Abd-Basit Olumide

17/07/2024

😂😂😂😂😂🤣

1. Call a man a li0n and he will be very happy. But call him an an!mal he will be very àngry.Is a li0n not an anímal?
😇😇😆😈😈

2. If you know more than five stīngy people, that means you bég a lot..
😂😂😂😂😁😁

3. In Japan a 17yr old is a doçtor.
In Brazil a 17yr old is a footballer.
In India a 17yr old is a shop owner.
In China a 17yr old is an engineer.
In Iraq a 17yr old is a Søldier.
In USA a 17yr old is a celebrity.
In Israel a 17 yr old is a príest.
In Africa a 35yr old is a whatsapp groúp admin.
God why🙆🙆🙆🙆🙎🙎😫

4 In Nigeria a fat guy from a rich family is called BIGGY while a fat guy from a p00r family is called OROBO.
That's where corrúptí0n started.
🤷🏼‍♂🤷🏼‍♂😂😂

5 Once you marry a bàd wife de dev!l will stop followíng you because he has settled you already😌😌😌

6. Sometimes you have to keep forgiving her while you are still looking for someone to replace her.
This is called constructive elíminat!on by substitut!on.
😜😜😜😜😜😜😜😜😜😜
Should i increase the volume?

7. First female barber recorded in the Bible was Delílah..
Féàr Women 😂

8. Bro you're dāting that girl for more than 💁3years, with no intention of marryīng her please..
Uncle phara0h let my si$ter go

9. Who is a ri$k taker?
A ri$k taker is someone who has running st0mach and still want to méss
🏃🏃😁😂🐐

10 *I will never take wééd again 😒.
*I just fínïshed ironíng 25 clothes now and I didn't plug the ir0n.😃😀
Mádoooo 😅😅😅😅😅😅

11. My dear, if a lady asks “how are you” just reply “I am fine”, but if you have møney you can ädd “and you” 😂🚶‍♀️

12. Døn't trüst a girl with only one Facebøok profile picture... She is a boy ! I rëpeat, she is a boy oo 😹😅

13.You are tryíng to go without reaçting 🙄 is not good ooh 😏🤦‍♂️

My name is Abd-Basit Olumide and am best at what i do🙌✍️

PLS FOLLOW MY BACKAbd-Basit Olumide'S GET 10K FOLLOWERS ABEG 🙏😭😭
👇👇👇
Abd-Basit OlumideAbd-Basit Olumide

16/07/2024

🤦‍♀️ LAUGH

1. Men are born between the lëgs of wömen and spend all their life trying to get back between them🙄. Why?.... There’s no place like home ... 🤭😂😂😂😂
2. Who says nothing is impossible. I’ve been doing nothing since morning. 😋😒😂😂😂
3. When a girl cancels a date she cancels it because she has to…🙄 But when a boy cancels a date he cancels it because he has two.😂😂
4. TEACHER: “What do you call someone with no body and a nose?”
ME: Nobody Knows 🙄😒😂😂😂
5. Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up. 🙄😒😂😂
6. Teacher: “What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?”😏
Me: A teacher! 😒🥲😂😂😂
7. I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific. 😩🥲😂😂
8. A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.😇😌
A successful woman is one who can find such a man. 🤭😂😂😂
9. ME AS A DOCTOR 🥲
PATIENT: Doctor! I’m I ügly?😭
ME: You’re not ügly.
PATIENT: But everybody says I’m ügly!😒
ME: Listen, you are not ügly!🤷
PATIENT: I know I’m ügly.😭
ME: You look like a fine, ströng looking man.🙄
PATIENT: But I’m a woman.😟😩😂😂😂
10. ME: “Dad, can you help me find the lowest common denominator in this problem please?”🙏😭
DAD: “Don’t tell me that they haven’t found it yet, I remember looking for it when I was still in school!” 😏😂😂😂

Dearie 🥰, If nobody cares to talk to you, Just know that you have Me🙈, just appreciate your Favourite, by liking THis Post🙏 and following me please follow 🙏👉 THIS PAGE👆👆👆
God bless you abundantly as you do so..

