09/08/2026
Exotic Flora & Fauna 09/08/2026
Welcome to the 36th post in a weekly series entitled "Exotic Flora & Fauna!" This is a dive into various exotic plants and animals you might not normally hear about, and each Tuesday we'll feature a different and potentially mind-boggling entry. If you’re interested in the incredible, the spooky, and the downright kooky, check out these posts!
WHY! WHY GOD WHY! What the hell has this world come to?! What is Nick complaining about? Well you see, he’s a big fan of tomatoes. Cherry tomatoes, beef steak tomatoes, roma tomatoes, heirloom tomatoes, and of course ketchup. If it’s a tomato product, Nick is probably a fan of it. But what happens when things take a turn for the WTF? What happens when that late 70’s legend “Attack of the Killer Tomatoes” becomes a little closer to reality? What happens… when a tomato fights back? For your viewing displeasure, we introduce the Porcupine Tomato (Solanum pyracanthos).
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Solanum_pyracanthos
Morphology:
Solanum is a big genus, with a lot of fun things like, as mentioned, tomatoes, potatoes, and eggplant. But sometimes the fruit fights back. Or in this case, arms itself with terrifying thorns all over. These evergreen shrubs are typically 1 to 5 ft (0.30 – 1.52 m) tall, but they might grow taller if you listen to the ornamental growers. The leaves are shades of green, with horrific orange and red thorns running down their midlines. The stems are also similarly armed. The flowers are quite beautiful, and grow in clusters of star-shaped violet inflorescence. And then they become fruit, little marble-sized greenish-yellow tomatoes, which you can brave the thorns to eat, right? NOPE! POISONOUS! An unhealthy amount of tropane alkaloids builds up in every part of this plant, and it is considered dangerous to humans! DAMMIT!
Distribution & Habitat:
If you want to make an especially spicy ragu (please don’t do this, we don’t condone this), you can see the porcupine tomato in tropical Madagascar. They love the sun and the heat, and are not the most cold tolerant plants out there. They’re also grown ornamentally around the world because they look cool. But they’re not. They are a deceiver. A terrible, awful poisoner in the guise of a good fruit. Curse you porcupine tomato, curse you.
How Exotic?:
On a scale of 1 to 10, Nick’s News gives the porcupine tomato a 7 out of 10. It has thoroughly discouraged Nick from even picking the cherry tomatoes off the bushes out back, for fear that they will be his last tasty treat. The thorns are a pretty radical addition, and the flowers definitely upped the exotic look of this ne’er-do-well nightshade.
We hope you found this article informative and fun! Stay tuned for future installments, available on Tuesdays, as we continue to explore various exotic flora and fauna! If you have any questions or would like to submit an exotic flora and fauna suggestion, contact us here on Facebook or email us at [email protected]. As always, we love you all and have a great day!