28/06/2025
Proxy Doodle Fiction Dialogue:
R: Sup?
N: Painted some, more painting to do, feel a bit underweight again. Forgot2have lunch. I should prepare a kebab and matza ball soup in Z titanium pan. Nadia Shireen Siddiqi got mango 🥭 all over my shirt and paint on my shalwar...watching Doc Hollywood.
R: Ellen has an affair with a Pakistani man whose English she can't understand
N: Yep i'm sure z elusive Pakistani's boggled by Ellen's thick southern accent2. I painted an abstract plane over choppy water.
A self proclaimed sadist who often touted the manta that man's job is2 exploit, abuse & destroy woman. Whose definition of woman included his youngest innately prettiest and smartest daughter from the moment she developed the beginnings of mammary glands at the age of 9/10.
'Nadia's a woman she's got 8008s", he often announced
I find Guriya moto maami & Se*ma paglo khaala who taught her just as grossly mediocre avari towers ka jinn son gunda sa S to pursue, harangue & ostracise me 4 18 yrs isZworst I hope she&GSS burn in eternal h*ll; get their due comeuppance. Actually I don't care so long as they're nowhere near me; ever. Unfortunately mummy-ll force 2deal w/ them no matter. I did hiss, ' Hope u die of a cruel & horrible disease alot2my r f & he whittled away w/ diabetic sarcopenia.
Stalked by GSS 4m z day I turned 18; beat DTM in Biz Math at IBA undergrad despite being z perpetually screwed over designated scapegoat to a family of subterfuging saboteurs, to my mid 30s, highlighted w/ her re****ed, ' Marital r*** isn't r insistence that only do i have 2 deal with the mother who mutilated my teeth as Dentist Imdad Hussain kept chanting, ' Koi logon ko braces hu zarwat he naheen hoti aisay he haseen hotay hein; Jaisay ke nadia' on infinite loop.
Not once did he say the same abt my half a decade older sister w/ naturally crooked bad teeth unlike me. I complained abt the tooth my narcissisticSocio mother chipped when I was 4 on my 1st day at school at Toddlers Academy in the fall so had2b sequestered w/ a screaming banshee ginger redheaded teacher who resembled both Conan O' Brien & Mrs. T***T Gunther Taimoor & Umair's mom. The latter was an angel2me but in retrospect, I reckon it was only in the hope that my innately exceptional brains &looks might rub off on her idiot son.
The unfortunate thing abt having south node conjunct natal venus in Scorpio; house 10 in tandem w/ Pluto in scorpio in z end of z 9th house is i'm cursed w/ a 'riches to rags' 'once upon a time u dressed so fine threw z bums a dime in ur prime; then u' 'u went 2z finest schools alright Ms.lonely' rolling stone; fallen king la viva la veda life track, initial life story at least up until this point.
B: The fault in our stars
N: u didn't have 2die or assume z ideal muslim death position when u did. Suppine horizontal left hand on heart, right hand beside u4shahada: But maybe u flipped as u were lefthanded??? I get that being scorpio dominant, ur more of a natural martyr than ' ♐️ Sagittarius dominant in the 11th house, sun, mercury, saturn and uranus stellium having natural born truth teller whistle blower' me. Islamically we're advised to get as far away from Pharoah, Abu Jahl, Abu Lahab, their wives and their aal, aal meaning any1 like them. So it isn't my job2 even tolerate Aaji, pupoo, Sima, Samia et al, old f*gly personal space invader bullies w/ poor schooling, terrible English&math. Or random impertinent intrusive creeps onZnet.
Ergo ur Lady Gaga self batt*ry creative process& ultimate skullsmashing passing; stubborn earth dominant2 boot... but maybe as per dreams I've had ur soul is protecting against that of my repeatedly diagnosed psychopathic primary abuser? Perhaps? I dunno. U had a 3 decade advantage over me, perhaps more wisdom thus? Then again quantity vs quality, maybe u spent most of that time whittling ur nerves w/ booze, attempting to numb urself w/ ur unmarriagable 2me consistent Shiite J*w maatum?? *phew* *sigh*
B: Am I being interrogated?
N: No, invoked. I've got questions; want answers via more dreams.
We were at a dentist getting her wisdom tooth extracted; she asked me if I wanted2 get anything done.
I mean yeah I want aligners 2undo the damages she did2my naturally perfectly straight set teeth as demo-ed by the dentist I.H. w/ a plaster of Paris mold/mould of my teeth; but he didn't say my sister didn't need braces. Braces yellowed my teeth too. And the only thing I actually complained about was my Chipped by mummy on my 1st day of school' tooth.
Budh bazaar I knocked over this kid who 'as a joke' put his arm across my 12 yr old chest & later a skinny short man in tight jeans in a Hawaiin shirt literally stalked me around z market kept grabbing my b*m as if2 punish me4 knocking the kid (my age-ish) over or maybe z 2 secs he had w/ his arm across my chest? Whatever 'twas being targeted like that wasn't pleasant at all. Yes, mummy was around; she's always made it easier4me to get S.A. they see her &know i can't defend myself so was stuck giving my hand to Pup poo and Aaji grossness so they wouldn't be able to grab any other part of me. But I couldn't stand up2 any pred in front of mummy/nana, 'haw'touting victimblaming terrible fans of child/wife/women beating misogynists; living in z fantasy that I could ever like a jungly jaahil like Cuckoo, GSS et al. The universe doesn't get 'no' 'not', I should focusing my thoughts & energy on my 15 mill a month in Japanese Taxfree FH royalties, moving2 London &Sherri coming thru. Think abt the shard, eye, big ben; z cleanest newest tube train ever; Dania's St John's Wood. 'Hope u had a good 4th.
Psycho Sima called to b*tch abt me as if I haven't blocked her and hers 4m everywhere. Every time I try to set a boundary, cut her off; she moves2 cross it otherwise no care or love or interest in her own almost alone sister: disgusting.
I need2 make a vision board w/ 15 mill a month money, London & fit bikini babes + more writing creativity awards all over it.
B: u have quite a few 🏆
N: u promised me nominations no awards in future :( didn't mention ectopic pregnancy.But said I shouldn't've kids?
B: True
N: u insisted on kids, twins Joshua & Reuben them flipped2a I shouldn't've kids. This whole things weird i don't have perfect recall, 5 hrs r hard2recall play by play sans an oar, no northstar; guiding light or whatever. I've got a cheek zit thanks2 Sima paglo's budhduas
R: u really don't like her
N: Or any of her kids; pack of bullies.
R: 4thofJuly weekend.
N: any1 who knows anything at child S.A. survivors could've added, 'ur nothing like my dad, we don't even call him dad but daddy 4z longest time i didn't call him anything at all', ' I sound like a child' on repeat & 'I've got a v.loose urinary sphincter'
B: I directedU2 z ladies" near Delacorte theater &z other loo at the 3rd/4th Moma floors, where u could charge that Weber Shandwick android &
N: z illegal opening 4m behind the Met. U knew nanna won't b buried in Chicago that proved ur psychic.