29/05/2026
Title: “Abba Community Meeting Wahala"
As a village town crier enter started informing indigenous that a goat has been missing
Chairman Okoro:
My people, this emergency meeting is about the missing goat of Mama Chioma.
Mama Chioma:
Chairman, that goat is not ordinary goat o! That goat understands English. If you say “come,” it will come.
Emeka:
Mama, maybe the goat traveled to Owerri for greener grass.
Mama Chioma:
Emeka, don’t joke with me. Since morning, even my husband is looking innocent. I don’t trust him.
Pastor Ibe:
Let us handle this spiritually. Sometimes goats disappear because of village enemies.
Youth Leader Chibuzor:
Pastor, last month your own chicken disappeared and we later saw it inside your soup pot.
(Everybody laughs.)
Pastor Ibe:
That one was a miracle of provision.
Chairman Okoro:
Silence! Did anybody see the goat last?
Small boy from crowd:
Yes sir. I saw the goat near Chief Nnadozie’s compound yesterday.
Crowd:
Ehhhhhh!
Chief Nnadozie (standing up angrily):
Why is everybody looking at me? Because I sell pepper soup?
Mama Chioma:
Aha! So you have confessed!
Chief Nnadozie:
Confessed what? In this village, anytime goat disappears, everybody suddenly remembers I own a pepper soup joint.
Emeka:
Chief, even your dog is licking its mouth suspiciously.
(Crowd bursts into laughter.)
Chairman Okoro:
Order! Order! Nobody should accuse anybody without evidence.
(Suddenly the missing goat walks into the meeting chewing cassava leaves.)
Mama Chioma:
My goat!
Chairman Okoro:
So where was the goat?
Youth Leader Chibuzor:
Chairman, the goat attended another meeting before coming here.
Pastor Ibe:
This goat is more active in community matters than some youths in Abba.
Chairman Okoro:
From today, the goat will pay development levy too!
D**e