Modern Polyamory

07/06/2026

I am not visible because I think every non-monogamous person should be.

I am visible because I can be.

And maybe every person who says, “Yes, this is my life too,” makes it a little safer for someone who cannot say it yet.

That is what the Week of Visibility means to me.

07/04/2026

Happy 4th of July from Reno, from Jan and Kyle, and from Modern Polyamory. ❤️🤍💙

We have spent the last year and a half building something together out of love, lived experience, research, a lot of conversations, and a shared belief that people deserve honest information about relationships.

We are still learning. Still creating. Still choosing each other.

And tonight, we are just two people kissing under the fireworks in the Biggest Little City in the World.

Happy 4th, friends. Be safe, be loud, love who you love, and build a life that actually feels like yours.

06/24/2026

New on Medium: The Future of AI Belongs to People Who Know How to Communicate.

If you’ve ever wrestled with a chatbot or spent way too long trying to get it to understand what you mean, this one’s for you.

Read the full piece on Medium.

https://vist.ly/58xkt

06/23/2026

Some people call it needy.

I call it basic emotional maintenance.

The Daily Check-In person likes a little thread of connection through the day. A good morning. A tiny update. A “this made me think of you.”

Nobody is asking for a dissertation.

But if “thinking of you” feels like a hostage negotiation, we may have found the actual problem.

06/23/2026

How do you communicate? Better yet, how does your communication style match your partners? Check out this video for more information about communication styles and how they might be impacting your relationships!

Everyone says communication is the key to polyamory, but what does ...

06/20/2026

Monogamy and Polyamory both work best when they are chosen, not assumed.

03/24/2026

Polyamory under duress” is one of those terms the internet loves to throw around like it’s clinically defined.

It’s not.

The phrase gets used to describe everything from:
• Genuine coercion
• Mismatched desires
• Poor communication
• Fear of losing a partner
• And sometimes… just discomfort with change

But those are not all the same thing.

And when we collapse them into one label, we lose the ability to actually understand what’s happening.

Not every difficult transition into polyamory is abuse.
But not every “agreement” is truly consensual either.

Those are two very different conversations.

In this article, I break down:
• Where the term “polyamory under duress” comes from
• Why the community ran with it before research caught up
• The difference between coercion, pressure, and incompatibility
• And why sloppy language can actually harm people trying to make sense of their relationships

If you’ve ever wondered,
“Am I being pushed into this… or am I just struggling with it?”

This is for you.

Read here:

Why Do Communities Create Relationship Terms Before Research Exists? In emerging areas of human behavior, communities often name experiences before researchers study them.People create language when they encounter relationship dynamics that feel new or confusing. These words spread through conversat...