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!! BREAKING FAKE NEWS !!Over 500,000 Game of Thrones fans have signed a petition demanding HBO to remake the final seaso...
05/16/2019
Game Of Thrones Fans Create Petition Asking HBO To Remake Season 8

!! BREAKING FAKE NEWS !!

Over 500,000 Game of Thrones fans have signed a petition demanding HBO to remake the final season of the iconic show and an esteemed mental health scientist confirms this is actually a giant cry for help.

Dr. Tyrone L. Annister with the Boise Institute of Sadness has been studying the effects of the show on the mental health of its viewers for over eight years and compares the looming crisis with the current opioid crisis.

“For over eight years Game of Thrones fans have filled the empty void where their souls should be with a TV show and these characters have become their friends and family and helped ease the pain that is inevitable with such sad, empty lives.”

He went on to explain that just like any addiction, when you quit a drug cold turkey there will be a painful withdrawal period and this petition is simply a desperate attempt by addicts to get more of the drug, in this case, a TV show.

He continued, “Winter is coming for many of these fans. Some will survive by watching episodes over and over until they die, some with find an inner strength that will surprise anyone that knows them and they will not only survive but will mature as human beings and go on to live marginally interesting and worthwhile lives. Sadly, many will not survive and I expect a wave of Game of Thrones suicides starting on Monday May 20, 2019, the day after the series ends.”

But a wave of suicides apparently is not even the worst of it according to the doctor. “Death by suicide will actually be a blessing compared to what will happen to the weakest, the most vulnerable, the most ignorant and the most poorly educated of Game of Thrones fans who will desperately punish their souls and turn to a drug worse than any mankind has ever known.”

With a shaky voice and tears in his eyes the Doctor detailed the horrors to come, “these sad, stupid, pitiful creatures will become Trump supporters, a drug that is the closest thing mankind has ever experienced that could be compared to actually becoming a zombie. I have coined the phrase, The Walking Dead, for these poor creatures and if life was fair they would be put down and not be allowed to endure such misery. In our society we put a bullet in the head of race horses that break their legs and we kill rabid dogs but yet we allow these so-called human beings to continue to live and walk this earth fantasizing that their lives have meaning when it is much easier to argue the value a rabid dog brings to our society as compared to a Trump supporter.”

Dr. Tyrone L. Annister graduated from the University of Pitt County with a Bachelor of Arts in Eastern North Carolina style barbecue and earned his doctoral degree from the Romania University of Higher Learning and Hair Styling. Until he founded the Boise Institute of Sadness in 2011 he collected disability and worked part-time as a DJ at a local Boise gentleman’s club. When asked about the methodology he used in this study his response was, “I drink and I know things.”

If you do not have a life and wish to take the time, time you will never get back, you can sign the petition at https://www.change.org/p/hbo-remake-game-of-thrones-season-8-with-competent-writers?.

Sponsored by The Trump Apocalypse

    Game of Thrones fans haven’t been happy with the last season of the fantasy epic, expressing frustration over the series’ last batch of episodes on social media. Not only are fans complaining that the new season feels rushed, but they also feel that major character developments and scenes ...

Vladimir Putin has agreed to pay the fees.
11/08/2018
Onion Politics

Vladimir Putin has agreed to pay the fees.

"I mean, sure, he got some parking tickets, and he really should pay the fines, but it feels like people are freaking out for no reason."

!! NOT FAKE NEWS !!
11/06/2018

!! NOT FAKE NEWS !!

OK, here is my prediction and my theory on why I making this prediction.

All the so-called experts are saying that the Dems will take back the House but the GOPubes will hold on to the Senate.

My prediction is that the Dems will take both the House and the Senate riding a lovely blue wave and here is my theory why.

The reason that the polls were off in 2016 when it comes to Trump is that so many people did not want to admit they were a Trump supporter. I remember riding around the suburbs of Atlanta the days before the election and you saw Trump signs in yards but not so many that you thought he was a winner. The day after the election suddenly everyone, it seems, had a Trump sign in their yard. Cowards.

I think what is happening this time is that many Trump supporters are starting to have their doubts about this ass clown and though they are still telling everyone they are all-in with the guy they secretly are either not voting or are going to pull the handle for a Dem as a check on Trump's power. They want something to calm him down a bit.

Its all ego, after 2-4 years of bragging about their love for the guy, they do not want to admit they may have been wrong about the con artist.

I know it is only anecdotal but I talk to as many Trump supporters as I can and I know over the last couple of years the tone has gone from intense I am ready to die for the guy to, apologetic, hey, my choice was Trump or Clinton and I could not vote for her.

Plus, many independent voters already know they screwed up by voting for this chump and they voted Dem to try and right their wrong.

Like Trump, if I am right I will take all the credit for my brilliant insight and expect gift baskets from everyone and if I am wrong, its not my fault, what the f**k do I know?

Hope everyone has a great night.

