Real World Recovery

Real World Recovery Welcome to Real World Recovery. Grab your helmets, kids, because we're fresh out of rose colored glasses

We're taking you out of the basements, through the back alleys, and talking about all the dog sh*t we've stepped in on the way through the minefield.

01/16/2026

Today marks a very significant psychological milestone for me. 5 years ago, I finally tried something different. It was scary, but I realized that I needed help. That part alone was not an easy thing for me to admit, but something within me was able to see what so many others already knew: I was losing the battle.

In those early days, I was miserable while my body did the hard work of pushing through the muck and fog. The person who emerged was humbled, motivated, and cautiously optimistic. Adopting a mentality of learning and listening allowed for the beginning of a new foundation to build upon. I kept showing up. I opened up. I leveled up.

Over 60 months, I have seen a lot of things change. More than myself, though, I am inspired and humbled by the stories I hear from others who have started walking the path after me. My favorite moments are when I get to celebrate others and witness their growth. For my part, I am honored to be able to do what others did for me: show up and walk alongside them.

Here's to all of you, no matter where you are on the path, for reminding me how and why we do it. You're all heroes in my book.

With gratitude,
Brett.

01/10/2026

It's time for some philosophy-inspired reflection:

The famous Stoic, Seneca the Younger, was a prolific orator and respected advisor. Seneca emphasized that revenge is a waste of time that invites more harm, whereas focusing on your own path is a sign of a "great mind."

I was watching Ted Lasso, and I heard a quote that reminded me of multiple Stoic quotes: "Don't fight back. Fight forward."

A couple of quotes from Seneca on this:

On not fighting back: "How much better to heal than seek revenge from injury. Vengeance wastes a lot of time and exposes you to many more injuries than the first that sparked it".

On fighting forward: "A blazing fire makes flame and brightness out of everything that is thrown into it". This imagery suggests that rather than pushing back against what is thrown at you, you should consume it to grow stronger.

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From Marcus Aurelius:

On not fighting back: "The best revenge is to be unlike him who performed the injury".

On fighting forward: "The impediment to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way". This is perhaps the most famous Stoic endorsement of using resistance to move forward.

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From Epictetus:

On not fighting back: "If anyone tells you that a certain person speaks ill of you, do not make excuses about what is said of you, but answer: 'He was ignorant of my other faults, else he would not have mentioned these alone'".

On fighting forward: "A man is not finished when he is defeated. He is finished when he quits". He taught that the goal is not to "win" against others, but to maintain your own progress and character regardless of their actions.

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In Stoicism, "fighting forward" means practicing Amor Fati (loving your fate) by taking whatever happens—including attacks or insults—and using it as raw material for your own virtue and growth.

In Recovery (and pulled directly from the Stoics), we are taught to focus on what we can control. We cannot control the external things that happen to and around us, but we can make an impact by focusing on how we respond to them.

At the end of the day, we don't have to get even—we just have to get better. Don't waste your energy on the injuries of the past. Use them as the raw material for a stronger, more virtuous future.

Is there a resentment you’re ready to put down so you can move forward? Let’s support each other in the comments.

12/24/2025

Happy Advent and happy holidays, friends!

It's been a while, and I wanted to check in to say hello. I wanted to take a moment to share a little win. I've settled in to a great role at a company that really values the people that work there. I've spent the last 4 months learning the business and designing new processes and tools to help improve the operations. I recently deployed the beta test version of a ITSM-compliant service desk/ticketing system that I built from scratch and completely customized for our business. I'm simultaneously building a quote-to-invoice sales, production, procurement, shipping, and invoice tracking system designed for a one -to-many-to-many architecture (think 4 imprint plus Costco).

I don't like to toot my own horn very much, but I feel like it's important to remind ourselves of the great things we achieve when we are in the right place. I'm feeling very grateful today for finding a company that really gives me the freedom to follow my process and trusts me to deliver. As I approach the 60-month mark, I still feel like I'm just getting started.

Whether you are new or remember writing the book, keep going. It's so rewarding.

With love and humble gratitude,
Brett

08/07/2025

Hey everyone 👋
I've been getting all settled in the new place in Charlotte, and I am hoping to get back to being more active on here now that the initial moving and majority of unpacking, etc., is in the rearview.

