Presh Stories

24/07/2025

THE LANDLORD THAT SOLD HIMSELF

Episode 20 – The Night Mama Cynthia Locked Her Room… And Forgot Her Baby Inside

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Peace don return small.
Mosquito even started greeting us again.

But that night?

We almost broke down door with prayer and confusion.

It all started at 7:43pm.

Mama Cynthia wore wrapper, tied scarf like soldier going war.

She rushed out, shouting:

> “I forget something! I forget something!”

We thought it was pepper on fire.
Or pot on gas.

Only for her to scream:

> “My pikin dey inside! I lock am inside! Jesus!!!”

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Ehehn.

Fear gripped compound.

Ngozi drop her corn.
Uncle Dele remove slippers to run faster.
Even Baba Success forgot his Bible verse.

The baby was barely one year old.
Quiet child.
Didn’t even cry.

But now?
We started hearing small “ehh ehn” from inside.

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Mama Cynthia collapse on floor.

> “Jehovah I’m finished!! Break the door!!”

But the door be like bank vault.
Iron rod plus padlock plus her husband’s "security innovation."

Baba Success tried prayer:

> “Lord, send Angel Michael to open—”

Mama Peace shout:

> “Oga, shift!”

Uncle Dele brought hammer.

Chukwudi came with cutlass.

Why?

Nobody knows.

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They tried everything.

Hammer.
Screwdriver.
Even spiritual tongue.

Door no gree.

Till Mama Gift whisper:

> “The window na slide… make we try.”

Two boys scaled wall.
Removed curtain.
One squeezed inside through small gap.

He passed baby out like he was smuggling gold from Dubai.

We clapped.

Mama Cynthia cried, rolled, hugged everyone, even kissed Chukwudi by mistake.

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By 9pm?

Baby drank two cups of water, burped, and slept like landlord.

As for the door?

Still locked.

Till today.
.. To be continued!

24/07/2025

THE LANDLORD THAT SOLD HIMSELF

Episode 19 – The Day Chukwudi Declared Himself Compound President (With Zero Election)

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Power dey sweet.

But Chukwudi’s own?
It shocked everybody.

One morning, he just wake up…
Print banner.

Hang am on gate:

> “Welcome to Peace Estate”
— Under the Leadership of Hon. Chukwudi Ikenna Esq, Compound President & Spiritual Overseer.

Wait.
Spiritual Overseer too?

Nobody voted.
Nobody campaigned.

The only campaign he did was buy gala and Zobo for small children.

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He called for “compound address” by 7pm.

Arranged white plastic chairs.

Used Mama Cynthia’s extension wire for microphone (that didn’t work).

Then climbed wooden stool.

Cleared throat.

And began:

> “As your president, I bring good news—”

Mama Gift cut in:

> “Who vote you, bros?!”

He continued:

> “Under my administration, no more early morning sweeping! We go hire cleaners from next street.”

Mama Peace:

> “With which money?”

Chukwudi winked.

> “Compound levy go settle am.”

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We laughed.

Till he brought out plastic file.

Inside?
Contribution list:

Maintenance fee – ₦2,000

Streetlight tax – ₦1,000

Soakaway rehabilitation fund – ₦1,500

Presidential logistics – ₦800

Presidential what?

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Baba Success, sitting at the back with Bible and no honour, shouted:

> “Let me be vice president!”

Someone threw pure water at him.

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Next morning?

Banner was torn.
Chukwudi’s seat was missing.
One shoe left at center of compound.

He still insisted he wasn’t removed.

> “It’s just a military coup. I will return in 2027.”

Till now, we still call him “Mr President.”

Just to mock him.

He still dey wear suit on Saturday.
.. To be continued!

24/07/2025

THE LANDLORD THAT SOLD HIMSELF

Episode 18 – The Day Tenants Dragged Mama Peace to Court for Overcharging Rent

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Yes.
It finally happened.

After months of complaints…
Whispers…
Secret meetings under the guava tree…

We dragged Mama Peace to court.

Small court o.
But it felt big.

Like Avengers vs Thanos.

Only this time, Thanos wore wrapper and said,

> “I no fear lawyer.”

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It all started when she increased rent again.

From ₦80,000 to ₦150,000.

Mama Cynthia shouted:

> “For where?! For this compound wey rat get voting power?”

Uncle Dele added:

> “Even soakaway dey protest, madam.”

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A tenants’ meeting was held.

Ngozi brought legal advice she downloaded from Google.

Chukwudi, who now claims to be “Assistant Landlord Welfare Coordinator,” suggested we form group.

Group name?

> “Tenants Union for Justice and Proper Soakaway Affairs.”

We clapped.

Action began.