Breaking Fake News is now sponsored by WebTickets.com and Free Atlanta Tickets !! When you need tickets to concerts, fes...
08/21/2018

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BREAKING FAKE NEWS:President Trump Apologizes to the WorldIn a move that has surprised pretty much all human beings on t...
10/23/2017

BREAKING FAKE NEWS:

President Trump Apologizes to the World

In a move that has surprised pretty much all human beings on this planet Donald J. Trump apologized to the world Monday morning admitting that he had totally confused the concept of being a "counter-puncher" with just being a total asshole.

In an interview with Breaking Fake News President Trump explained that after sitting down and speaking with his imaginary friend Jim he came to the realization that he thought that counter-punching in business and politics was the exact same thing as just being a heinous asshole to people.

"I want to apologize to the world. As anyone that really knows me knows, I am a kind and gentle soul that cares for people and I simply thought I was acting in the way a powerful and successful businessman and politician would and should act. My friend Jim explained to me that I had not actually been taught this concept at the The Wharton School of Business but it was just something I dreamed after eating too much KFC one night.

Breaking Fake News has not yet confirmed that the person we spoke with was actually Donald J. Trump and not just some fat guy with a bad haircut.

BREAKING FAKE NEWS:Social Scientists Confirm that Trump Victory was Actually "Suicide by Election"A ground breaking stud...
10/17/2017

BREAKING FAKE NEWS:

Social Scientists Confirm that Trump Victory was Actually "Suicide by Election"

A ground breaking study that will be published in the 2018 Sears Journal of Social Science and Large Appliance Pricing Catalog brought social scientists from around the world together to explain the 2016 election victory of Donald Trump as President of the United States and their findings are that his victory is the first confirmed "suicide by election" by a society in the history of mankind.

Gunther Wahlberg, University of Sweden social scientist and head coach of the University bandy team, "common traits we discovered in Trump voters were that they were angry, depressed, confused by the modern world, under educated and often addicted to opioids and/or video games. As we interviewed tens of thousands of these voters we realized that most had given up all hope and like a depressed desperate gambler putting his last hundred on a long shot many were putting their last vote, per say, on Trump."

"Many Trump voters after hours of interviews would often break down and admit they came to the realization that they had nothing to lose. A common confession was that they figured if Trump could actually do all he promised and really Make America Great Again, wonderful, they will have won the lottery by voting for him and if he turned out to be the narcissistic, petty, vengeful psychotic that most college educated people feared then at least a quick death in a nuclear holocaust would be a better alternative to the life they had to look forward to in a United States that seemed to no longer want their kind."

The scientists, over a nice lunch at Chipotle Mexican Grill, agreed that there was only one conclusion, that Trump voters were, in fact, suicidal and instinctively knew that if elected Trump would not eventually become "Presidential" but would most certainly do something insane that would lead to their death. "Crazy is as crazy does" was a quote the scientists confirmed they heard often in their interviews with Trump voters.

Pepe Bush, a scientist and custodian at the Mexico City Technical and Culinary College, has been given credit for coining the phrase "suicide by election" realizing that this election phenomenon compared closely to the "suicide by cop" phenomenon.

The 2018 Sears Journal of Social Science and Large Appliance Pricing Catalog is available for pre-order at Amazon.com for $29.99.

BREAKING FAKE NEWS UPDATE : This just in, not only can they trace human life back to one large goat, they have discovere...
10/17/2017
The Onion

BREAKING FAKE NEWS UPDATE : This just in, not only can they trace human life back to one large goat, they have discovered that his name was Lebron.

“Wait, that can't be right.”

Breaking Fake News's cover photo
10/16/2017

Breaking Fake News's cover photo

Breaking Fake News
10/16/2017

Breaking Fake News

The Onion
10/16/2017
The Onion

The Onion

"With so many awful things happening back-to-back, it just makes sense to plan a series of fundraising shows well in advance."

Spot on satire that sums up the Trump rise to power, I am so tired of the conversations that basically go, I know he did...
01/18/2017

Spot on satire that sums up the Trump rise to power, I am so tired of the conversations that basically go, I know he did so many horrible things as a single guy to women, but, hey, that is men, they are all dogs, and I know he did so many horrible things as a businessman, but that is business, it is dog eat dog, and I know he said and did so many horrible things as a candidate, but he did what he had to do to win, that is politics...but he really is a good man that wants what is best for our country and will be a good President.

I also like that the cartoonist drew a chubby little Donald but did not use the name Donald, the Trump supporters need it to be spelled out for them or they do not get the satire that he is busting on their guy.

Today's daily cartoon by Emily Flake. Swipe through more cartoons with the New Yorker Today app: http://nyer.cm/vKkg0V7

12/28/2016
BuzzFeed

Something to look forward to...

We're less than 4 years away!!

Breaking Fake News's cover photo
12/10/2016

Breaking Fake News's cover photo

Breaking Fake News
12/10/2016

Breaking Fake News

Do not knock the lifestyle, leave enough stuff on the floor you can trip over and a trip from the couch to the frig for ...
12/10/2016
The Onion

Do not knock the lifestyle, leave enough stuff on the floor you can trip over and a trip from the couch to the frig for another beer can be quite an adventure.

“A lot of people want to play it safe by engaging in some kind of physical activity every now and then. Not me, though. I live for the rush.”

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!! BREAKING FAKE NEWS !!

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