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Lou Lawrence, Wellington (2026)

15/06/2026

It is a profound and painful irony that within a community born out of the fires of oppression, exclusion still finds a way to take root.

The LGBTQ+ movement was forged by people who refused to be hidden, shamed, or medicalized for who they were. We fought—and continue to fight—on a fundamental truth: Loving who we love and being who we are isn’t a choice, and it cannot be changed. It is an intrinsic part of the human tapestry.

This exact truth is shared by the disability community. No one chooses a disability, and for many, it cannot be changed. Yet, despite these deeply parallel lived experiences of fighting for basic societal acceptance, bodily autonomy, and the right to exist publicly, disabled LGBTQ+ individuals frequently find themselves on the periphery of the very spaces meant to offer them sanctuary.

Pride events hosted in venues without wheelchair access, noisy marches without quiet decompression zones, or content shared online without image descriptions or captions; A nightlife culture heavily reliant on stamina, sensory overload, and physical spaces that inherently exclude those with chronic illness, neurodivergence, or mobility aids. A lingering, toxic undercurrent within q***r culture that prizes idealized, able-bodied perfection, leaving disabled bodies desexualized or ignored.

If a space is only safe for able-bodied q***r people, it isn't truly a safe space.

The trans women of color, drag queens, and street youth who led the Stonewall Riots didn't fight for a sanitized, exclusive version of freedom—they fought for everyone who was cast out by society. To honor that legacy, we must dismantle the ableism within our own ranks with the same ferocity we use against homophobia and transphobia.

Let's make our Pride truly accessible. Let's amplify disabled q***r voices, demand accessible venues, and remember that our strength lies in our diversity, not our conformity. We didn't fight our way out of the closet just to build new walls.

+

Image Description: Digital illustration of a black woman on roller skates who is standing on a disability pride flag in order to fly a rainbow pride flag. A watercolour background bears the phrase “What happened to inclusive?” as well as a gender symbol and wheelchair symbol. It is signed with the tag

11/06/2026

Wheelchair Fashion Tips: Autumn

Autumn has just ended here in the southern hemisphere and it’s still 3 months away for those of you in the north (hi! I know there are a lot of you) so the timing of this post is a bit off but hopefully you like it regardless. I love the fashion in autumn — I love everything in autumn — and I know that’s the case for so many of us.

I’ve been experimenting with some more western styles: bolo ties, bandana ties, button downs, and in slide 8 you see me take it to the extreme for the convention after-party that had the theme “Regent Rural Rave”. I’ve also been trying to find more creative ways to dress more masculine and reduce my dysphoria.

My style is a work in progress but this collection of autumn outfits feels good even if it’s not perfect. I hope these little tips are useful and that the outfits can inspire you, especially if you are also a wheelchair user and/or plus size. Owning your fashion choices is such a powerful way to reclaim your body and identity from the stereotypes and stigmas that come with the labels of disabled and/or fat.

Own your style, it feels amazing!