14/07/2024

ANOTHER BANGER👇👇👇
Pls follow page👆Abd-Abd-Basit Olumidean now Laugh😂😂😂🤗🙄
🙆😱😱😱😱😱
1. It's raining and you are telling
somebody's daughter to enter your house,
Are you Noah:/?🙃😅😅
2. My friend has been forcing me to marry
,so that he can take advantage of my wife
while am away ,Since I hate arguing I
married his sister
I serve the living God😎🤣🤣
.
3. And some be asking me what I do
for a living, you think living in Nigeria is a
small job? I live in Nigeria for a living.😹🙃
.
4. In Nigeria, The more dangerous the area
is, the cheaper the Beer😅😅🙆🏾‍♂️
5. Nobody knows how to listen and
interpretes footsteps like Africans having
unfaithful s*x while in the room
LADY: Somebody is coming ??
MAN: No they are going
Bunch of fornucators🙆🏾‍♂️😆😁😁
6. Dear single ladies, When he gives you an
engagement ring, kindly buy him a wrist
watch, Make him too know say time no dey.🙃🙃😹
.
7. I also had to laugh in an interview with a
security guard.
Interviewer: Do you know English and how
to speak fluently.
Job seeker: Will the thieves come from
England?. If there is no job just tell me😮‍💨🤷🏿‍♂️🤷🏿‍♂️
8. As a Nigerian, you should know that its
not all marriages begin with ,"will you
marry me?"
Some begin with,"John I'm pregnant "😋😹😹
9. No woman wants a man who is
everywhere,commenting on every
woman's picture wow wow wow like an
ambulance. Guys.. Get sense🙃😹😹

10. Bro even if you hold her waist from
Nigeria to south Africa, doesn't mean that
she belongs to you, because even Satan is
from Genesis to Revelation but doesn't
belong to the kingdom of God🙌😇.
I'll be back soon famz ❤️❤️🥰

14/07/2024

🤣 Another joke 😆

1.With your bank account right now, where can you
travel to..🤷🤷

2. Whenevër you deçide to tattoø your bf namë on your bødy‚ Just make surë it’s bibliçal namë likë JO1 Yam na or SAMUEL so that when he leavës you... You cän just ädd “16 verse 22” 🤗🤣

3. If a lädy givës you her nümber‚ read it baçk to her with one wrøng digït. If she correçts you... It means she’s actuälly interestëd 😅

4. Nevër take your täll gïrlfriend to the zøo‚ the giraffë might stärt çrushing on her... 😹😀😄

5. Pëople wey usë because of 5O4 do ritüal in 1989 no livë to seë VENZA 😆😂

6. The reasøn why I älways sït nëxt to beautifül ladïes in çhurch is simplë.
What if the Pastor says turn to your neighboür and säy... I LØVE YOU !! 😁🤣

7. A friënd in neëd is a friënd in deëd‚ A friënd with wëed is a friënd I neëd... 🙊😅🏃‍♀️

8. He çalled you sweët and you’re blüshing; something that they usë to büy #10... 🙄😹

9. I told her to mäke tea for me and she saïd that salt has finïshed 😳🤭... Favour plëase drøp my këy for windøw‚ am nøt doïng agäin 🏃‍♀️🙆😄

10. Did you çome for Polo or relatiønship ?
Favour tälk to me na !! 😂💔

11. Don’t be carrïed awäy by hër profilë piçture‚ cheçk her NIN piç‚ that’s her reäl façe 🤣
12. If you tëll him your prøblem and he repliës “So whät are you plannïng to do nøw”🙄 My sister just knøw that you’re datïng one of your prøblem 🏃‍♀️😆😹

13. Gïrls 👧 of nøwadays don’t çry on the däy of their weddïng anymorë 🤷 they have wastëd all the teärs in relatiønships. 😅😂

14. Some gïrls are nøt sërious oo; you are sïngle and you’re walkïng arøund with earpieçe... If a guy çalls you now‚ how wïll you heär ? 🥴🙉🤣

15.Abokï: “Madam Gaskiä 😕🤷
“Nigerïan møthers be likë: “🙄 You no greë sëll 3 for #350 ?? 🙉😂

16.Even slippers have partner, aren't you ashamed of being single 😅😂

17.You are trying to go without reacting 🙄 heaven is far from you 😏🤦‍♂️

18. Follow Abd-Basit Olumide for daily content

-Basit Olumidegeor

14/07/2024

A m@d man saw a brand new car 4x4 car parked in front of a house.

