25/05/2026
"This child has changed o."
I cannot count how many times I have heard parents say this.
One day, your child is following you around the house, talking nonstop, dragging your wrapper, asking questions from morning till night.
Then suddenly...
They become quiet.
They lock themselves in their room.
You ask, "How was school?" and the answer is:
"Fine."
"How are you?"
"Nothing."
"Are you okay?"
"I'm okay."
And in your mind you are already thinking:
"Who is influencing this child?"
Sometimes we quickly assume children have become rude, stubborn, secretive, or difficult.
But many times, children do not suddenly change.
Something is happening beneath the surface.
Sometimes they are struggling with friendships.
Sometimes school pressure is weighing them down.
Sometimes they are trying to understand themselves.
Sometimes they are carrying emotions they do not even know how to explain.
Children do not always come and say:
"Mummy, I feel overwhelmed."
"Daddy, I am confused."
Instead, feelings often show up as behavior.
Before jumping into correction mode immediately, try slowing down and observing.
This week, try these:
• Sit beside your child without asking twenty questions immediately
• Create small moments of connection, while eating together, during a walk, while helping in the kitchen
• Ask open questions like:
"What made you smile today?"
"What was the hardest part of your day?"
"What has been on your mind recently?"
Children open up more where they feel safe, not where they feel interrogated.
Parents, teachers, caregivers...
Have you ever discovered that what looked like "bad behavior" was actually your child struggling with something deeper?
©️Dee Counselor
Child & Adolescent Development Specialist | Family Life Educator
