22/01/2026
Refined Narrative
​"I have a friend who completely disconnects whenever she faces difficult situations. Over the years, we’ve had several 'timeouts' where she becomes totally withdrawn. She explained that this is her coping mechanism, and I have respected it, though I often wondered why I would be part of the things she cut off when feels overwhelmed, when all we ever do is talk and never ask anything else from each other." I wondered this because in these episodes I still see her traces online participating in posts of her interest. 😂
Does my energy overwhelm her too?" i wondered. So for me to cope with that, I concluded that my life's perspectives must be something she disagrees with but probably too polite to let me know " an excuse I made for her out of care. So I stopped 'chasing' her or trying to fix our communication problems, choosing instead to wait for her to come around and listen whenever she is ready to talk. This has been working for us because once she switches back, I am always on standby to continue from where we stopped , without judgement.
I am the opposite. When I feel vulnerable, I reach out to talk and appreciate it when people check in on me during my down times not necessarily to talk about the issues at hand, but such times aren't really time I want to isolate and sink into low vibration. unless of course you are a source of my stress or I identify you as a trigger for negative energy, since it's important to me to amplify my vibration in such a time.
Recently, while she was in one of her withdrawal episodes, I had a domestic accident that left me briefly immobile. I didn’t explicitly tell anyone ,because my entire focus was on treatment and healing. Those who found out were simply the people who called regularly; I didn’t make a special effort to inform 'non-regular' callers, as it wasn't relevant to my recovery.
A months later, when we finally spoke, she was shocked and expressed sympathy. She apologized and reminded me again that withdrawal is how she copes. However, less than two weeks later, she withdrew again for another two months. All the while, I was still battling my physical pain. When she finally decided to call me last December, I missed her call twice in a space of days, given to some issues I was having with my phone at that period
She immediately sent an angry text asking how I 'dare' ignore her, asking if I didn't see her calls" without even knowing what I had been going through or giving me benefits of the doubts
It is frustrating that she took offense at the first missed call without wondering if I was okay, I mean did she totally forget my health status the last time we spoke? Hmmmmm!. For the first time in our relationship I identify the issue of " Lack of Object constancy"
Now, Why do some people think they are the only ones who matter, assuming others are just designed to wait for them?" Why do you feel you are the only one with challenges while other people's lives are so perfect? Why the main character syndrome? If you expect people to understand that you have periods you rather stay by yourself, why try to control the pace at which people respond to you . Why not consider that when you are finally ready to talk might be the time the next person is going into solitude 😂. Why the double standard if approved of such method?
Read the first comment to ​Discover Reasons for Her "Audacity" no 4 is very crucial .
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