The Slant

The Slant Vanderbilt's preeminent humor and satire newspaper since 1886. Check us out at vanderbiltslant.com. We are the best humor publication that Vanderbilt University (or the world) has ever seen.

Started in 1886, two years before our arch-nemesis The Hustler, The Slant has satirized everyone who needs to be satirized. Our online publication comes out on a rolling basis with visual, written, and video content.

Started in 1886, two years before our arch-nemesis The Hustler, The Slant has satirized everyone who needs to be satirized. Our online publication comes out on a rolling basis with visual, written, and video content.

Operating as usual

Need to send the UPS employees packing your room some requests? Click this link to find out exactly what that letter sho...
04/13/2020
A Letter to the UPS Employee Packing Up My Dorm -

Need to send the UPS employees packing your room some requests? Click this link to find out exactly what that letter should entail.

The Slant is Vanderbilt's funniest, snarkiest newspaper...since 1886.

We are a campus of change makers and we need your help. Click the link to sign a petition to stop petitions about things...
03/19/2020
Sign the Petition

We are a campus of change makers and we need your help. Click the link to sign a petition to stop petitions about things that Vanderbilt has already said that they would address.

Let's focus on the important things, like protecting our fragile squirrel population.

Petition to Stop Petitions About Things Vanderbilt Has Already Said They Would Address

The spokesman added that after tidying up, the woman would be expected to return to her place behind the scenes, though ...
02/05/2020
Report: Woman to Clean Up After Man's Mess -

The spokesman added that after tidying up, the woman would be expected to return to her place behind the scenes, though he left open the opportunity to clean up future man-made catastrophes.

The Slant is Vanderbilt's funniest, snarkiest newspaper...since 1886.

Interested in joining the Slant as a writer? We are currently taking applications for the spring semester! Fill out the ...
01/21/2020
Google Forms - create and analyze surveys, for free.

Interested in joining the Slant as a writer? We are currently taking applications for the spring semester! Fill out the application at https://forms.gle/8DXpPUtRaYD9VPfL9 or stop by the student media open house today to learn more about us.

Create a new survey on your own or with others at the same time. Choose from a variety of survey types and analyze results in Google Forms. Free from Google.

"We believe that not including any kind of central heating or air-conditioning system will really help students living i...
11/26/2019
New Residential Colleges to Not Have Full Kitchen, HVAC -

"We believe that not including any kind of central heating or air-conditioning system will really help students living in the new residential colleges form a closer, more tight-knit community. We picture students sitting together on the lawn outside Nicholas S. Zeppos College in the summer months under the 98°F Nashville sun rather than in the stifling brick oven we’ve constructed for them. In the winter, they’ll have no choice but to come together and huddle for warmth or else perish."

The Slant is Vanderbilt's funniest, snarkiest newspaper...since 1886.

"Student Health does want to reiterate, however, that any tests conducted or results given are NOT warrant for sick note...
11/18/2019
Branscomb Resident Tests Positive for Bubonic Plague -

"Student Health does want to reiterate, however, that any tests conducted or results given are NOT warrant for sick notes for class, so please control your blood-vomiting and take your ass to Calculus."

The Slant is Vanderbilt's funniest, snarkiest newspaper...since 1886.

"My life flashed before my eyes and in that moment, I knew that if I lied about that Friday night on Commons, I’d never ...
11/13/2019
"For F**k's Sake, Just Lie" says Office of Student Accountability -

"My life flashed before my eyes and in that moment, I knew that if I lied about that Friday night on Commons, I’d never be able to meet my mom’s eyes again (didn’t really matter with dad, that piece of s**t was long gone)."

The Slant is Vanderbilt's funniest, snarkiest newspaper...since 1886.

Vanderbilt homecoming is a tradition which has run for decades, but my dad has been running from me for 18 years now.
10/27/2019
Homecoming Weekend: Nostalgia and Neglect -

Vanderbilt homecoming is a tradition which has run for decades, but my dad has been running from me for 18 years now.

The Slant is Vanderbilt's funniest, snarkiest newspaper...since 1886.

“We were really worried that our rates of sexual assault on campus were going to be high,” said a representative from th...
10/23/2019
University Pleased To Report Sexual Assault Rates Not High Enough For Them To Have To Do Anything About It Yet -

“We were really worried that our rates of sexual assault on campus were going to be high,” said a representative from the University. “Not high, like, overall, but noticeably higher than other universities’ rates of sexual violence. Then that would be a problem. Because then someone might actually take note of our sexual assault rates and ask us to do something about it. That would be terrible for us personally.”

The Slant is Vanderbilt's funniest, snarkiest newspaper...since 1886.

