10/22/2022
✨THIS IS 32✨
I’m navigating the intense whirlwind that is postpartum and these days are filled with spit up rags everywhere, sleepy newborn cuddles, more laundry than I thought possible, trying to change a diaper as quickly as possible so I don’t get peed on, lots of meditation, so many bodily fluids, making sure I remember to eat, constantly checking that little one is still breathing, being extremely conscious of my self-care practices, waiting patiently for the day when my baby won’t just stare at me blankly and will actually understand who I am, and trying to figure out how to make pumping milk more enjoyable (but, like, seriously, how do you make pumping not the most annoying chore in the world??).
And the spectrum of emotions!! I don’t think it’s talked about enough so let’s talk about it: I thought I had some sort of idea of how the intense postpartum feelings would go, but I knew absolutely nothing. Some moments are so wonderful and happy and fulfilling and I feel like I know what I’m doing and other moments I feel like I’m completely falling apart. A little less so now that the early ultra hormonal days have passed (thank goodness because those early postpartum crying sessions are exhausting), but the falling apart moments still happen, not gonna lie. I have to take each moment as it comes. Really good times and really bad times - it’s all there. And I’m giving myself permission to feel all the emotions. (Continued in comments)