Ako at ang mga multo ko sa buhay

Ako at ang mga multo ko sa buhay tae sa buhay ko

01/08/2025

🗝️ ‧₊˚ margaret atwood, from paper boat: selected poems; "he shifts from east to west”

01/08/2025

“Letting go wasn’t easy, but holding on was breaking me.”
I fought for us longer than I should have. I held on to every word you said,
every promise you made,
every moment that made me believe we still had something worth saving.

But slowly, the truth unfolded.
You stopped trying. I kept reaching for someone who no longer reached back.

And every time I held on,
I was losing parts of myself —
my peace, my worth, my joy.

You see, no one talks about the silent kind of heartbreak —
the one where you’re still together,
but it already feels like goodbye.

I didn’t want to walk away.
I didn’t want to let go.
But I had to choose between loving you and losing myself.

So I chose me.
With trembling hands and a heavy heart, I let go — not because I stopped loving you, but because I finally started loving myself.

01/08/2025

gonna cut people off

23/07/2025

And for some reason, I found myself wondering if I should continue everything,
or.. just stop,
because I feel like the weight of the responsibilities keep adding and adding to my shoulder.

I don't want to continue living like this,
I want to live for myself,
I want to live because I love to be here, and not because I need to survive.

I'm tired of carrying the weight of all the responsibilities,
I'm tired to keep going and showing them that everything is just okay,
And for the last time, I'm tired to just survive and not living.

04/07/2025

Hindi ko ata kakayanin 'to,
araw araw binibilang ang mga araw ko,
napapagod din ako.

Hindi maipaliwanag ang hirap na dinadala,
basta ang nais ko lang ay tumakbo pa palayo,
malayo rito sa lahat nang kakilala ko.

26/06/2025

ang insensitive???? hahahah kairita

25/06/2025

Don't trust your FRIENDS.

I trust my friends so much to the point that they're the one of the reasons why I am drowning,
I trust them so much to the point that they're the one who keeps on dragging me down,
I trust them so much to the point that I'm okay to be their friend when no one is around.

How awful I am to be sensitive,
they never made me feel that they care for me even once,
they never even made me feel that I'm belong to our friend group.

Sometimes I wonder,
Did I put too much to the point that I lose myself?
Did I let them know me well to the point that I don't even know myself anymore?
Or do they even really try to get to know me?

Are they really my friends?
Or just acquaintances?
Did any of them even treated me as their friend?
Or just someone who can they pull off when their favorite friend wasn't around?

24/06/2025

I really don't like the idea of comparing two people just to fit in to their standard's.

I hate comparing,
as much as I hate myself,
I hate how people trying to figure out what is missing to the other person,
I hate how they want to fulfill those missing in what they want to.

Does this missing abilities leads to unworthy of one person to be the one?
Does this comparison can strengthen the other person to do more?
Does this really important?

How can we really define a person?
How would we know if comparing them can really help the other one to be strong?
How can we know how do they feel about it?

Do we really have to compare two people just to prove that the other one is not good enough?
Do we really have to notice the flaws of the other one?
Do we really have to hurt their feelings and let them realize that they are not deserving?

What if I told you that everyone has weaknesses?
And what if I told you, the one that you keep on dragging down is already drowning?
What if I told you that it's not helping?
And what if I told you that slowly that person loses her/his self?

And as much I wanted to protect myself,I started to build walls,that no one could ever climb it—nor can break it.Even if...
21/06/2025

And as much I wanted to protect myself,
I started to build walls,
that no one could ever climb it—nor can break it.

Even if those deserving one's,
I can't let them climb it,
I can't also build doors for them,
Just to let them in.

19/06/2025

Loser's are the real winners.

Sometimes, there's some things that we can't let go unless we feel it,
we feel that we don't need to, but we have to,
we have to let people go, it's not because they hurt us,
but because our lives will be so much better without them.

I thought we just "outgrow" each other,
but I was wrong.
Because we grew apart.

We're not losers just because we choose ourselves,
we actually won.
Because our battles can't always be seen by everyone who's with it,
and maybe choosing ourselves this time is the right thing to do.

All of the energy, efforts and love we gave is enough,
we're already enough,
and the most important thing is we know our worth.

18/06/2025

Someone I used to know

I met someone today,
someone that I used to know,
someone that I shared my pens and papers with,
someone that feels like home.

I met someone today but it's not the same as it used to be,
we used to be best friends,
we used to be each other comfort zones,
we used to know each other before.

Or.. Do I really know you?
Was that all genuine?
Do we really know each other?
Or I'm the only one who tried to get to know you?

There's a lot of questions running in my head when I saw you,
there's a lot of emotions that mixed up when you said hi again,
when that "hi" used to be so loud,
when I don't know what to do or what to say when you're standing in front of me.

I miss you,
I miss that you're my one call away,
I miss your comforts,
I miss our laughs that we're the only ones who understands why,
I miss how you explained everything to me that I refuse not to understand.

But maybe there's a reason why we have to go back to being strangers again,
maybe there's a reason why I don't feel like talking to you again even if I really wanted to,
or maybe you forgot about me, about us, about our friendship.

I'm happy for you,
I'm happy that even though I'm excited to talk to you again, I didn't bother to message you,
I'm happy that finally I'm getting better,
I'm happy that you're happy.

< Mg4 b4g4y n4 t1n4yP k0 s4 l4pt0p k0>

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