Image Descriptions:
1. Title slide with a gradient background featuring the title “Wheelchair Fashion Tips” and the subtitle “Autumn, Enby, + Plus Size” In a white text overlaid over 4 cutout images of Lou (white-passing, non binary, millennial) in different outfits and poses, 3 in their manual wheelchair and 1 using crutches.
2. Photograph of Lou (white-passing, non binary, millennial) posing in their manual wheelchair in front of a tall hedge. They are wearing light distressed jeans with white Dr Marten boots, a black and white vertically striped loose button down shirt, and a red drivers cap with a yellow suede shoulder bag. A white text overlay reads “shirts with oversized buttons are so much easier on hand function”.
3. Photograph of Lou on a veranda of a house with a vast view of nature, posed in their manual wheelchair. They are wearing black wet-look loose jeans and an oversized white button down with a bolo tie and black and white vans sneakers. A white text overlay reads “jeans with elastic waistbands are so much more comfortable when seated”.
4. Photograph of Lou in a park on a cloudy day posed in their manual wheelchair. They are wearing blue barrel jeans with a white button down and bolo tie with a back sweater layered over and a teal and gold embroidered coat with mega chunky black sneakers, yellow fingerless gloves, and a pewter-coloured slouch beanie. A white text overlay reads “open jackets need waist fastening or to be cropped to avoid damage from wheels”.
5. Photograph of Lou in an alley of street art, posed in their manual wheelchair. They are wearing blue and white flared leggings with an oversized black graphic T-shirt with a Van Halen print, white sneakers, a green mask, mirrored sunglasses, navy headphones, and a yellow suede shoulder bag. A white text overlay reads “cross-body purses do work with self propelling so long as the strap is shorter”.
6. Photograph of Lou posed in their manual wheelchair on a residential street in front of a deciduous tree losing its leaves. They are wearing black flared trousers, yellow platform sneakers, a colourful loose velvet sweater, and a multicoloured oversized crocheted snood scarf. A white text overlay reads “snood scarfs that won't interfere with self propelling are much more practical than ones with loose ends”.
7. Lou taking a mirror selfie in an empty dance studio in their manual wheelchair. They are wearing beige long loose shorts and a black and brown tie-die T-shirt with red and yellow custom chunky Fila sneakers, brown sunglasses, and a blue crocheted cross-body bag. A white text overlay reads “Tailored shorts, skirts, or trousers are much more comfortable seated with a sneaky elastic waistband”.
8. Photograph of Lou posing in their wheelchair on a high street at night. They’re dressed up in a western style outfit, wearing a blue tasseled button down with a neck bandana and bolo tie, brown high-waisted trousers held up with suspenders, black fingerless gloves, silver pointed boots, and a silver woven cowboy hat. A white text overlay reads “For a high waistband with a seated plus size belly, suspenders are a better option than a belt”.
9. Photograph of Lou posed in their manual wheelchair on a residential street on a sunny morning with sunlight shining from behind them. They are wearing light wide leg jeans with a white button down with 3/4 sleeves, an orange tie, and a grey crochet sweater with cropped sleeves and waist, yellow platform sneakers, and brown sunglasses. A white text overlay reads “sweaters with cropped sleeves and waists are perfect for seated self propelling”.
10. Photograph of Lou in an entryway in artificial light at night, posed using yellow SmartCrutches. They are wearing loose black wet-look jeans with a rust-coloured merino top with a baroque print chiffon bomber jacket, and yellow platform sneakers. A white text overlay reads “when you'll transition to walking, add feature sneakers for stylish Stability on your feet”.
11. Photograph of Lou in front of a garden lining a corrugated iron fence, posed in their manual wheelchair. They are wearing a white button down with tailored detailing and cropped sleeves, with a bandana tie, brown linen shorts, and white sneakers. A white text overlay reads “cropped sleeves on button downs avoids tyre burns on the cuffs when self propelling”.
12. Yellow slide with photograph of Lou (white-passing, non binary, millennial, wheelchair user) with small black text that reads "Kia Ora! I'm Lou (they/them) With all my content I try to show the living & learning that comes from being a multiply disabled takatapui in Aoteroa New Zealand & foster safe community" 3 headings in white text bubbles read "" "follow" "subscribe" with socials icons for Instagram, Threads, TikTok, Facebook, and YouTube.

08/06/2026

In 2019, Wellington City Library was shut down for earthquake strengthening. For 6 years it sat there, full of books, empty of life, the renovations taking several years.

That same year it closed, I was living in the CBD with my ex-fiancé. She and I adored the library and found it a lifeline living in an expensive city, in a tiny apartment, with almost no money. It was also the year I became a wheelchair user.

Last Friday I was back at the newly re-opened City Library. Last time I was there, I was using the pharmacy wheelchair we rented for a few weeks — the very first one I ever used. We thought it would be temporary, but that could not have been more misjudged.

So since I was last inside that library, I have been on one hell of a learning curve — a learning torrent. But, as I made my way there, I felt like I was at a high school reunion flexing my success. Because, in those first few years with the wheelchair, FND, hEDS, a toxic relationship, pandemic lockdowns, I had to learn everything the hard way and struggled endlessly to live in that city built on cliffs, hills, and valleys with only a manual chair.

But last Friday, I saw all the lessons and self-advocacy paid off. After 7 years, I have a set-up that is perfect for my needs. In minutes, my suitcase, day bag, Smart Drive and chair were packed into an Uber and then unpacked and reassembled in minutes. With the Smart Drive on I don’t struggle to propel with my 60 litre suitcase clipped to the back and my day bag strapped on top. I easily manoeuvred it all on and off the train hoist. I took myself down the subway, up an elevator, and onto a bus into the heart of the CBD. I bought lunch, tucked the drink into my cupholder and secured my bakery bag with the LapStacker. It was all so effortless and I was so confident.