His voice is far more gravelly than you’d imagine, the kind of gravelly that says, “I’m chill enough to smoke cigs, but ...
10/19/2019
"Get in Me," Moans Your Favorite Autumnal Sweater -

His voice is far more gravelly than you’d imagine, the kind of gravelly that says, “I’m chill enough to smoke cigs, but I choose not to.” He’s everything you could ever want and more. He’s a dashing dark grey, tight, fine-knit Chaps sweater.

The Slant is Vanderbilt's funniest, snarkiest newspaper...since 1886.

08/26/2019

Tonight, come out to the first Slant interest meeting at 9:15 pm in the Commons MPR! Learn about this fine humor & satire publication and how you can become a part of it.

Can't make it today? No worries -- we're having a second interest meeting this Thursday, August 29 at 9 pm in Buttrick 205.

See you at one or both or neither!

Cory BookerThe most interesting thing about Cory Booker is that he’s a vegan. And being vegan should be, at best, the fo...
04/02/2019
Assessing the 2020 Presidential Candidates -

Cory Booker
The most interesting thing about Cory Booker is that he’s a vegan. And being vegan should be, at best, the fourth most interesting thing about a person.

If voting for Obama made you feel good about yourself, this is your guy.

The Slant is Vanderbilt's funniest, snarkiest newspaper...since 1886.

#13 Phi Psi – Czechoslovakia. Doesn’t exist anymore but no one really noticedLeave a frat-country pairing of your own in...
03/27/2019
Frats as Countries -

#13 Phi Psi – Czechoslovakia. Doesn’t exist anymore but no one really noticed
Leave a frat-country pairing of your own in the comments!

The Slant is Vanderbilt's funniest, snarkiest newspaper...since 1886.

I followed up by asking Chad about how philosophy influences his life today. “I think my degree definitely made me more ...
03/26/2019
Alumni Shadows: A Day in the Life of a Vanderbilt Philosophy Alum -

I followed up by asking Chad about how philosophy influences his life today. “I think my degree definitely made me more marketable to potential employers, like I just applied to this blog called ‘Astrology and Stuff’? My dream job has always been to write vaguely existential horoscopes for teenage girls, so I’m super psyched.”

The Slant is Vanderbilt's funniest, snarkiest newspaper...since 1886.

03/22/2019

StandUp ShowDown Tonight at 7! Get your tickets at the door!

03/21/2019

StandUp ShowDown is tomorrow at 7pm! Buy your tickets at the door for the probably funniest but definitely most raunchy event of the semester.

Chancellor Zeppos and the Vanderbilt Board of Trustees are proud to announce a brand new full tuition scholarship to be ...
03/21/2019
Vanderbilt to Offer New “IndenturaDore” Indentured Servitude Scholarship -

Chancellor Zeppos and the Vanderbilt Board of Trustees are proud to announce a brand new full tuition scholarship to be offered to the class of 2023 and beyond! The scholarship is said to be inspired by Cornelius “F**k Labor Day” Vanderbilt and his robber baron history.

The Slant is Vanderbilt's funniest, snarkiest newspaper...since 1886.

Think about it. Then think about it some more. Then stop thinking about it and go with your gut. As Zeppos put it back i...
03/19/2019
Let's Face it, Blakemore Residents Shouldn't Get to Vote -

Think about it. Then think about it some more. Then stop thinking about it and go with your gut. As Zeppos put it back in October, Blakemore’s the fu***ng Puerto Rico of Vanderbilt

The Slant is Vanderbilt's funniest, snarkiest newspaper...since 1886.

"Do you care about recent political issues, such as BLM, LGBTQ discrimination, mass incarceration, and violence against ...
03/19/2019
Featured Org of the Week: WOKE VU -

"Do you care about recent political issues, such as BLM, LGBTQ discrimination, mass incarceration, and violence against women? Are you just a white, cisgender man who’s looking for a place to engage in enlightening conversation? Specifically, are you a brother of ZBT, DTD, or a SAE who wants to look cool with the lib chicks?"

The Slant is Vanderbilt's funniest, snarkiest newspaper...since 1886.

Want a sticker of our Chancellor, Nicky Z? Find our EIC out at tailgates!
03/16/2019

Want a sticker of our Chancellor, Nicky Z? Find our EIC out at tailgates!

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2301 Vanderbilt Place
Nashville, TN
37212

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It appears that Tennessee per capitol has the worst numbers for the virus. How is this so, when we have Meharry and Vanderbilt, but it is obvious that Governor Lee is a medical expert or is very incompetent. Physicians have been asking him for months to protect the people, but he elects to try to get re-elected. He has showed little or no signs of being a quality leader and we must rid the State of Bill Lee. We will all be dead under his watch, look at the numbers daily and he has had time to change his mind and to follow medical advice.
Conflicted about who to vote for tomorrow? Click here for a comprehensive guide to the upcoming election!
Conflicted about who to vote for tomorrow? Click here for a comprehensive guide to the upcoming election!
Conflicted on who to vote for tomorrow?? Click here to get a comprehensive guide to the upcoming election!