16/08/2026
How to handle in-laws who criticize how you mother 👇
That one cuts deep. "You’re not holding her well" "Why is the baby crying?" "In our time we did it this way"...
It feels like judgment on your heart, not just your parenting.
Let’s breathe. You’re not a bad mum. You’re a mum learning.
3 WAYS TO HANDLE IN-LAWS WHO CRITICIZE
1. THE GRAY ROCK + BOUNDARY SCRIPT
Don’t argue. Don’t explain too much. Keep it short.
- "Thank you for caring. This is what our pediatrician advised." Doctor card ends 80% of debates
- "I appreciate you. We’re trying a different method this time."
- "I hear you. I’ll think about it." Then do what you planned anyway
You don’t owe them a thesis. Just calm + firm.
2. THE TEAM APPROACH
Bring them INTO the solution instead of fighting them.
- "Mummy, can you help me with babywearing the way you did? I want to learn"
- "The doctor said no water till 6 months. Can you help me remind visitors?"
- "You raised amazing kids. Teach me how you did bath time"
When people feel respected, they criticize less.
3. PROTECT YOUR PEACE RULES
- The 24hr rule: Don’t respond when you’re emotional. "Let me think about that and get back to you"
- The Tag-team rule: Let your partner handle their own parents. "Babe, can you talk to your mum about the pap issue?"
- The Exit rule: "I’m going to step outside with baby for a bit" is a full sentence. Leave the room.
WHAT NOT TO DO
1. Don’t JADE: Justify, Argue, Defend, Explain. It just gives them more to criticize.
2. Don’t take it as "they hate me": Most in-laws criticize from fear + "I did it this way and you survived"
3. Don’t change everything: Pick 2-3 non-negotiables. Water before 6 months, sleep safety, etc. The rest? Let small things go.
REMEMBER THIS MAMA:
You and your baby are a team. You’re the expert on YOUR baby.
They raised their kids. Now it’s your turn to raise yours.
Both can be true.
The criticism usually fades after 6-9 months when they see baby is thriving.
Question for you: What’s the 1 thing they criticize you about? Feeding? Sleep? Carrying?
Drop it below and let’s write a script together for that exact situation 👇
You’re doing a good job. A criticized mum is still a loving mum 🤍
