stuck with the same face in the mirror.

Meanwhile, the person you’re angry at is on vacation somewhere, sipping a cocktail, wondering why the hell you haven’t moved on.
At the end of the day, grudges are just expensive emotional investments with zero returns.

It’s like buying shares in a company that went bankrupt in 2004, but you still check the stock prices every morning like, “Maybe it’ll bounce back.” Spoiler alert: it won’t.

14/09/2025

A fresh bachelor does not marry a single mother of two. That's not the natural way of life.

Several women have asked about this recently, and we need to get this out of the way.

If you see a man doing that, he knows something you don't. There's always an element of mischief or compensation.

He could be compensating for fertility issues, severe low self-esteem issues, or he could be mischievously trapping the woman into a terrible bargain.

'I'll accept you with your children, and you'll take care of me financially.'

'I'll accept you with your children, but you must not ask me anything about loyalty or which other women I philander with out there.'

'I'll accept you with your children, and you'll become my punching bag to absorb my abusive energy without complaining.'

Plastic does not sink in water unless something else is holding it down.

If you see something that's not logical, it's usually psychological.

When it doesn't add up on a common sense level, it adds up on an uncommon sense level.

A bachelor has all the options in the world to marry a spinster who, like him, has neither children nor a previous marriage. If he foregoes all those options to settle for someone who is at an advanced chapter of life, there's something else he's trading off.

Perhaps he doesn't want to be tied down with legal marriage, and he wants a good woman to play wife without him marrying her legally. He wants a wife without becoming a husband.

It's never just 'love.' Nobody adopts two children without thinking about it.

Some people do you a favour so that they can use it to abuse you forever.

Others fear rejection so much that they approach the type of women who can't say no. This type will also tire you to death with that lack of confidence, as it shows up in everything, and they may become too insecure or controlling. I

As a woman, I want you to be confident, but I don't want you to be delusional.

Once some things have happened in your life, accept that some chapters have closed.

You're no longer a single girl. You're a mother now. Adjust your expectations.

This will help you avoid traps and toxic unions if not being added a third child.

You want to be equally yoked. You don't want someone who acts like you're burdensome or they need to get children out there to even the score.

In short, when you come from a single-parent situation, you're better off negotiating with other single parents.

14/09/2025

After seeing over 20000 jobless people troupe out en masse to watch Hilda Baci cook Jollof Rice, I have come to the conclusion that we have an unemployment pandemic in Nigeria.

You left your jobs. You left your work. Not for the purpose of making money or entertainment, but to watch another woman break a record of cooking the biggest pot of Jollof Rice. Not forgetting the fact that you risked your life too!

Everything could go wrong. We are in a country where we don't have adequate crowd control measures. I saw people's children struggling and squeezing themselves to enter the venue. A stampede could have resulted. What would have happened if you kpaied? What will you tell your maker? That ojukokoro or Atenuje was the cause?

It'd have made even more understandable if people who went to the venue were beggars, orphans or the needy generally. That would have been justifiable, rather than seeing people dressed well, with their expensive gadgets in hand, just to go and have a taste of party Jollof!

No matter how I try to defend it, it doesn't make sense! I read someone in the UK narrating how he had excitedly shown his colleague at work, a video of the 20000 people gathered at the event, and the colleague looked at him and asked if his country people were that jobless.

Even if we are jobless, can't we pretend to have a job at least?

Most of those e-diots who were at the venue don't even have voters card ooo! To go and collect their PVCs, you'll hear them complain that the crowd is too much at INEC, but you can go and stands for 24 hours just to taste party Jollof Rice?

Tell me God why you won't suffer for 600 years!

14/09/2025

If a man has a side chick, nine times out of ten, his main woman is the actual love of his life.
The side chick?
She’s like Netflix: fun, entertaining, gives you a couple of late-night thrills… but she ain’t replacing cable.

She’s the snack at midnight cheeseburger vibes while the main woman is the full-course meal with dessert, wine, candles, and a little background jazz music.
But if a woman has a side dude?
Ohhh, brother. Buckle your seatbelt, hold on to your edges, and say a little prayer because this right here? This ain’t the same game.

That side dude is usually the love of her life. He’s the one she laughs too hard with on the phone at 11 p.m., the one who gets the good selfies with the hair laid, not the “just woke up with drool on the pillow” ones.

The main guy? That’s the landlord. He’s paying rent, holding the fort, keeping the Wi-Fi on… but the side dude? He’s the one rearranging furniture in her heart and leaving scented candles behind.
See, men cheat like they’re ordering fast food: quick, messy, paper bag in the passenger seat, regret already kicking in before they even hit the driveway.

Women cheat like they’re opening a five-star catering business. Menu planned, flavors tested, dietary restrictions noted. Everything intentional. Michelin-star precision.
And that’s why it’s never the same thing.

A dude will have a side chick and forget her birthday, her middle name, maybe even her face if you give him enough beers.
But when a woman has a side dude?

Oh, she knows his shoe size, his Starbucks order, the name of his childhood cat, the fact that his grandma once made the best sweet potato pie in 1998. That man is engraved in her soul like Wi-Fi password on a fridge magnet.

Men compartmentalize. Women customize.

A man will love his main woman deeply and still be out here playing checkers with a side chick for nothing but ego points.

Meanwhile, when a woman gets a side dude?
Bro, you are in danger.
You might still be her “main,” but in reality, you’re the substitute teacher she’s using to kill time until she can transfer schools permanently.

So no, it’s not the same thing. You can cry about it, write essays about double standards, start a Twitter thread, scream into your pillow it won’t change the truth.

Men cheat with their bodies. Women cheat with their hearts.
And let me tell you something: hearts don’t come back once they’ve packed their bags.
At the end of the day:

A man’s side chick is a distraction.

A woman’s side dude is a promotion.

We are not the same. Accept it… or cry yourself into a motivational podcast about “self-love and healing.

WEIRD thoughts

03/10/2025

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