16 year old me would probably be horrified to learn they’ll become a wheelchair user, but 23 year old me who was just learning how to, would be so proud and excited to know how much easier it becomes.

It was nice to be back at the City Library.

Image Descriptions:
Lou (white-passing, non binary, millennial) in their custom wheelchair smiles in a modern library with red beams, sitting by a table with a tablet and pink keyboard. They wear a neck brace, rainbow leg warmers, and yellow shoes.
Throwback of Lou in 2019 with short blonde hair sitting in a standard manual wheelchair on a brick street next to a painted rainbow crosswalk. They wear a grey t-shirt, yellow pants, reddish boots, and silver headphones.
A close-up throwback shows Lou with short blonde hair and glasses wearing a black face mask and silver headphones in a library. They wear a white t-shirt, and a tattoo is visible on their forearm.
Lou in their custom wheelchair and neck brace sits profile-view at a library table, typing on a pink keyboard connected to a tablet. They wear headphones, rainbow leg warmers, and yellow shoes.

28/05/2026

Literally had an existential crisis for a few days when I heard this news 😫

I’m tired, and I know we all are.

Fighting tooth and nail for absolutely everything, beneath a barrage of legislation and service changes that threaten our dignity, identity, independence, safety, autonomy, and health, is inherently defeating and I know after almost 3 full years of this coalition running this country, we are all worn thin and so tired.

That’s exactly what they want as they flood the zone pre-election.

It’s incredibly hard to find the strength to fight back and defend our rights but if you can find anything in you to do so, do it, and if you can’t, just make sure you’re ready to vote for a better future for us all.

Kia kaha, kia maia.

PS: I know I almost never do a video looking this hōha but I’m aptly time and energy poor this week and really wanted to get this out so I had to film at 9pm from bed. I don’t think it’ll be a regular occurrence.

Video Description: Lou (white-passing, non binary, millennial) speaks straight to camera from their bed with colourful pillows behind them. They’re wearing glasses, a yellow beanie, and their dark blonde dreadlocks are in pigtails. At one early point, a screenshot of a govt info page about the “Disability Support Services Bill” is green screened into the background.

11/05/2026

I offer this recipe up to both increase awareness of the ways hEDS can (but doesn’t always) affect people, and to the community in case there are helpful ingredients for others. Because, of course, hEDS is a vast spectrum all the way from those who don’t even realise they have it, to those who are critically ill and/or severely disabled.

hEDS affects every patient in a way as unique as their fingerprints, so everyone needs their own custom-fit recipe of treatment and management, as far as the medical system in their community is able to support them. Some of the things in this recipe of mine could maybe not be needed in the same way if I were better able to access treatment, especially if I had been diagnosed much earlier and could have made very different decisions about what I did and how.

In my case I am markedly disabled by hEDS but it’s quite clear in hindsight that had I been diagnosed 5-10 years earlier, I could now be in a much less disabled position had I taken different action. This is why early diagnosis is so valuable and should unquestionably be the goal.

There are 13 types of EDS altogether, one of which is HSD which in countless cases is essentially the same disorder as hEDS, but the other 11 types are much more rare and different. For these reasons, the classifications of the Ehlers Danlos Syndromes are currently under review with the plan to redefine them in a way that better serves each type.

It has taken me 8 years to find this recipe for management that works best for me and I hope in sharing it, other EDSers and the general public, can learn something valuable. Take what you want, leave the rest. Cheers to EDS & HSD Awareness Month 2026.

