31/12/2022
Madalas kong naririnig at nababasa lalo na sa social media ang mantra na, "New Year, I'm ready for you", sa tuwing sasalubungin ang bagong taon. Every year, 'yan din ang sinasabi ko sa aking sarili. Pero napaghahandaan ba talaga natin ang mga mangyayari sa darating na mga araw ng bawat taon?
The biggest, nerve-wracking twist of my 2022 was my father being diagnosed with Chronic Kidney Disease 5 plus Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease. Who could be ready sa ganito? This made me realized na I was never ready, that there are plots in our lives na masasabi nating "hindi ko ito napaghandaan." Hindi ko napaghandaan na I will spend most of my days in a week in a dialysis center para bantayan at samahan si Papa, while working (thanks to my employer for my work-from-home set up). And it was never fun spending your Christmas holiday break in a dialysis center or in a hospital while others are having their best times because it's the most wonderful time of the year. But despite this, kumakapit ako sa pag-asa na ang lahat ay may dahilan, at hindi Niya tayo pababayaan. For this, I know I still have reasons to be grateful - for my life, for the light when I wake up every morning, for the food & shelter, for my job, for my family and friends, and for the joy of living. I'm also thankful for my struggles because without them I wouldn't have stumbled across my strength.
To welcome 2023, I will not say "I'm ready", but I am definitely holding on to my faith that whatever this year may bring, I will have the strength to face it all. Cliche as it may seem, pero totoo, hindi Niya tayo bibigyan ng pasanin na hindi natin kakayanin.
Para sa mga sasalubungin ang bagong taon nang may karamdaman at pinagdadaanan, may you find comfort in knowing that with the new day, comes new strength and hope. Fighting!
-alomuntad