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The Northport News Network is an amateur team of unsophisticated journalists committed to bringing you the latest breaking news, BS, satire, facts and fiction that you may or may not need to know or care about.

Just in front of the D***s Camp-“I would like to personally invite all 18 of my supporters to come out and attend my re-...
08/27/2025

Just in front of the D***s Camp-

“I would like to personally invite all 18 of my supporters to come out and attend my re-election party this evening with special celebrity guest and Texas Waterpark Developer Ken Donahue”
*no fondling of the goat will be tolerated or allowed without wristband

Former Homicide detective Dale Phillips wins Northport Mayoral Race while former Northport Mayor and Natural Disaster Am...
08/27/2025

Former Homicide detective Dale Phillips wins Northport Mayoral Race while former Northport Mayor and Natural Disaster Ambassador, Bobby Herndon offers Aid to the badly beaten candidates

Incumbent Woodrow Washington defeats the whitest man in the world, Zach Stone for District 2
08/27/2025

Incumbent Woodrow Washington defeats the whitest man in the world, Zach Stone for District 2

The people have spoken…. new Mayor to be announced soon
08/27/2025

The people have spoken…. new Mayor to be announced soon

Jamie Conger, endorsed by Northport Firefighters WINS DISTRICT 3. Karl Wiggins, endorsement from Golden Corral was not e...
08/27/2025

Jamie Conger, endorsed by Northport Firefighters WINS DISTRICT 3. Karl Wiggins, endorsement from Golden Corral was not enough to secure enough votes for the incumbent

08/27/2025

BREAKING NEWS UPDATE from the N.N.N Situation desk!

The city of Northport has partnered with Elite Staffing to hire the new Mayor. The City of Northport encourages all interested applicants for Mayor to apply in person or online at Elite Employment Services. All applicants will be subject to Chlamdyia testing.

As Voting Polls in Northport are closing, the Waterpark will be Opening!!
08/27/2025

As Voting Polls in Northport are closing, the Waterpark will be Opening!!

08/26/2025

Breaking News-NORTHPORT ELECTION 2025

Too early to call

On the eve of her final days in office, NNN has learned that Councilman D***s will make her final push to make Northport...
08/25/2025

On the eve of her final days in office, NNN has learned that Councilman D***s will make her final push to make Northport “woke” as she will be petitioning all Mavis Tires to rebrand like Cracker Barrel. She hopes by doing so that Northport can now land an interstate where Cracker Barrel will come to the city and patrons know that their tires are treated just as woke. Stay with NNN as developments continue.

Late Breaking News from the City of Northport, N.N.N was the first to break this. Happening nowThe city is in negotiati...
08/08/2025

Late Breaking News from the City of Northport, N.N.N was the first to break this. Happening now

The city is in negotiations to purchase Harper Farms in order to extend University Beach. At the next planning and zoning meeting, the following new park and roads will be discussed for vote as they connect to the lagoon. Stay tuned to NNN for more developments in this story

The Tuscaloosa Thread reports Jamie D***s has unfinished business she hopes to accomplish in her 2nd term….Mavis Tire at...
07/25/2025

The Tuscaloosa Thread reports Jamie D***s has unfinished business she hopes to accomplish in her 2nd term….

Mavis Tire at Bristol Park

Shutting down another park

MORE Sitting on ass to draw her check from the City of Northport

More Drinking and partying with Texas waterpark developer

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