16/05/2025
If he truly loves you, he will love everything about you
"I got married in 2020. Was I happy? Yes, of course, very happy. We all know how single mothers are viewed in society. I must confess that I was very scared & worried that I might not find someone who would accept me & my baby.
When my baby's father abandoned me at two months pregnant, I was an orphan but living with my aunt's direct younger sister to my mother. Life was hard, but one thing was certain: abortion was a no-no. I made up my mind to keep my baby, even if it meant I had to beg for food. Luckily enough, my aunt was very supportive, both emotionally & financially, from her small salary as a nursery school teacher. She kept the promise she made to my mom on her dying bed, six hours after she gave birth to me, promising to raise me as her own, & she has always done just that.
Well, I gave birth & resumed my education when my child was 2 as advised by my aunt Fast-forward i became a registered nurse with a very good & satisfying salary, & I love my job very much. When I met my husband, it was love at first sight. We dated for about 4 months, & he proposed, even though my aunt tried to kick against it, according to her, it was too soon, but love & excitement wouldn't allow me to listen. My baby was 6 yrs old
Just 6 months after our wedding, my job suddenly became a problem. My husband was on my neck every single day, asking me to quit my job. At first, I thought he was joking or just worried about me being exhausted from work & taking care of our home & my child. But his persistence grew stronger each day. "I'm your husband now; I should be providing for you," he'd say. "I & our future kids need you at home full-time," he'd claim.
My aunt, who had initially opposed our marriage due to its swift pace, warned me & would often say, "He wants to control you." In fact, I felt trapped between loving my job, loving my husband, & loving my family's concerns. One day, he gave me an ultimatum: "Choose: your career or our marriage." My heart raced, but I never said a word; I just kept going to my job as if nothing was wrong. But suddenly, he changed & started keeping late nights & sleeping out; I just got frustrated. This went on for like 3 months until I finally gave in after he started cheating on me with different girls. The frustration was too much to bear.
One thing for sure was that, aside from the fear that I might not find another man who would love me & accept my daughter as his in the future, I also loved my husband with everything in me. So, as expected, I quit my job just to keep my husband & marriage. But quitting my job was the worst decision I ever made. My husband's attitude became even worse - he barely came home, & when he did, he would yell at me for being idle. He started starving me of food & affection, leaving me weak & hopeless. Most times, he slept out for days, leaving nothing behind & also not minding how my child & I were coping.
I was a shadow of my former self, a registered nurse turned prisoner in her own home. My daughter was my only comfort, but even she was kept away from me. My aunt took her to stay with her. The only time that i felt comfort was when i usually sneak out to see my child, my husband has stoped me from going out without his permission nor go to my aunt's place. Those moments i sneaked out to see my daughter were my only joy. However, I got to my limits; I was done & tired. I finally found the strength to escape the very toxic marriage. I filed for divorce & started rebuilding my life.
Months later, I met David - my soulmate, my best friend, my everything. He loved me for who I was, & all. He admired my career as a nurse & encouraged me to go back to work. We got married, had 2 more beautiful kids, & relocated to Canada for better opportunities. Today, I look at my happy family & thank God for delivering me from darkness into love & light. I also appreciate my aunt for being a true family & a mother. I'm greatful. Nancy my first child is with my aunt back home, she wouldn't allow me take her, those two are so fond of each other.. but she'll be joining us by next yr.
Well, To all the ladies out there, my story teaches one lesson: never quit your job for a man. If he truly loves you, he'll love all of you, career & children included, & want you to be happy & fulfilled"
