Chioma Ugwudi Nwigwe

15/12/2024

Life is too short to spend it on endless complaints. Also, Life doesn't give you what you deserve, it gives you what you fight for.

Fight for your life ! Fight for your happiness! Fight for your future!

This is my motto and my point of difference and I have been that way since I was 11 years.

Whatever I don't like about my life, I change it instantly and speedily.

At age 11, immediately I returned from my one month boarding school, I stopped my mom from washing my clothes for me, by simply removing them from the washing basket before she picks it up the next morning.

I was placed in boarding school at 11 years, I hated it ( bad food, senior girls punishing you without a reason, dirty toilets and bathroom with maggots), and I wrote my dad 30 letters until he came and bundled me off ( I still remember that afternoon in princy's office). He told the Principal - I can no longer sleep after reading how my daughter is suffering in your school. After that experience, I cannot send any child of mine to a Nigerian boarding school!

I got admission into the University of Nigeria to study soil science because I didn't meet the cut off for medicine ( everyone advised my parents to put me in the university for any course at all while I work on rewriting Jamb), I couldn't imagine myself in Agric department because that was the only subject that earned me a credit in waec 7As and ICredit ( that credit was Agric). After my first year, despite the fact that I was told the department wouldn't release any students since no one wanted to study Agric, I walked into every top office in that university including the Vice chancellor( both for admin and academics), all the lecturers, the HOD, name it until they signed me off from that department ( but again, I was young and ignorant, Agric is one of the best courses to study if you know what to do with it)

After graduating from the University and everyone ( including my parents) was telling me how I would be jobless because I studied microbiology, I challenged them and said instead of me to be jobless, I would go and pick up a job at the bank ( I was only 24 years when I said this. After my Msc, my first job was in the bank, I got exactly what I fought for - after over 1000 job applications ( not kidding).

When I got into the bank, in my third year, I was bullied out of my job in a very interesting way ( instead of my promotion which I was due for, I was asked to resign)- I will yet share this story 🙂 someday - I have never told this story , but I got it back through going back to get an explanation ( from the Regional Manager, to the Executive Director of my division and then to HR) and was eventually recalled to my job.

These are just a few of my life fights, I have plenty more not listed here ( it will need a book📚). Right now, I am currently fighting one battle and will also overcome as usual through proven process and strategies that I have developed over the years.

Why am I sharing these with you? - to challenge you, to inspire you and to encourage you!

To let you know that whatever you allow is allowed and whatever you don't like about your life, you have the POWER to change it instantly and immediately - you happiness is your choice 😻.

The devil is not your problem, inaction and comfort zone mentality is the problem.

30/11/2024

Inspired by the death of the 25-year-old lady
After I graduated from the University of Nigeria, Nsukka, many years ago, my dad, who had promised to send me abroad for further studies, chickened out of the deal because of a funny misunderstanding I had with him and told me that I was free to get married, that my husband would continue from where he stopped.
As I was not the typical Nigerian girl who allows anything to happen to them, I started packing my bags to head for Lagos as soon as I could raise the money for myself and begin my life by myself, when my mom stepped in and told me not to take to heart the hurtful words from my dad and that she was ready to sponsor me to go for a further degree in any Nigerian University (as she could not afford to send me abroad for further studies at that time).
This was how I ended up at the University of Ibadan for my first MSc program. The rest is history; from that point onwards till date-, I took FULL charge of my life. Before that MSc program ended , I got myself a job in the bank, and the rest is history -I have been taking care of MYSELF to this day.
I am proud to say that before I got married ( or joined myself to a man), I had achieved the following for MYSELF without the support of any man - I mean any human being who identifies himself as a man.
1. A second degree ( supported by my mom)
2. A good and well-paying job - (powered by me myself and me, no connections)
3. Travelled to at least one foreign country twice - the UK (self-sponsored)
4. Had some investments and properties (self-sponsored)
5. Had some side hustles as much as time could permit
5. paying my rent in an apartment in Lagos (self-sponsored) and extra to support my siblings/ anyone if and when they had need
6. Developing myself in all sorts of courses and trainings (self-sponsored)
7. Working towards a better life and exploring the prospects of relocation
8. The day my dad visited me in Lagos at my apartment, he told me that he was proud of me and was happy with my achievements ( at least he did not allow his ego to take the better side of him)
9. I had bought myself "respect" from every angle with my achievements for myself, including those who believed I was going to end up as good for nothing 😂
All these were going on in my life before anything called man came into my life. And I am sharing this because if I could do it, anyone could because, as you can see from that list, most of these things were done by me, myself and I, without a dime from any man, and it was not luck, grace, special prayers from any prophets or divine favors. There was nothing special about me. It all had to do with determination, self-belief and drive to make my life better for myself.
I brought in this story to say this:
1. It is absolute irresponsibility on the part of any parent to send off your girl child for marriage if you have not equipped her for life.
Now, please note this: my dad was a great man, and he did his best for us as his children, but he was simply a traditional Nigerian man who believed in most of the things men believe, such as looking at the girl-child as that one who should be minimally trained and will end up someday in a man's house.
I am happy I had an empowered mom who changed that for me - she is one of my inspirations to date! Because she has continued to be that role model even in her old age of 70's.
So please, let us all aspire to become empowered women so we and our daughters will not be at the mercy of the words of our husbands or men in our lives.
This is because most men weaponise money 💰
One question to ask yourself - if your husband says he won't take care of your kids right now, can you do it by yourself. That is how to gauge yourself!