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We carried Mama Peace to court.

All of us wore matching clothes.

(Okay, not matching-matching… but we tried.)

Mama Peace entered courtroom with pride.

She represented herself.

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Judge asked:

> “Why did you increase rent by almost 100%?”

Mama Peace answered:

> “Because the compound now has new spiritual value.”

Judge blinked.

> “Come again?”

She continued:

> “Since I won court case, buried idol for peace, and drove out fake soldiers… the compound is now holy ground. Rent must reflect anointing.”

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The courtroom paused.

Even the clerk typed slower.

One of the tenants started speaking in tongues, just to match the madness.

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Judge sighed.

Looked at us.
Then at her.

Final verdict?

> “You have two options:

1. Restore old rent.

2. Relocate tenants to real holy ground. Like Redemption Camp.”

Mama Peace hissed.

But rent was dropped.

We won.

Slightly.

---

That night?

She removed soakaway lid.

Let the smell rise.

As protest.

We didn’t sleep.

Because in Nigeria?

Even when you win…
You must suffer small first.
.. To be continued!

22/07/2025

HE LEFT HIS WIFE FOR A RICH WOMAN… WHAT SHE DID NEXT BROKE EVERYONE’S HEART

When your husband leaves you for someone richer… what would you do?

This woman’s reaction shocked everyone.

💔 This is not the story you expect.

Watch till the end.

22/07/2025

THE LANDLORD THAT SOLD HIMSELF

Episode 17 – The Night Baba Success Was Caught Selling Compound Sand

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You think you’ve seen all?

No.

Because hunger has creativity.

And Baba Success?

He invented a new hustle:

He started selling compound sand.

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Let me explain.

After losing everything — house, church, even fake congregation — Baba Success said hunger wouldn’t disgrace him.

So, late at night, he began packing sand from behind Mama Peace’s house…
Putting it inside cement bags.

By morning?

He carried the bags outside gate and waited for customers.

His price?

₦500 per bag.

Reason?

> “This land get ancestral blessings. Whoever plant with this sand go harvest fast.”

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First person to catch him?

Mama Gift’s son.

He saw Baba Success dragging sand at 2AM.

Told his mama.

By 6AM, entire compound gathered.

Mama Peace confronted him:

> “Why are you selling my ground?!”

Baba Success tried to explain:

> “Technically, na your house. But the sand dey under the house. That’s underground property. I own that one.”

Even Chukwudi hissed.

Ngozi said:

> “You need psychiatric sand, sir.”

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Police came (again).

Baba Success spent 24 hours in cell (again).

This time, police officers greeted him:

> “Our regular customer don come back.”

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By evening?

Mama Peace issued public warning:

> “From now on, anybody seen touching sand, stone, cement, or even dust in this compound will face shrine.”

Baba Success sat quietly.

No longer pastor.
No longer landlord.
Now just man.

A man with no hope… but plenty shame.

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As for me?

I sweep sand into my room.

Because in this house, you never know who might try to sell the corridor next.
.. To be continued!

22/07/2025

THE LANDLORD THAT SOLD HIMSELF

Episode 16 – The Return of the Yahoo Boy With Fake Soldiers

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Just when we thought peace had finally entered compound…

The Yahoo boy buyer returned.

Remember him?

The first person Baba Success sold the house to.

He came back.

This time…

With two soldiers.

Or so we thought.

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Monday morning, gate burst open.

Yahoo boy marched in.

Behind him?

Two men in full camouflage.

Boots.

Sunglasses.

One even carried empty water bottle like gr***de.

They entered compound, shouting:

> “Everybody OUT! This house now belongs to government!”

Mama Gift screamed.

Mama Peace ran inside to bring wrapper.

Baba Success tried to join soldiers until they shouted at him too.

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Chukwudi asked small voice:

> “Wait… which government?”

Yahoo boy smiled:

> “Federal. I bought it officially now.”

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Soldiers entered each room.

Uncle Dele’s TV? Seized.

Mama Cynthia’s mattress? Carried.

Even my own fan? Disconnected.

They claimed:

> “Operation Clearance.”

Mama Peace came outside.

Calm.

Looked at the so-called soldiers.

Looked at Yahoo boy.

And whispered:

> “You go explain.”

She called police.

Real police.

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Twenty minutes later?

Fake soldiers caught.

How?

One forgot to remove “NATIONAL YOUTH SERVICE CORPS” tag from boot.

They were yahoo boy’s cousins.

They confessed.

He paid them ₦15,000 each to “act soldier.”

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Yahoo boy tried to escape.

Baba Success tripped him.

Police carried all of them.

Mama Peace collected back mattress, TV, and my fan.

She whispered:

> “Any drama in this compound now… I collect breath.”