He said "wow the owner of this car is very důmb😒
Simple 4x4 he cannot solve....😉
he then took a støne and wrote on the car =16.

The owner of the car got so and went ahead to spr@y the car new....😍
The m@d man did it again...🙆

The owner was so this time that when he finished spraying he 0rdered them to Write 4x4=16.......😜

This time the m@d man came around. looked at the car, nødded his head, smiled, picked a støne and mark it correct....🙆😂😂😂😂

PLEASE DON'T SCROLL UP WITHOUT LIKING 😔🙏

Cutie, I've Just Made You Smilè Because you desérve to be Happy Always, it really Fit your Beâuty Face, But you Wálking Away From me is Quíte Unfâir🥺😔, Please I'm really Begging you, Let's Just be Amazing Friends together🥰🥰🙏😢😔

Please can you just fóllow my page on facebook, Please I'm Bégging you, Just to folløw my page 🥺🙏😭

My Swéet Lóve 🥰🥺, Please Open My pageand follów😢🙏👉 Abd-Basit OlumideAbd-Basit Olumide

10/07/2024

LAUGHTER

1. I entered TikTok yesterday and logged out immediately. I got a message from Airtel saying “Dear customer na God save you” 🙆😳😂😂
2. May we never have an encounter with a dog that doesn’t fear stones. 🥲
I used all my Jackie Chan moves before I finally apply Temple Run today 😩😳🙉😂😂
3. ME: Baby‚ where are you ?
Favour: Am on my wäay to work‚ my dad is driving me with his Mercedes Benz X-class because his Lexus ES350 is in garage for service. And you dear‚ where are you? ☺️
ME: Well‚ I’m in a Danfo bus sitting behind you. I just wanted to tell you that you shouldn’t pay the conductor‚ I’ve already paid for you 🙄🥱
The passengers burst out into laughter and that’s how she brëak up with me saying I humiliatëd her 😕
Favour shey na my fäult nii ? 🙄😒😂😂😂
4. I was searching for a Job last week and I had an interview yesterday, Boom!! My Ex Favour was the interviewer. 😳😳🙆
Satän only begotten daughter asked me to mention 10 Indian biscuits. 🙄😩🤭😂😂
5. I think Adam is the cause of our failurë in English Language....... 😩🥲
God: Adam‚ where are you ?
Adam: I am nakëd. 🙄🙉😳😂😂
6. Pidgin is the only language where question is mostly the same as the answer 🙄
Question: “Light dey ?”
Answer: “Light dey !” 😒😂😂😂
7. It is only in Nïgeria that some guys will boast with povërty...🙆
Some guys be like: “I have been wearing this belt for 7 years and it is still strong...” 🙉🤭😂😂😂
8. She fell in love with an electrician, now the whole family was shoçked 😳... Una say Wahala be like wetin again? 🤭😂😂😂
9. Dearie, If nobody cares to talk to you, Just know that you have Me🙈, just appreciate your Favourite, by liking His Post🙏 and adding me as your Friend, Love you All 💖

Hope I have Made your Blessed Söul Brightened🥺😢😥

You wanna be My Best Friend right?🙈😢😥

Cutie, I took time to create this jokes pls appreciate by following Abd-Basit Olumide and Abd-Basit OlumideAbd-Basit OlumideAbd-Basit Olumide

07/03/2024

Vin Diesel and Michelle Rodriguez | 2009 vs 2024

07/03/2024