05/26/2026
Borderline Poisonous Pizza 🍕☠️🌲
Seven hours outside the PizzaMecca™️… and somehow I ended up in Houlton, Maine — practically in Canada — eating a pizza topped with something that’s only edible for about three weeks a year.
Fiddleheads.
The curled young shoots of the ostrich fern.
Apparently people in Maine looked at a seasonal forest plant with a microscopic edible window and collectively said:
“Yeah… put that on pizza.”
So naturally, I had to try it.
This review comes by way of Market Pizza — where manager Jamie agreed to make me a fiddlehead pie and risk my future dependency on green budding plants.
Outstandingly delicious.
Now I get it. A few bites and suddenly I’m calculating mileage, checking fern forecasts, and wondering how many pizzas constitute a seasonal habit.
And in this economy… I’m glad they’re regularly poisonous. Because with these gas prices, who can afford to drive up to Maine every time they’re jonesing for a fix?
🍕 🕋 🇺🇸 🇨🇦 🌲