Image Descriptions:
1. Turquoise slide featuring the title “EDS & HSD Awareness Month 2026, Top 10 ways I manage my hEDS” and a collage of thematically appropriate cutout images showing Lou (white-passing, non binary, millennial) engaged in different activities and some of their illustrations of different aspects of their disability.
2. Orange slide featuring the title “1. medication” and a collage of thematically appropriate cutout images showing photographs and illustrations of different medication examples. White text reads “My 20+ medications have not cured any of my symptoms by any means but I do depend on them to live, and to live as well as I do. Finding your right unique medication profile can make life-saving differences even if they cannot cure anything completely.”
3. Grass green slide featuring the title “2. mobility aids” and a collage of thematically appropriate cutout images showing photographs and illustrations of different mobility aid examples. White text reads “Between joint instability, cumulative and chronic injuries, pain, POTS, and chronic fatigue, other than medication, mobility aids make the most impact on my quality of life with hEDS. Using a wide range of aids for different days keeps doors open to us.”
4. Turquoise slide featuring the title “3. hydrotherapy” and a cutout photograph showing Lou from behind in their manual wheelchair wearing their swimsuit at the edge of a hydrotherapy pool. White text reads “Movement is one of the only ways to preserve stability with hEDS but gravity and hEDS are definitely enemies. So, when it comes to movement, the buoyancy and proprioceptive input from being in water are game changers.”
5. Bubblegum pink slide featuring the title “4. bracing” and a collage of thematically appropriate cutout images showing photographs and illustrations of different bracing examples. White text reads “Bracing is a great tool for treating,managing, and preventing injuries with hEDS and over time that adds up to slower progression, more mobility, less pain, fewer surgeries, and greater quality of life.”
6. Purple slide featuring the title “5. pacing” and a cutout series of illustrations of a moderated to do list and 4 differing examples of Lou resting on their bed. White text reads “Learning to pace, plan, and prioritise your daily activities is non negotiable. Keeping track of your pain and energy and pacing accordingly is the only way to avoid constant flares and crashes.”
7. Blue slide featuring the title “6. electrolytes” and a collage of thematically appropriate cutout images showing photographs and illustrations of different fluids and electrolyte additive examples. White text reads “Keeping extremely well hydrated... with electrolytes added to the water you drink, makes a much bigger impact than you'd expect. It keeps blood pressure up, heart rate down, makes medication absorb better, increases energy, prevents bladder infection, and flushes out toxins, and all these have a cumulative benefit over time.”
8. Green slide featuring the title “7. adapting activities” and a collage of thematically appropriate framed photographs showing Lou engaged Im a wide variety of activities in adapted ways. White text reads “You don't always have to say no to challenging activities. It's true you may not be able to do them in a conventional way, but thinking laterally about adaptations to your methods can keep countless options open that you may not have thought.”
9. Bubblegum pink slide featuring the title “8. carer support” and a collage of thematically appropriate cutout images showing photographs and illustrations of different examples of receiving carer support. White text reads “Carers/support workers are a game changer. With hEDS limited capacity due to pain, fatigue, and more, it can be easy to find yourself unable to do anything other than survive. Having carer support to cover the basics on good and bad days allows you some capacity to engage in work or community as well.”
10. Red slide featuring the title “9. profiling bed” and a collage with a photograph of Lou on their profiling bed and an illustration of one. White text reads “For me, hEDS comes with spinal instability, severe chronic pain, and significant fatigue. I must spend hours every day in a reclined position and my profiling bed allows me to comfortably do so without slumping on pillows or getting joint pain from struggling to adjust my positioning.”
11. Turquoise slide featuring the title “10. temperature therapy” and a collage of thematically appropriate cutout images showing photographs and illustrations of different examples of heat and ice packs. White text reads “Pain is a huge part of hEDS and there are hundreds of creams, braces, medications, and devices out there that claim to ease it. I have tried most of them and the one that always comes out on top of everything is good old heat pads and ice packs.”
12. Yellow slide with photograph of Lou (white-passing, non binary, millennial, wheelchair user) with small black text that reads "Kia Ora! I'm Lou (they/them) With all my content I try to show the living & learning that comes from being a multiply disabled takatapui in Aoteroa New Zealand & foster safe community" 3 headings in white text bubbles read "" "follow" "subscribe" with socials icons for Instagram, Threads, TikTok, Facebook, and YouTube.

07/05/2026

Wheelchairs: a crash course, part ii

When I first needed a wheelchair, I was completely thrown in the deep end and found myself learning a lot of things in the hardest ways. I knew absolutely nothing about them and wouldn’t have guessed that it would be so costly and complicated until I had no choice but to find out.

I know from conversations with you guys that it’s pretty common that this is people’s foray into the world of wheelchairs. I’m not the only one who really could have used resources like this.

