30/05/2025
This is a funny joke from Nigeria
I went out with my babe yesterday. We were just there, eating, minding our business, when a couple walked in. From the way they were laughing & playing lovey dovey, I just assumed they were lovers.
Next thing, the girl and I somehow struck up a conversation.
I am very social, i easily gets along with people. One second strangers, next second besties. We started gisting like old friends— talking about the chicken, comparing it to KFC, rating the fries, all of that. My babe, ignored us. His job was to eat and pay, simple.
When we finished eating, my babe called for the b!ll and asked for a takeaway pack. As he was trying to package his chicken he couldn't finish, the guy that came with the girl stood up. "Babe, network is b@d here. Let me go outside." he said to his babe but it was loud enough for everyone to hear.
He went out. His babe stayed back and kept chatting with me. Well, our networks can misbehave sometimes. I didn't think much of it. But a few minutes later, the guy came back & whispered into the girl's ear. She put up a shock face. Me, I was just noticing from the side of my eyes.
Then she turned to me. "Sis, I know we just met, but my man's having network issues. Can your guy help us cover the b!ll? Once we go out, we'll transfer it back. Or you can give me your number so I can send it later."I smiled sweetly. "Sure thing darling, no problem at all." Then I turned to my babe. "Honey, please can you help my friend? Her man's network is having issues can you help them pay?" I asked.
My babe was confused. Usually, I am the h@rd girl. While my babe is the good guy. If someone asks for help, he help. So he said,
"Okay. How much is the b!ll?" The girl said, "Just 75k."
My brain paused. 75k is just in this economy? Wetin una chop? Me that our b!ll is 23k is it that we don't like food? My babe didn't want to embarrass my new friend, so he opened his bank app and started typing.
Then my babe’s phone started ringing. It was me calling. He looked at me, confused. I smiled at him like nothing was happening. He picked the call. I rolled my eyes and stepped on his feet really h@rd, he almost screamed. I immediately hung up & sent him a WhatsApp msg: "If you pay that m0n£y, I swe@r I will kee you. I will bvrn your car with you inside. I will d£strOy you."
"Honey, have you done it?" I asked sweetly.
My babe almost choked with laughter. He looked up at me. I was still smiling at him. He swallowed & said, "No, love, my network is very b@d too. The app isn't even opening."
"What about your card?" The girl asked
Yea honey what about your card? I asked my babe too "You know it has expired. I haven't had time to get a new one." He replied sharply.
"Awwww, that's true baby, he's been too busy to request a new one. You guys can use your card too or you can use yours. We really have to go now."
We stood up and left. The moment we got outside, i turned to my babe. "So, really? If I hadn't warned you, you would have paid for those cr!m!nals?"
"But... you were the one that asked me to pay."
"So, if I ask you to enter f!re, you'll enter or if I ask you to eat s**t, you will? You don't have street sense at all. Thank God for me in your life, or Lagos babes would just f!n!sh you. Gadus."
Men!
゚
