17/02/2026
Today I don’t even know the best way to say this, but I want to talk about systems.
These systems are built so subtly, so subconsciously, that we don’t even realize when we’ve sunk deep inside them. They shape our thinking without asking for permission.
I’ve always considered myself a feminist(a proud one 😌). I didn’t even sit down one day and choose it, I just grew into it as a teenage girl, navigating life and seeing things for what they were.
A few days ago, I was in a discussion with some girls in school. One of them was really upset about the attitude of a certain lecturer towards her. Funny thing is, I’ve had my own encounter with that same lecturer, and honestly, I would describe her as diplomatic in fact a perfect Boss in her own way.
But because we wanted to support our friend, the conversation shifted. Then someone casually mentioned that the lecturer isn’t married (She should be in her late 50s).
And just like that, we grabbed onto that one point and felt satisfied 🤢 as if marriage is some kind of reward. As if that one detail invalidated her competence🤦🏻
Mind you this woman in question is at the top of her game, one of the highest in her field and yet with we had the audacity to belittle her over a man😭(all of us haven’t achieved nothing, not one compared to her😞)
In that moment, I felt archaic 👵I felt small🤦🏻What is the essence of all my education if my reasoning can still fall into that trap? I wasn’t even brave enough to challenge the statement. I just kept quiet.
And that’s when it hit me 🤦🏻 it’s a system.
There are so many harmful systems we don’t question. We judge people just to feel superior. We don’t want to dismantle anything, yet we have loud mouths to criticize👩⚖️
We’re the first to chant “suicide is not an option,” but we’re unwilling to fix the systems that suffocate people. There’s so much decay the patriarchal system, the matriarchal system, the parental system, the work system, the love system… the list is endless.
Sometimes we think we’re woke, but we’re still products of the same broken structure.
And that realization? Yes that realization! It’s humbling😔