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By nightfall, compound calm again.

For now.

Because as we know…

Peace in this house dey expire fast.
.. To be continued!

22/07/2025

THE LANDLORD THAT SOLD HIMSELF

Episode 15 – The Day Baba Success Opened Another Church… Inside Mama Peace’s Kitchen

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After losing court case…
After spending two nights in police cell…
After failing to steal the land document…

Baba Success did the next logical thing.

He opened another church.

Where?

Inside Mama Peace’s kitchen.

Yes.
Kitchen.

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Here’s how it started.

Mama Peace travelled for weekend.

Left her big padlocked kitchen closed.

Baba Success, still squatting inside the compound, noticed opportunity.

By midnight, he broke the kitchen padlock.

By morning, he had rearranged the place:

Yam pestle became pulpit.

Mortar became altar.

Kerosene stove? Prayer stand.

Frying pan? Offering bowl.

And the name?

> “Fire For Fire Deliverance Kitchen Ministries.”

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Tenants woke up to drums and prayer:

> “Oh Lord! Fry my enemies like plantain! Burn their destinies like small chops!”

Mama Gift peeped through kitchen window.

She shouted:

> “JESUS! Baba Success dey hold service beside pot of soup!”

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By 8AM, congregation gathered.

Who were they?

Chukwudi (yes, pepper seller turned landlord turned choir master).

Three random okada men who said “church na church.”

And one woman who claimed God led her there after NEPA disconnected her light.

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When Mama Peace returned?

She caught them mid-sermon.

Baba Success was shouting:

> “Your enemies will scatter like egusi on Sunday afternoon!”

Mama Peace fainted.

For real.

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She woke up.
Removed her slippers.

And flogged Baba Success out of her kitchen.

Chukwudi tried to explain:

> “Mama, it’s not ordinary kitchen anymore. It’s sanctuary.”

She flogged him too.

No explanation.

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Baba Success spent night outside gate.

Praying.

Not for deliverance.

But for forgiveness.

And possibly… new accommodation.
.. To be continued!

20/07/2025

STORY; THE BOY WHO GREW UP IN THE ROOM BEHIND THE SHOP

20/07/2025

Title: “The Sunday Rice That Destroyed My Reputation”

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Sunday afternoon.
Peaceful day. Breeze dey blow. NEPA surprise us with light since morning. Life dey balance.
Mummy don announce after church: “Rice and stew dey this afternoon!”
Everyone happy. Joy enter my body. Because Sunday rice na national promise.

I dey parlour dey watch African Magic, dey wait.
Then mummy shout from kitchen:
“Who go wash pot?!”

Na there I know say my problem just start.

I try pretend say I no hear. I dey press phone like say I dey reply email.
Next thing, my junior brother shout:
“Mummy, na bros dey free!”

Betrayal. Judas Iscariot spirit dey inside this boy.

Mummy drag me enter kitchen.
“Wash pot. Fast. If you no wash am, rice no go cook.”

Na so I dey scrub big pot wey dem use boil beans two days ago. Beans stain wey stubborn pass my landlord.

Finally, I finish. Rice enter fire. Joy return small.

30 minutes later, the smell of rice and stew don fill compound.
My stomach dey sing. My mind dey picture mountain of rice with two mighty meats on top.

Then wahala happen.

Mummy share food.

My plate land.

I look am.

Two and half spoons of rice. No meat. Stew like dem rub am with cotton wool.

I pause.

I ask gently:
“Mummy, is this sample or the actual food?”

She hiss:
“You, wey dey hide when dem dey cook. You wan chop pass people?”

I say, “But I washed the pot na.”

She reply:
“Are you the only child I born? If I follow who wash pot, your papa no go see food.”

Tears gather for my eye. Hunger dey shout inside me.

As I dey force swallow that small rice, my junior brother dey beside me with full plate. Two meat. Stew plenty. He dey lick finger.

I say: “Junior, you wash pot?”

He say, “No.”

I say, “You pound pepper?”

He say, “No.”

I say, “Then why—”

He cut me short:
“Mummy say na who sabi humble dey get plenty.”

I weak.

As I dey lament, Daddy enter.
He see my plate. He laugh.

“Your problem be say you get pride. I tell your mummy make she reduce your portion. Life no dey give big food to people wey form boss.”

After I chop finish, my hunger still dey alive.
I carry plate go back to kitchen like houseboy.

Mummy look me:
“You want extra?”

I nod, like person wey dem catch stealing meat.

She say:
“Oya, go fetch water for me.”

And na so I end up in backyard, drawing water with hunger, regret, and rice inside throat wey no get backup.

