02/09/2025
Parenting? Spiritually? 🤔
The statement, “I want my pastor to force my child to come to church,” may sound loving, but it shows a wrong understanding of the role of the pastor and the role of the parents.
God has given pastors the task of preaching His Word, administering the Sacraments, and caring for the souls of His people (1 Corinthians 4:1; 2 Timothy 4:2). The pastor is called to shepherd the flock with God’s Word, but he is not called to rule over every household. That responsibility belongs to the parents.
Parents are the first teachers of faith in the home. Scripture says, “Teach these words diligently to your children” (Deuteronomy 6:7). Paul reminds fathers, “Bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord” (Ephesians 6:4). Parents are not only providers of food and clothing. They are also the first disciplers of their children. It is not the pastor, nor any other “discipler” that comes with modern methods, who carries this role. God Himself gave this task to parents. They are the ones who shape the daily rhythm of prayer, devotion, and worship in the family.
The Fourth Commandment reminds children to honor their father and mother (Exodus 20:12). This shows that parents have God-given authority over their children. With this authority, parents send their children to school, assign them chores, and teach them how to behave. In the same way, they are also to lead their children into the worship of God. Proverbs 22:6 says, “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.” Part of this training is bringing them faithfully to church.
A pastor cannot replace the parents in this responsibility. Parents do not call the pastor to discipline their children for skipping homework, nor do they ask the pastor to come every night to lead family prayer before meals. In the same way, the pastor is not the one to force children to attend worship. That calling belongs to the parents.
At the same time, the pastor is not absent. He has the duty to equip parents with God’s Word so they can carry out their calling with joy (Ephesians 4:11–12). He strengthens them through preaching and teaching, so that they, in turn, may disciple their children at home. The pastor feeds God’s people with Word and Sacrament, and parents bring their children to receive it.
So parents, come to Bible studies. Listen to your pastors. The pastor is counting on you to disciple your children, because God has given that responsibility to you. In this way, the pastor helps you better. He strengthens you with God’s Word so you can lead your children in the way of Christ.
The better confession of faith is this: “I, as a parent, will bring my child to church, because God has entrusted this responsibility to me.” The pastor preaches Christ. The parents disciple their children. The children learn to honor their parents and grow in the love of God.
When parents and pastors each fulfill their God-given role, the family and the church grow strong together in Christ.