For any non disabled viewers, I think we’d like you to really absorb the exponential costs of wheelchairs and try to understand that while there are systemic supports for some towards those costs, that they’re often not easy to access if you can access them at all, so unavoidably, many of those costs are absorbed by individuals and families often at great expense to their financial stability. It would be nice for that to change, but at the very least, I wish I had been aware at the beginning how much it would cost me in every sense just so I could have been more prepared coz I bet while you can’t see yourself ever needing a wheelchair, believe me, for a long time, I couldn’t either.

My philosophy for most of the content I create is that I’m trying to create the resources I would have most benefited from at various times in my life and disability journey. I hope people will benefit from having the basics broken down in an accessible way because I would have. This series has been months in the making and I hope you like it coz there’s more subsequent parts still to come.

Image Descriptions:
1. Purple slide featuring the title “wheelchairs: a crash course, part ii” in a hand drawn block lettering and a handwritten subtitle “some of the kinds you may not have heard of” and 2 hand drawn digital illustrations of a gold and pink tilt ‘n space wheelchair and an orange and green basketball wheelchair.
2. Blue slide fearing the title “tilt ‘n space” in a hand drawn block lettering and a hand drawn digital illustration of a gold and pink tilt ‘n space wheelchair. Black handwritten text describes prices and features of this kind of wheelchair: COST, NZ $5K-15K+, US$ 3K-9K+, UK £ 2200- 7K+, CA $4K-12K+, headrest, custom or standardised sizing, highly-supportive upholstery, manually propelled, small or large rear wheel options, angle-adjustable tilting frame, custom or standardised colours
3. Salmon slide fearing the title “segway” in a hand drawn block lettering and a hand drawn digital illustration of a black and green segway wheelchair. Black handwritten text describes prices and features of this kind of wheelchair: COST, NZ$55K, US$32,500, UK£25K, CA$44K, standardised sizing, handsfree operating, heavyweight, requires some abdominal core stability to use, minimally adjustable, custom colour options, self-balancing, compact size footprint
4. Blue slide fearing the title “off-road” in a hand drawn block lettering and a hand drawn digital illustration of a black and yellow off-road power wheelchair. Black handwritten text describes prices and features of this kind of wheelchair: COST, NZ$10K-90K+, US$6K-55K+, UK£4500-40K+, CA$8K- 70K+, manual or powered models available, powered models most suitable across all terrain, heavyweight, custom or standardised sizes & colours, supportive seating, sometimes customised, usually with extra straps & belts for safety, off-road treads or tyres, come as separate chairs entirely or as attachments to convert a day chair
5. Turquoise slide fearing the title “sport” in a hand drawn block lettering and a hand drawn digital illustration of a black and orange and green basketball wheelchair. Black handwritten text describes prices and features of this kind of wheelchair: COST, NZ$2K-15K+, US$1200-9K+, UK£ 900 - 7K+, CA $1600-12K+, every sport requires a slightly different kind of chair, standardised or custom sizes & colours, lightweight upholstery with extra belts & straps for safety, smoother tyres for indoor use, as lightweight as possible while sturdy enough to be safe & effective, very deep wheel camber for speed & precision
6. Orange slide fearing the title “handcycle” in a hand drawn block lettering and a hand drawn digital illustration of a blue and white recumbent hand cycle. Black handwritten text describes prices and features of this kind of wheelchair: COST, NZ$10K-30K, US$6K-18K, UK£4500-7K, CA$8K-24K, usually standardised sizing & colours - custom sometimes available, 3 or 4 large cycle wheels, arm propelled pedal handles, hand-controlled gears & brakes, recumbant or upright, footrests to secure foot & leg position, non-collapsible, large & difficult to transport
7. Yellow slide fearing the title “beach” in a hand drawn block lettering and a hand drawn digital illustration of a black and red beach wheelchair. Black handwritten text describes prices and features of this kind of wheelchair: COST, NZ$5K-10K, US$3K-6K, UK£2200-4500, CA$4K-8K, usually attendant - propelled, sometimes joystick driven, large & difficult to transport, lightweight quick-drying upholstery, minimally supportive for short term use, standardised sizing, fat lightweight wheels to navigate sand & surf
8. Yellow slide with photograph of Lou (white-passing, non binary, millennial, wheelchair user) with small black text that reads "Kia Ora! I'm Lou (they/them) With all my content I try to show the living & learning that comes from being a multiply disabled takatapui in Aoteroa New Zealand & foster safe community" 3 headings in white text bubbles read "" "follow" "subscribe" with socials icons for Instagram, Threads, TikTok, Facebook, and YouTube.

