14/09/2025
🔞| Jima'i fasaha ne (S*x is Art)
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Inji Bahaushe yace "Iska tana wahalar da mai kayan kara". Lamarin jima'i a kasar hausa lamari ne da yake baiwa mutane da yawa wahala. Watakila saboda dama shi ba topic bane da ake zancensa openly, ko kuma saboda yadda ake son sa, ba haka ake kokarin sanin iliminsa ba. Kamar yadda fannonin ilimi suke amfani da fasaha ta zamani, haka shima jima'i ba'a bar shi a baya ba. Shi yasa a taken wannan rubutu, nace "S*x is Art"; ma'ana Jima'i fasaha ce.
Wani dan karamin bincike da wasu dalibai su kayi a jami'ar Ilorin ya nunawa cewa Matan Hausawa sune matan da s**a fi kowanne a Nigeria wajen rashin samun gamsuwar jima'i. Kuma hakan ya bayyana karara idan kayi la'akari da feedback da ake samu sak**akon counselling. Mace zata iya cewa maka tayi aure sama da shekara ashirin amma bata taba sanin wani abu wai shi dadin jima'i ba. Wata abinda take iya tunawa idan akayi zancen jima'i shine: experience din zafi, wuya, radadi, azaba, rashin gamsuwa da sauransu. Wasu ma s**an ce ai su basu dauki Jima'i wani abu na nishadi ko jin dadi ba, sun dauke shi ne wata hanya ta samar da yaya, ko kuma gamsar da miji saboda gudun fadawa halaka. Don haka jima'i yana da bakin-jini sosai a wajen matan arewacin Nigeria musamman Matan hausawa.
Idan muka koma bangaren maza kuma, mazajen Hausawa na daya daga cikin wanda s**a fi kowane yare son jima'i. Domin kuwa Malam Bahaushe ko zai kwana da yunwa idan ya so sai ya auri mata biyu ko sama da haka. Sannan mafi akasarinsu abinda s**a dauki jima'i shine: wani abu da Allah ya saukar domin maza zalla. Basu yarda cewa mace tana da hakki ta bukatu da shi, ko ta samuwa gamsuwa a lokacin yin sa. Idan shi ya gamsu, to ba ruwansa da gamsuwar ta. Kuma bazai yi wani kokari don yaga ta gamsu ba. Saboda wannan dalili mata da yawa sun fada harkar Ma********on wato istim'na'i da larabci ko mu ce kokarin gamsar da kai ta hanyar yin abubuwa da zasu gamsar. Wasu kuwa rashin gamsuwar yasa sun fada harkar le***an ko yin samari a waje don basu irin gamsuwar da suke so.
Yana da kyau kafin ka afkawa jima'i kasan sirrinsa, iliminsa, ka'idojinsa, fasaharsa, da kuma kimiyarsa. Yana da kyau mu sani cewa Allah Ta'alah bai halicci jima'i don namiji kawai ba. Allah ya halicci jima'i ne don namiji da mace. Kuma kowannen su yana da hakki na dan uwansa ya gamsar dashi a lokacin saduwa. Rashin gamsar da juna yana cutar da mutum da kuma lafiyarsa. Abubuwa masu mahimmacin da ya k**ata ace mun sani kafin afkawa jima'i sune:
1. S*x is Ibada: Da Farko ka yarda cewa Jima'i ibadace. Domin yana daga cikin ibadoji da Manzon Allah SAW yace idan bawa yana yi ana rubuta masa ladan mai sadaka. Gashi dai dadi kake ji amma tamkar kayi sadaka ne. To ita sadaka a zahiri akwai sadaqa mai kyau (mai karbuwa) da kuma sadaqa mara kyau (mara karbuwa). Kamar yadda inganta niyya da kuma kyautata sadaqa yake sa Allah ya karba, to haka ma jima'i. Idan kayi shi da kyakkyawar niyya da kuma kyautatawa, sai Allah ya karba daga gare ku, kuma ya rubuta muku ladansa. Sannan idan kuka samu yaya, sai ya sanya albarka gare su sak**akon kyautata niyya da kuka yi da kuma inganta wannan ibada. Don haka tsayawa ayi jima'i da kyau, kuma a gamsar da juna babbar ibadace.