17/11/2024

Celebrating 🎊 our own

22/10/2024

I NO BETTER PASS MY NEIGHBOR MINDSET!

Thought for today: There's a question I want every woman to reflect on today as this also guides me in everything I do- if anything happens between you and your husband today or if he dies off, can you cope alone with those kids or you will become a nuisance and start harassing everyone that you are a single mom?

A lot of times, I think many Nigerian women are not smart in making decisions because they don't have a holistic approach to life or their judgement have become beclouded by religion. I have tried to talk to a few but I have realized that many prefer to learn in the fire. Whether we like to hear it or not, the reality is that in marriage, some might eventually part ways or some will die and this has nothing to do with God forbid. You are not being realistic if you feel that God will forbid it for you but won't forbid it for another person. Normalize thinking about some of these things because those it happened to, you are not better than them neither are you more prayerful or you think God loves you more? Situations do occur in life, that is the reason why, in order to pass any interview abroad, you must speak to situations that you met and how you handled those situations.

As a woman, you always need to think about these things and always prepare for the evil day. Most women don't think or plan for some situations which is why they go into the marriage and drop their brains for the man, and eventually when or if anything goes south, they are devastated and calling for rescue or hiding their identities ( are you a masquerade? 😂)

I am a very practical person and extremely very intentional at what I do. When I was working at the bank in Nigeria, alot of the rich men I was managing their accounts for then didn't have their wife's names as next of kin. Infact, hardly did I meet any man who filled out his wife's details as the next of kin then. It was either their mom or brother. Then one of them died, the whole family moved into her home and started dragging properties with her. This happened in my presence because I was managing that account and I met them ( the mom and three brothers) the day they came to the bank to ask about the late man's account. Knowing what was going on, I and my business manager put measures in place to protect the woman and ensured she got a good lawyer to deal with the issue. She had 4 little children then who were all in primary and nursery then.

The reason I don't have more than two children today, is not because I am infertile o 😆😆. Infact it should have been one child, was because I want to be sure that I can always take care of any child I have single handedly in the event that "gbege" occurs any day. Then you see some women - I am working on a target , my husband said it will be six, or seven - ,4 boys and 2 girls. Okay now, please when gbege happens, please make sure you know exactly what to do because it is an unsmart way to live.

20/09/2024

25/12/2023

Wishing you all a Merry Christmas and a prosperous new year

27/09/2023

Happiness is free.

24/09/2023

I am a firm believer in the fact that the more empowered women we have in the world, the better, saner and happier the world would be.

27/08/2023

Yesterday, after a brief chat with a female Nigerian lady. I understood exactly why many people cannot be successful at what they set out to achieve because they don't have the energy I saw exuding from her. They are unwilling to pay the price.

This lady concluded her first and second degree; her CV is on point, she has an active LinkedIn profile, has completed a tech program, is currently volunteering for an organization, is learning and updating her skills on Coursera, has applied for Mandela Washington fellowship, and a second opportunity she found online, is looking for scholarship opportunities abroad for PhD. The only thing I could fault her was that she needed to step up her job-hunting game by throwing in at least ten applications daily. I also asked her to send me her resume so I could speak to a few friends on her behalf. I love to help focused and serious-minded people like her.

Her restlessness reminded me about myself years back and my doggedness to get things done today that I could have procrastinated tomorrow. I don't wait till tomorrow to do what I must conclude today, and I don't work well with procrastinators.

My dear friends, time waits for no one. As I am typing these things, I am sitting somewhere, planning and strategizing for the new week and the things I need to get done.

If you want any magic to happen in your life, the only way is to put in the work. Find time and put in the work. Stop wasting time on non-essential and mundane activities. There is simply no other way. God will not do your work; angels won't do it; speaking in tongues from now till eternity won't get it done; even the devil is not stopping you. You are the only one stopping yourself. Just know this!

Have a lovely day!

23/08/2023

I don't need to wait till tomorrow to start what I could have completed today.

Make every second count!

21/08/2023

I've just reached 8K followers! Thank you for continuing support. I could never have made it without each one of you. 🙏🤗🎉