16/10/2025
âI Wish Youâd Hear Me Before I Go Quiet for Goodâ
Husband? If you ever read this, I hope you know itâs meâyour wife (the one you always say you love). If you read this, I hope you feel that itâs meâthe one you call your wife, yesâthe woman who once loved you deeply, who gave you our beautiful daughter.
I keep telling you Iâm not okay. I try to explain the emptiness, the loneliness, the silent tears beside you at nightâor even when youâre away at work. But all I ever hear from you is, âIâm not doing anything wrong.â
Maybe thatâs true.
But not doing anything wrong isnât the same as loving me right.
You donât cheat. You donât hurt me. You come home.
But you donât see me.
You donât hear the sadness behind my quiet.
You donât feel the heaviness I carry just trying to keep this familyâand myselfâtogether.
And while you sleep peacefully, I lie awake wondering how someone who once held my heart so gently can now ignore the cracks in it like theyâre nothing.
Iâm not asking for grand gestures.
Iâm asking for your presence. For your emotional honesty. For somethingâanythingâthat reminds me Iâm still your partner, not just someone living beside you.
Iâm not posting this to shame you.
Iâm posting this because Iâm tired of breaking in silence, hoping one day you might finally listen without brushing me off.
Because if you ever read this...
I hope it hits you the way this pain has been hitting meâquietly, deeply, every single day.
I donât even know where to begin anymore, because part of me feels like you stopped listening a long time ago. But Iâm going to tryâbecause this pain is swallowing me whole, and pretending Iâm okay is killing me inside.
Since our daughter was born, my world shifted. Not because I donât love herâI love her more than anythingâbut because Iâve been navigating emotions I never expected, all while trying to hold everyone else together.
But whoâs been holding me?
Not you.
Youâve watched me drown in silence, and you sleep like nothingâs wrong.
Do you know what it feels like to cry quietly next to someone whoâs supposed to be your safe place?
To lie awake night after night, wondering how the person I love the most can be so close and yet make me feel so painfully alone?
You call it âdrama.â
I call it agony.
I donât need a perfect husbandâI never did.
But I did need someone who saw me.
Who cared enough to ask, âAre you okay?â
Someone who would reach for my hand when Iâm falling apart instead of turning away and rolling over.
Iâve changed. Yes, I have.
Motherhood changed me. Life changed me. This pain changed me.
And while Iâve been breaking, youâve been absentâemotionally gone.
And every time I try to talk to you, the wall between us grows taller.
I donât feel loved.
I donât feel safe.
I donât feel wanted.
I feel like a burden in my own marriage.
And if that doesnât shake something in youâif that doesnât hurt to readâthen maybe I really am alone in this.
Iâm not asking for a luxurious or extravagant life, husband đ„ș
What my heart longs for is simply your acceptanceâthat I exist in your lifeâand to feel that you are truly my husband. Thatâs all my heart asks for.
How many nights have I cried in pain while watching you sleep so peacefully?
How many days have passed where you just brushed off everything I tried to tell you about how I feel, as if itâs all just âdramaâ?
How many more times must I ask for even just your attention?
How many times must I beg you to put down your phone for a moment and ask me, âHow are you, love? Howâs your life now that weâre married?â
Do you even remember the last time you asked me how I was doing?
When was the last time I heard you say âI love youâ in person?
Iâm tired, husband⊠Iâm so tired.
And sometimes, I feel like if I ever reach my breaking point, I might just give this borrowed life back to God.
But your only reply is always, âThink of our child.â
Yes, thatâs trueâalways that.
But canât you also feel what Iâm trying to tell you?
Canât you see the tears on my face, or hear the trembling in my voiceâthe cries of my heart as your wife?
Does a mother no longer have the right to feel like this?
Do I no longer have the right to express what Iâm feelingâbecause in the eyes of others, âYouâre a mother now, you have everything. Think of your husband and childâ?
Is this really the consequence of becoming a mother?
That I lose the right to speak about my painâto feelâbecause people expect me to just be strong?
How cruel this world can be...
I just hope that when our daughter grows up, marries, and becomes a mother herself, she never feels this kind of pain Iâm feeling right now. đ
Husband? If I go quiet forever, will you finally feel what Iâve been trying to say all along?