2. First Night Terror: Na wallafa rubutu akan yadda wasu s**a dauki first night din su. Wanda anan ne namiji yake sanya kaunar jima'i ga mace ko kuma ya sanya mata kiyayyar jima'i daga nan. Yadda namiji yazo wa mace a daren farkonta shi yake determing sauran dararen. Idan da azaba yazo, to haka zata dore da azaba. Kuma shi jima'i yana bukatar mace a cikin "Right State of Mind" din ta. Idan har wani abu ya sanya mata wani gilli ko zulumi, to zai wuya ta kara sha'awar jima'i da kai, sai dai da wani. Don haka a wannan daren farko ne kake bude shafin rayuwar jima'in ka mai kyau ko mara kyau.
2. S*x is love: Masana ilimin jima'i na duniya duka sun hadu akan wannan matsayar cewa soyayya daya ce daga cikin ginshiken jima'i. Kuma gaskiya shi malam bahaushe soyayyarsa tana tsayawa ne immediately bayan anyi aure. Kafin aure zai ta zuba soyayya k**ar wani Sharukh Khan, amma da zarar an shiga daga ciki soyayya ta zama tarihi. Idan kana kyautatawa mace kuma tana son ka, naturally zata rika sha'awarka. Kuma da kun hadu babu wani abu da take so kuyi sama da jima'i. Amma idan experience din ta na Love ya mutu, to zata rika maka kallon itace ne. Kuma ko da ta yarda kun sadu, tana yi ne saboda sauke nauyi da hakki. Amma bata amfanuwa daga abinda kake. Wata ma Allah-Allah take ka tashi kace ka gama. Idan kuwa kana so dukkan ku kuji dadin jima'i, sai kayi kokarin dasa soyayya a zuciyarta. Sanna sai ka kasance mai kyautata mata a kowane lokaci. Kuma wani sirri da mutane da yawa basu sani ba shine, idan aka samu soyayya mai karfi tsakanin mata da miji, to wani mu'ujiza ta ubanjigi shine kullum idan akayi jima'in, sai Allah ya sanya muku wata kawatuwa, kuji k**ar na yau yafi na jiya, nagobe yafi na yau. Sai kaji k**ar canja matar ake kullum. Ba wani abu bane tasirin soyayya ne.
3. S*x has mood: Jama'i yana da mood, mood din sa kuwa shine na farko ya zamto lokacin da ake so ayi shi babu hatsaniya ko tashin hankali a gida. Na biyu ya zambo cewa ba sai da mace tayi aiki ta gaji tana so ta kwanta ta huta a lokacin ne kake son ayi ba. Na uku mata suna da wani abu da ake kira mood swing, wato canji yanayi sak**akon changes a hormones nasu, wato wasu kwayoyi na halitta masu wuyar sha'ani. Idan aka samu daya daga cikin wadannan, to jima'i bazai dadi ba, ko niima mace batayi. Shi kuma namijin bahaushe a wannan lokacin ne yake kokarin exercising rights din sa da power din sa na namiji. Anan ne idan akai rashin dace sai ya budi baki yace miki Allah yana fishi da ke idan baki bada hadinkai ba. Don haka mata kalilan ne suke iya hakuri a cikin irin wannan yanayin su baiwa namiji hadinkai. Don haka kayi kokari ka gane mood din matarka, itama tayi kokari ta gane mood din mijinta. Sannan yana da kyau kai namiji ka sani, mace tana da wani period da ake kira ovulation period, period ne da yake zuwa sati biyu bayan jinin-al'adah. Idan kana son jima'i to ka gane wannan lokaci. A wannan lokacin ne ma idan kai ba mai zaman gida bane sai mace ta cutu.