01/05/2026

This is a snippet of my 30th birthday getaway vlog which is now live on YouTube. Leading up to this birthday, the big three-O, everyone in my offline life was very curious about what I wanted to do to celebrate and seemingly excited on my behalf.

I was nonplussed however.

I recognise the miracle that I’m even here for it at all, but appropriately for turning thirty, I know myself well enough to know I’m not a party person, not really even a people person, and I don’t usually like crowds or overstimulation.

All I could come up with was wanting nature time.

I knew I’d be staying with mum for Easter but it wasn’t until a week before that I thought of kayaking. The universe smiled on us with beautiful weather all weekend, and on me with no extra health dramas, so it turned into quite the magical down to earth getaway which turned out to be exactly what I wanted, I just hadn’t quite realised.

Video Description: mini vlog style video featuring clips of Lou (white-passing, non binary, millennial, wheelchair/crutch user) and a few of their close family members having a beach barbecue and kayaking on the Ōtaki river over Easter weekend 2026.

30/04/2026

Phew 😮‍💨(face exhaling) just scraping in to the very end of the month 😅(grinning face with smiling eyes and sweat drop)

I have the disclaimer that occupational therapists have only partly been involved in these particular adaptations. Most I have worked out myself, but that’s my favourite thing about occupational therapy — when you work with a therapist on a few things, you start learning how to think about problems in a different way.

The phrase ‘overcoming your disability’ is generally unpopular because of its inaccuracy. What is actually meant by it is that you’ve learned to work with your disability and adapt your occupational activities in order to take part in the world to a comparable degree. Occupational therapy plays a huge role in that. Partly because of their ability to think laterally to find solutions but also because of their vast knowledge of what adaptive tools are out there. Here in Aotearoa, OT’s are also the people who allow us to access funded equipment through the public health system.

I hate to think where I would be right now without the work I’ve done with OT’s over the years, so if you’re struggling to solve a functioning problem caused by your disability, they’re the people to seek out. Tū meke to all the OT’s out there!

Video Description: Lou (white-passing, non binary, millennial), dressed in baggy blue jeans and a dark green button-down with a read bandana tie, speaks to the camera from their colourfully decorated bedroom. As they discuss various adaptations, overlaid clips show examples and demonstrations of what they look like and how they work.

27/04/2026

It’s a cheap joke to finish on that catchphrase question, but it is actually true. Our mobility aids are our key to unlocking the rest of the world, the rest of life. If we’re scared, embarrassed, ashamed, of using them or taking them out in public, we do lose out on experiences or have those experiences tainted. Customising our mobility aids can help that. It can even generate excitement about using them which can encourage us to get out there and try things.

Customised aids are something I’ve seen come under more criticism recently but I have very limited empathy for such an attitude given how much it has been so natural and helpful to me and many of you. I can completely understand that there are folk who don’t want to decorate their aids or want a more sleek or minimalist look but it’s completely ridiculous to suggest that imposing that on other disabled people is somehow acceptable, or to imply that those of us who find joy or confidence in customising the look of our devices are somehow less valid.

In modern life, there is fashion within everything. There are trends in clothing and cosmetics of course but when you look around there are trends in cars, homes, even in tap ware and coffee machines. We have created a world where everything we own and use comes with some degree of choice and style and a way to express our tastes. It makes perfect sense that this would also extend to mobility aids and yes, just like in every other kind of fashion, there are those of us who like bright colours, patterns, textures, and customised decoration.

If you want your tastes reflected in your mobility aids with customisation, go for it, especially if it’s going to help you build confidence and motivation to get out in the world and truly live.

Video Description: Montage video showing Lou (white-passing, non binary, millennial) going through the process of using adhesive vinyls to decorate their black smart crutches with their signature yellow and a black and white checkerboard pattern then showing them using them with the new look.

Lou Lawrence

15/06/2026

11/06/2026

08/06/2026

28/05/2026

11/05/2026

07/05/2026

01/05/2026

30/04/2026

27/04/2026

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