Still clean and doing some virtual meetings while I acclimate and search for a job. I'm hoping to connect with the other guys about doing a remote episode in the near future, too.

I hope everyone is doing well, and I look forward to getting back into the swing of things in the community.

How are you doing? I'd love to hear from you! -Brett

06/27/2025

Something I heard in a meeting recently from another member got me reflecting on the idea of amends:

How do we go about doing amends with someone that has been abusive in the past? The key part for me is the phrase, "... except when to do so would injure them or others." I was always told that "others" includes myself, so a direct amends would not be in my best interest.

There are other ways to move forward with the amends process without having any direct contact, let alone indirect contact. Sometimes simply acknowledging my own part in the mess, learning from the situation, and praying for the other person to get the same help that I have been fortunate enough to have found is sufficient.

There is a parable in Zen Buddhism that relates:

A senior monk and a junior monk were traveling together. At one point, they came to a river with a strong current. As the monks were preparing to cross the river, they saw a very young and beautiful woman also attempting to cross. The young woman asked if they could help her cross to the other side.

The two monks glanced at one another because they had taken vows not to touch a woman.

Then, without a word, the older monk picked up the woman, carried her across the river, placed her gently on the other side, and carried on his journey.

The younger monk couldn’t believe what had just happened. After rejoining his companion, he was speechless, and an hour passed without a word between them.

Two more hours passed, then three, finally the younger monk could contain himself any longer, and blurted out “As monks, we are not permitted a woman, how could you then carry that woman on your shoulders?”

The older monk looked at him and replied, “Brother, I set her down on the other side of the river, why are you still carrying her?”

06/20/2025

"As much as I wanted to figure out this recovery thing, I'm learning to just do what you do, and it seems to work." And just like that, we're carrying the message and offering hope to every addict in the room."

I had a pretty cool experience yesterday, and of course, this morning I read this in the Spiritual Principle A Day book. I was able to show up for a friend in recovery and help them network to get a problem sorted out, so I shared about it in a meeting and let folks know how it felt good to be able to be there for people now rather than always being the one trying to get something from them. I talked about the little victories adding up and changing me in ways I didn't really notice a long the way until I started to reflect on how far I'd come and what I could now do for service. That service work, in turn, showed me something new about myself: I found a new passion that I want to pursue and go to school for. A member told me after the meeting that my share sparked something in them, and they are going to look into going back to school for something they are interested in, too. This is what carrying the message, not the mess, looks like to me today.

📣 New Episode Alert! 🎙️“No Wasted Experience: Turning Jobs Into Purpose”This week marks a new chapter! Brett is joined b...
06/01/2025

📣 New Episode Alert! 🎙️
“No Wasted Experience: Turning Jobs Into Purpose”

This week marks a new chapter! Brett is joined by returning guest Patrick Kae — but this time as the new co-host of the show. 🙌

As Brett prepares for his move to Charlotte, he and Patrick talk about the strange, beautiful way life has of connecting all the dots—eventually. From odd jobs to random detours, what once felt like a junk drawer now looks like a toolbox with purpose. 🧰✨

They get real about:
🔹 The fear of starting something new
🔹 How past experiences shape our values
🔹 Why uncertainty can be a gift
🔹 Growing in recovery through change

Whether you’re rebuilding your life or just figuring things out, this episode is a powerful reminder that no experience is ever wasted.

📽 Tune in Sunday on YouTube or anywhere you get your podcasts! YouTube.com/
📅 New episodes drop Sundays at noon!

05/24/2025

Happy Memorial Day weekend everyone! We haven't forgotten about you. We're working on a few things, and we'll have some new stuff coming soon! Enjoy the long weekend, and a special thank you to all those who have given the ultimate sacrifice in order for us to be able to. Thank you veterans!

05/11/2025

Happy Mother's Day, friends! Quick note about this week's episode:
We've got it recorded, but we're going to wait until tomorrow to post it, so we can spend some time with family today. We suggest you do the same! Go see your mom, grandma, someone else's mom, or, if nothing else, go spend some time with Mother Nature!

Have a great day! See you tomorrow! ❤

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