4. S*x has life: Kamar yadda abu mai rai yake rayuwa sannan kuma ya mutu haka s*x yake. Shima rai gare shi, kuma tattalinsa akeyi. Kamar yadda ake tattalin shuka don kar ta mutu haka shima ake tattalinsa. Idan ya gaza samun kulawa, to zai mutu. Kuma idan ya mutu, yana wuyar gaske a iya reviving din sa. Hanyoyin da ake raya jima'i sune: Na farko, canja location din yinsa. Idan kun saba a daki wataran ku koma parlor, wataran kitchen, wataran toilet, wataran ku k**a hotel. Na biyu, a rika canja s*x style ko position. Kar a nacewa position daya (Yau butterfly, gobe prayingmantis, jibi Wheelbarrow, gata scissors etc). Na uku a rika cin abinci da shan abubuwa da suke karawa jima'i armashi. Na hudu, a rika yiwa uwar gida kyauta, kyauta tana increasing blood flow a brain (kwakwalwa). Hakan yana saka over excitement. Sai kaga madam tana binka kana guduwa. Sannan na biyar, a rika managing stress level. Idan aikin gida yayi yawa yana kashe s*x mood na mace.
5. S*x need trust: Daya daga cikin abubuwan da suke kashe jima'i akwai rashin yarda. Idan daya daga cikin ku yana zargin daya da wani abu na cin amana, to babu yadda za'ayi jima'i yayi dadi. Saboda kullum cikin zaman dar-dar ake. Musamman idan mace tana duba wayar namiji, tason duk wata tsiya da yake tsulawa a waje. Tana tsoron kar ka saka mata cuta, hakan zai kwashe duk wani kwanciyar hankali da kuke da shi akan juna. Don haka no matter what, kar ayi losing trust. Idan kuma an riga anyi, try to earn her trust again. Duk da ance ba'a bari a kwashe daidai, amma you can try. Mata suna da yafiya.
7. S*x is more than just s*x, it is an act of love making: Wanda s**a dauki jima'i a matsayin jima'i basa morar benefits din sa. Shi jima'i dole sai ka zo masa da soyayya, sai ka zo masa da hakuri, sai kazo masa da hikima. A lokacin da kake kusantar matarka kar ka zama mai neman bukatuwa, kar ka zama mai sauri, kar ka zama wanda kawai so yake ayi a gama. Mace tana so kayi mata wasa, ka sunbace ta (kiss), kayi wasa da jikinta, ka fara gamsar da ita tun ba'a fara jima'in ba. Manzon Allah SAW yace kar ku zowa matan ku k**ar dabbobi. Bayan an fara ka bita a hankali sanda take so a hankali, kar ka zama k**ar dabba, ka rika abu da zafi-zafi; wasu matan basa san haka (idan kuma suna so zasu fada). Sannan idan ka kammala, kar daga kammalawa ka tashi. Mata suna so bayan an kammala a kwanta kusa da su, a ci gaba da cuddling din su, ana musu wasa, ana musu hira. To a haka mace tasan ka karramata, kuma ka daraja abinda ku kayi. Kuma hakan ya nuna ba kawai don jima'i kake kusantar ta ba. More importantly, ka saba da ce mata "let's Make love". Kar kace "Let's have s*x". It is more adoring, more appealing and so demure.
8. S*x is an exploration and a journey: A yanayi na jima'i ana so kullum ka rika gano sabbin abubuwa da matarka ko mijinki yake so. Ka gane mai yake mata dadi, me yake sata nishadi, me yake sawa taje peak ko climax (irin ta fita hayyacinta). Sannan a duk lokacin da kuke jima'i yana da kyau ka rika karbar Feedback. Misali, to kin ji dadi? Abu kaza ya miki? Yau naga k**ar mood din ki ba dadi? Jiya it was different? Sometimes kuma yabo ake so. Idan an gama kace "Kai Maman Noor, sai kace Huril'in, irin wannan dadi haka", "Kankana uwar ruwa, mama Noor kina wuta fa". To idan kana mata haka yana boosting morale din ta da kuma increasing blood flow. Gobe idan kazo yi sai kaji yafi na jiya.