Since that day, I learned:

In Nigerian houses,
Sunday rice no be for everybody.
Na who sabi eye service dey chop full plate.

20/07/2025

THE LANDLORD THAT SOLD HIMSELF

Episode 12 – The Night Someone Tried to Steal the Land Document

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Midnight.

Compound silent.

Even Chukwudi’s pepper grinding machine no make sound.

Mama Peace slept with the land document under her pillow.

Suddenly…

CREAK.

Her door handle turned slowly.

Someone was trying to enter.

Mama Peace, old but sharp, woke instantly.

She whispered:

> “Holy Ghost… hold the thief.”

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She waited.

Door opened slightly.

A hand stretched in.

Mama Peace jumped up.

With what?

Her mortar pestle.

She slammed the intruder’s hand.

> “Yeeeh! My hand! My hand!”

Voice sounded familiar.

She switched on torchlight.

Who was it?

Baba Success.

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Caught like rat.

Wearing bathroom slippers.

Eyes red.

Mama Peace screamed:

> “Jesus! You again?!”

Baba Success knelt immediately.

> “Sister Peace, abeg! I wasn’t stealing! I just came to check if the document dey safe!”

Mama Peace used mop to flog him like school principal.

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By morning, entire compound knew.

Baba Success had tried to steal the land paper.

His reason?

> “The Spirit led me to confirm ownership.”

Ngozi snapped:

> “Spirit go lead you to prison.”

Even Chukwudi said:

> “Oga, you don fall my hand.”

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Mama Peace reported him to police.

Baba Success spent the night in cell… again.

But before police carried him, he shouted one final prophecy:

> “This house will not know peace until I return as rightful owner!”

Police slapped him for noise pollution.

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As I speak, court date dey set.

Mama Peace holds the document.

And Baba Success?

He’s in police cell composing gospel songs.

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.. To be continued!

20/07/2025

THE LANDLORD THAT SOLD HIMSELF

Episode 11 – When Mama Peace Found the Original Land Document Inside Wrapper

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One hot Thursday afternoon, Mama Peace sat quietly under the mango tree.

No shouting.
No threats.
No chasing Chukwudi with mop stick.

She just dey think.

Then she remembered something strange.

Twenty years ago, when her mother died, Mama Peace tied some old papers inside a wrapper… and kept it somewhere safe.

Too safe.

So safe, she forgot where.

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Suddenly, she stood up like person wey Holy Spirit slap.

She rushed inside her old room.

Under her bed.

Inside a cracked metal box.

She opened it.

Wrapper dey there.

She untied the wrapper…

And found the ORIGINAL LAND DOCUMENT.

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Not photocopy.

Not faded agreement.

Not shrine certificate.

The real thing.

Her father’s signature.
Government stamp.
And the map showing the exact land dem dey fight over.

Mama Peace screamed.

> “JESUS!!!”

Entire compound gathered.

Baba Success shouted:

> “Who die?!”

Mama Peace ran outside, holding the document like newborn baby.

> “I FOUND IT!!!”

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Chukwudi, confused, asked:

> “Found what? New landlord?”

Mama Peace slapped his head.

> “Original document, fool!”

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Ngozi, on seeing the paper, nearly cried:

> “My God.
This is the document that ends this case.”

Even Baba Success went silent.

For the first time, he whispered:

> “Maybe Holy Ghost dey work… through wrapper.”

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By evening, Mama Peace locked herself in her room.

Guarded the document like national treasure.

Compound now quiet.

Because the next court hearing?

Everything go end.

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But as night came…

Someone tried to break into Mama Peace’s room.

Who?

Nobody knows.

But the document was almost stolen.

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.. To be continued!

19/07/2025

I finished as #4 on the leaderboard. Thanks for following along!

Last night, I was walking home, looking sharp—fresh cut, clean shirt, that kind of walk that says “I sabi myself.”
I was minding my peaceful business when I saw this girl—black gown, slippers, looking like she just borrowed confidence from her friend.

She stop me, small talk start. Vibes normal.
Then she say, “I feel like eating suya.”
I say, “No wahala, follow me reach make I pick something, then we go.”

Na there entitlement spirit rise.
She pause, fold arm like headmistress.
“You want to pick something first? So I should follow you around? Let’s just go and buy the suya.”

Huh?
On top my own money, you dey give presidential command? You wan chop suya but you dey control logistics?
I just laugh internally.

This life no balance.
Broke girl wey dey find meat wey dem grill with fire, dey move like queen wey no get throne.
I just smile, say, “Okay nah.” I turn face and waka go pick wetin I wan pick.

No be say you even get yansh sef.
But na you dey form Queen of Shaki Republic.

One thing I know?
If your hunger pass your home training, na garri go humble you las las.

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