the catalyst for Selfish was a number of complicated emotions centering around anger. back then it was more personal, anger regarding being a minority in a world where I was seen as second/third/??-rate, about publishing being male-dominated, about being misunderstood and never fitting in.
the anger hasn’t left me. I’ve spent the past two years - the beginning of my 30s - thinking about anger and how it’s evolved. the personal has become ancestral, my anger focused on the choices my parents made, their parents, how to unravel and reconcile my emotional stunting and self-destructive tendencies. and then there’s the communal anger about our country being run by the fear of persecution, about incessant native abuse and territory encroachment, about black discrimination, about trans violence, about the fact that our planet is disappearing beneath us. the old anger pales in comparison, and yet the further I explore it, all of it, the more seems to exist never ending.
the next issue was born from a desire to hear from artists about how they deal with their anger. after watching mine get the best of me for years, lack of outlets circulating my venom back through my own system, I needed to know how others were exorcising/exercising theirs - and how they were struggling with it, too. by considering another issue, I also began challenging myself to finally address mine in some kind of healthy manner.
I’m sure so many of us are angry. angry now, angry forever, angry about lives we never even lived, angry about the ones we lose the chance to live every day the world continues on the way it has been. I’d love for this space to be an outlet for your anger. go ahead and strike a match 🔥