9. S*x has a language: Kamar yadda mutane suke da yare, jima'i ma yana da yarensa. Kowace mace da kowane namiji akwai abinda yake motivating s*x din sa. Misali: Bangaren mace: Wata macen bata so ka fada mata hakakawai. Tafi so kazo da raha, kazo da wasa, to a haka zaku zarce. Wata kuma yana motsa ta taga kayi wanka ka saka singlet ko ka zauna babu kaya jikinka. Hakan yana motsata. Wata kuma so take kazo da kayan-kwadayi, ko wani abu da take sha'awah. Wata kuma tana so ka zauna a gida da rana lokacin da yara basa nan, a sannane zaka ga bariki. Wata kuma kawai kazo mata da kiss, romance, etc. To problem din s*x language shine, wasu mazan ustazanci ya musu yawa - ko san ganin mace tsirara basa yi. Wani ma zai ce shi baya s*x da haske sai dare yayi ko sai an kashe fitila. Wani ma idan mace ta kusance shi don yi masa kiss sai ya dauke fuska baya so. Wata tana son oral s*x, shi kuma baya so, wasu kuma shine yake so, ita bata so. So yana da kyau ku fahimci s*x language din juna. A haka ne zaku samu gamsuwa da nishadi.
10. S*x needs time: Ba a sabawa da jima'i lokaci daya, kuma ita mace a halittarta jikinta baya karbar jima'i lokaci guda. It takes time. Watakila wata shida na farkon auren ku kawai ana yi ba don dadi ba. Amma a hankali yau da gobe kuna kara fahimtar juna, kuma jikin yana adopting, sai aga kawai an ware. Wata jikinta yana daukar shekara bai karba ba. Wata ma sai tayi haihuwar fari kafin tayi adjusting. So sai anyi hakuri, kuma sai an dage. Sannan yin tsallaken yi, wato a dauki lokaci ba'ayi ba kuma ana tare, shima yana kashe vibes na s*x. Duk rashin son yi ko rashin lokaci, kuyi kokari a rika yi sau hudu a sati.
11. S*x Health: Da wannan zan rufe bayanai na, na zabi na rufe da shi saboda shine the most important. Idan lafiyar jima'i ta tabu, to duka wadancan sun ruguje. Daga cikin abubuwan da ya k**ata a lura da su sune: Wajibi ne a rika gyaran jiki ana shan magungun daga saiwowi zuwa itatuwa. A wasu lokuta kuma kayan abinci masu kara armashin jima'i. Na biyu, wajibi ne idan kai sabon shiga ne kayi kokari ka rika daurewa kana dadewa kafin kayi ej*******ng (releasing ko kawowa da hausa). Shi Da namiji ko minti daya yayi akan iyalinsa yana iya samun gamsuwa. Amma ita mace minti daya yayi mata kadan. Shi yasa yake da kyau kafin ku fara, ka samu kayi romancing din ta don ta fara hawa climax. Daga bisani idan an fara jima'in, cikin kankanin lokaci zata samu gamsuwa. Sannan yana da kyau ka sani, ita mace zai wuya ta samu gamsuwa a minti uku zuwa biyar. Wata ma daga minti biyar din ne take sanin ka fara wani abu. So, akwai dabaru da ake yi na rike releasing. (1) Dauke hankalinka daga kan jima'i yayin da kake yi. (2) Kokarin yin tunanin wani abu da ba jima'in ba. (3) Wasa da halittun jikin mace yayin saduwa yana kusanto da releasing. (4) Yi da sauri da kuma yi a hankali sosai yana sa saurin kawowa, don haka ka zama a tsakiya. (5) Akwai abinda ake kira Kaggle Exercise, idan kana yin sa zai taimaka maka wajen hana ka kawo wa. Ka duba Youtube don ganin yadda ake Kaggle Exercise.
