Tom & Ben’s Northshire Weather Desk, inc.

Tom & Ben’s Northshire Weather Desk, inc. CAUTION: Nearly 100% Satire (that means don't take anything we say seriously) We are in no way associated with any agency or entity

This is a 100% for fun site, mixing weather and comedy together. None of our "predictions" can ever be taken seriously, we aren’t Meteorologists or Scientists. Basically we are just gathering information from various legitimate weather sites and comparing it to others. As one of our favorite Meteorologists Howie Altschule says: "If I were god then I would not need to change the forecast. Since I am not quite there yet, yes, I will adjust the forecasts as I feel necessary"

02/09/2025

✅ 7.02”
✅ 1.5 PBR
✅ School cancelled
✅ No power outages
❌ West River Weather Guy
⭐️ Tom & Ben’s for the win!
🏈 Super Bowl a go

Hello all,Winter Storm: Did you know its illegal to touch a bald eagle, even if its injured? is about to start in the ne...
02/08/2025

Hello all,

Winter Storm: Did you know its illegal to touch a bald eagle, even if its injured? is about to start in the next few hours. A full French Toast Alert has been implemented. Our crack team of top scientists have been crunching the numbers all afternoon, and we have deduced that an average of 7.02" of snow will fall in the Northshire. On the Pabst Blue Ribbon scale, we have moved to 1.5 12 ounce PBR cans.

Given the amount of snow we are not predicting, we are worried about our friend Forensic Weather Consultants as he seems to be missing. God speed Howie, wherever you are.

We were able to negotiate with Elon Musk, and we turned in our Politico subscription for a much more useful service, West River Weather Guy. West River Weather Guy is actually forecasting the least amount of snow, and we hope he is right, because I forgot to get eggs for my morning French Toast alert.

Good news for the all the kiddos, school will in fact be closed tomorrow.

Our new partner NED of Ned's Tracking and Electric predicts rolling power outages in the Chet Clark area of North Rupert, but says it has nothing to do with the snow storm (not sure what that means?). Thank you to long time follower Caroline, for negotiating this deal with Ned.

We anticipate Vermont Agency of Transportation will be out in full force during this weather event, and can expect a heavy hot mix once the snow has been adequately removed.

As always friends, lift with your legs.

PS. Intern Bryce was officially let go this past year, for conduct unbecoming of basically a scientist.

All, great news today.  Even though we have been hit hard by the DOGE and Elon, we were able to scrap up some funds to b...
02/07/2025

All, great news today. Even though we have been hit hard by the DOGE and Elon, we were able to scrap up some funds to bring you the first Weather Desk Opening of the 2024-2025 winter storm season. Winter Storm: Did you know it’s illegal to touch a bald eagle, even if it’s injured? Is in full affect, and will be impacting the greater Northshire area Saturday night into Sunday morning. No fret though, the Super Bowl should go on as planned, mostly because it’s being held in New Orleans and not Manchester.

We have reached out to our School closing expert, and while he is unable to determine at this point if school will be held Sunday (our guess is no, because it’s Sunday, but we aren’t the experts) we do expect a storm measuring at least 1.25 12 ounce Pabst Blue Ribbon cans worth of snow at this juncture.

Stay tuned for further updates tomorrow!

Oh yes friends, the weather desk is opening, and it seems to be a real sh*tty situation
02/07/2025

Oh yes friends, the weather desk is opening, and it seems to be a real sh*tty situation

Yes the desk is monitoring.
03/29/2024

Yes the desk is monitoring.

Good Morning Followers of the Desk!!!While we only opened for 1 storm this year it was a good one. We received more snow...
03/24/2024

Good Morning Followers of the Desk!!!

While we only opened for 1 storm this year it was a good one. We received more snow yesterday than the entire winter!

If you are new to the Desk we always like to declare a storm winner! The official snow measurement in Manchester outside our headquarters was 10"

We would like to congratulate Matt Noyes of NECN for having the most accurate forecast, furthest out!!! We would also like to extend an Honarable Mention to the National Weather Service Burlington for predicting the exact 10" amount yesterday morning!!!

Some of our spotters reported the following:

18" - West Pawlet, VT
18" - Hartford, NY
2 PBR Cans, 2 Keystone cans- Granville Village
21" - Queensbury, NY
21" - South Granville, NY
Pi**ed offf - Wallingford, VT

Until Next Year!!!

Matt Noyes: Broadcast Meteorologist
US National Weather Service Burlington VT

As the storm continue it has turned over to an icy mix in Manchester.We continue to be inline for our predicted 9.443”
03/23/2024

As the storm continue it has turned over to an icy mix in Manchester.

We continue to be inline for our predicted 9.443”

Top of the Morning Weather Fans and Dogs named Ned!!!Intern Bryce worked hard over night at the desk however has been re...
03/23/2024

Top of the Morning Weather Fans and Dogs named Ned!!!

Intern Bryce worked hard over night at the desk however has been relieved by a chief meteorologist this morning. Has anyone seen school closing expert Tim???

The storm is crashing down upon us. Is this an overperformer??? Starting to look that way to us! As you can see we are just shy of 6" at 6am in the Northshire!

Overnight models continue to be all over the place, with NWS Albany predicting 4-6" While NWS Burlington is predicting 10.1"!! Weather Channel has downgraded us from 17" to 7", while Accuweather has upped totals from 1-3" to 12-18"!! The predicted total is now 9.443"

If you have not had your french toast run (milk, bread and eggs) its way too late!!! We will continue to monitor

6PM UPDATE = Good Evening Snow Fans! Today at the weather desk, we've been busier than the Pawlet Constable!! Our usual ...
03/22/2024

6PM UPDATE = Good Evening Snow Fans! Today at the weather desk, we've been busier than the Pawlet Constable!! Our usual weather guru, Ben, is feeling a bit under the weather, but fear not, for we've summoned the mighty Intern Bryce to save the day.

Our resident school closing expert, Tim, has peered into his mystical crystal ball and decreed a jaw-dropping 100% chance of school cancellations tomorrow!

Now, onto the main event: the storm itself. It seems there are two factions emerging in the weather community. 1) Deep Heavy Snow, 2) Wet Mix Snow keeping accumulations down.

But fear not, dear viewers, for the Weather Desk has crunched the numbers with precision and concluded Exactly 8.186 inches of the white stuff is on the way!

IT IS HAPPENING!!!!The Weather Desk has opened for the first time in the Winter 2023-2024 Season!We are on the precipice...
03/22/2024

IT IS HAPPENING!!!!

The Weather Desk has opened for the first time in the Winter 2023-2024 Season!

We are on the precipice of the biggest storm of the season. We could double all the snow we've received this winter up until now!

As of the 6am update we have the following conclusions:
2"-20" is expected in Manchester

NWS Albany predicts 4"-6", while NWS Burlington predicts 4.3"

Accuweather surmises "a little evening snow" tomorrow

Howie and West River Guy appear to be asleep still

The Desk is prepared to be with you during this traumatic event, Ben is currently under the weather, but School Closing and expert Snow Measurer Tim is ready to step up with the PBRs!

Stay with us for continuing coverage. The current Tom and Ben forecast is for 8.414" in downtown Manchester

12/11/2023

All,

We have received several messages today asking if the Weather Desk would be opening for this weather event.

Unfortunately we are dealing with a funding issue at the weather desk this year, but are exploring grant opportunities. Stay tuned!

07/10/2023

Breaking news from the Weather Desk!!! Weather corespondent and friend of all has posted a live update from Wallingford, Vermont.. (eat your heart out Tim Cantore)

Stay safe out there folks … remember just 4 more months til the snow starts flyi.

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