Sai issue na gaba wato issue na lubrication wato samun damshi a cikin farjin mace. Idan ya kasance cikin farji is dry, wato babu damshi, to jima'i yana zafi. Akwai yan dabaru da ake yi. (1) Amfani da silicon watery lubricants. ana sayar da su a supermarket. (2) Idan na farko ya maka tsada, a rika amfani da Man-kwakwa (coconut oil) ko Olive oil (zaitun). (3) Idan kuma sauri kake kuma babu a kusa, sai ka dangwali yawu, shima lubricant ne mai kyau. Barin farji babu lubrication yana saka zafin jima'i, sannan yana sa farji ya samu ciwuka. Sannan ita macen baza ta taba jin dadin jima'i ba.
Abu na gaba shine kula da lafiya da kuma tsaftar farji. Barin gashi a farji yana sanya farji wari no matter how many times ake wanke shi kuwa. Aske shi shi yafi alheri. Idan kuma ku ba masu son askewa bane; zaku iya aske can kasa wajen kofar farji sai a bar sama don yin wasa ko nishadi. Sannan da an lura da warin farji ya canja, ko aka lura da ruwa mai wari, ko ruwa mai koren color ko wani irin dumi k**ar ana rura wuta, to yana da kyau ayi treating infection. Da hausa muna cewa sanyi. Akwai maganguna daga itatuwa da suke maganinsa cikin sauri. Sannan shi maganin sanyi haduwa ake ayi tare, mata da miji, idan mata biyu ne ko sama da haka, duka za suyi treatment.
A karshe, babban remedy ko magani da ke magance matsalar lafiyar jima'i shine daily exercise. Idan namiji baya exercise, kitse da kwantaccen sugar yana taruwa a mararsa ya hana shi performing da kyau. Shine da ya hau minti daya ya sauka. Haka suma mata, I m sorry to say, kuma with due respect to mata masu kiba, gaskiya kiba tana hana more dadin jima'i. Domin mace tana saurin gajiya, da kuma saurin haki, da rashin juriya. Sannan zai zama cewa baza ku rika samun damar canja s*x position din ku ba. Kullum sai missionary ko goho wato doggy; Shikenan. Don haka yana da kyau uwargida da maigida su rika motsawa, sannan kar daga cin abinci a kwanta. A rika motsawa. Mata marasa jiki sun fi gamsarwa kuma sun fi zama flexible wajen jima'i. Kuma shekaru ko tsufa baya hana su yin jima'i. Sai kaga mace yar shekara hansin zuwa sittin amma jin kan ta take k**ar yar forty. Don haka a kula da wannan bangaren.
Conclusion.
Gamsar da iyali number one priority ne ga kowane namiji. Daga cikin abubuwan da suke sa mace ta raina namiji akwai rashin iya jima'i da kuma rashin sanin yadda za'a gamsar da ita. Neman ilimin jima'i wajibi ne akan kowane mai aure ko mai shirin yin aure. Hakan zai taimaka wajen samar da ilimin abin ta yadda ba za'aji kunya ba. Akwai Malaman addinin musulunci da dama da su kayi rubuce rubuce akan ilimin jima'i. Ku nema ku karanta. Ina discouraging karanta litittafan yahudawa da turawa. Akwai kauce hanya da sabon Allah a cikinsu. Hakazalika ina discouraging koyan jima'i ko neman iliminsa ta hanyar kallon fina-finan batsa. P**n ba gaskiya bane, fiction ne da action. Ba gaskiya bane. Idan kayi introducing p**n a cikin tsarin rayuwarka za kayi dakasani. Some people might argue and say, ai akuya ma ba wanda ya koya mata s*x, don haka ni ba wani karatu da zanyi. To kafin ka yanke wannan hukuncin yana da kyau ka sani, akwai Hadisan Manzon Allah da dama da s**a koyar da ladubban jima'i. Akwai hadisa daga sahabbai da s**a kawo ire-iren wannan ilimin da dama. Kuma idan har zaka iya bata lokaci ka hau Facebook kayi ta karanta gulma da labaran mutane, to inaga ba laifi bane idan ka nemi sanin wani abu da zai gyara mu'amalarka da iyalin ka.
Allah yasa mun ji kuma za muyi aiki da shi.