At the Windowsill

06/02/2026

Ecclesiastes 3:11 says,

"He has set the right time for everything. He has given us a desire to know the future, but never gives us satisfaction in trying to find out what he is doing from beginning to end."

06/02/2026

Some prayers take longer than expected.

Some promises seem delayed.
Some doors remain closed longer than we hoped.

But God has never been late.

“At the right time, I, the Lord, will make it happen.” Isaiah 60:22

Not forced.
Not rushed.
Not delayed.

What God has prepared will come at the right time, in the right way, and for the right purpose.

So keep trusting while you wait.
Keep praying while you hope.
Keep believing even when you cannot yet see the outcome.

Because God’s timing is not just good—it is perfect.

PRAYER:
Lord, help us trust Your timing more than our own. Give us peace in the waiting, faith in the process, and confidence that what You have promised will come to pass exactly when You say it will.

Amen. 🙇🏻🤍

06/02/2026

05/29/2026

AT THE WINDOWSILL

When Two People Tell Different Stories

Understanding Why Good People Can Experience the Same Relationship Differently

By Karen Carter-Smith

Reflection

This morning at the windowsill, I found myself thinking about something that has puzzled humanity since the beginning of relationships.

How can two people live through the exact same experience and walk away with completely different stories?

How can one person say:

“You loved me.”

And the other say:

“You hurt me.”

How can one person remember gratitude while the other remembers pain?

How can one person recall sacrifice while the other recalls disappointment?

For years I believed that one person had to be right and the other had to be wrong.

One person had to be telling the truth.

One person had to be confused.

One person had to be the villain.

But healing has taught me something different.

Sometimes neither person is lying.

Sometimes both are telling the truth as they experienced it.

And that realization changes everything.

Scripture

“Man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.”

— 1 Samuel 16:7

Devotional Insight

One of the greatest sources of suffering in relationships is the desperate need to be understood.

We want people to see our intentions.

We want them to know our heart.

We want them to understand why we did what we did.

We want them to recognize our love.

Our sacrifice.

Our effort.

Our motives.

And when they don’t, it wounds us deeply.

Why?

Because most of us believe that if people truly understood us, they would see that we meant well.

But life doesn’t work that way.

People do not experience us through our intentions.

They experience us through their perceptions.

And perceptions are shaped by:

Childhood wounds.

Trauma.

Family systems.

Personality.

Attachment styles.

Fear.

Shame.

Past experiences.

Beliefs.

Values.

And emotional regulation.

The same words can land differently depending on who is hearing them.

One person hears:

“I want to help.”

Another hears:

“You think I’m incapable.”

One person hears:

“I care about you.”

Another hears:

“You are trying to control me.”

One person hears:

“I am trying to solve the problem.”

Another hears:

“You think I am the problem.”

Neither person understands the translation taking place between them.

The Truth About the Process

One of the hardest lessons God teaches us is this:

Intent and impact are not always the same thing.

That truth can be difficult for both sides.

The person speaking says:

“But that wasn’t my intention.”

The person receiving says:

“But that was my experience.”

And often both statements are true.

This is where many relationships become trapped.

Each person begins defending their own reality.

One insists:

“That’s not what I meant.”

The other insists:

“That’s how it felt.”

And around and around they go.

What if neither reality completely cancels out the other?

What if both people are carrying pieces of the truth?

What if two people can walk through the same marriage, friendship, church, workplace, or family relationship and honestly remember it differently?

Healing often begins when we stop trying to decide whose story is right and start asking why the stories became different in the first place.

When You Feel Misunderstood

Being misunderstood is one of the deepest pains a human heart can carry.

It feels unfair.

Lonely.

Frustrating.

We find ourselves wanting to explain.

Defend.

Clarify.

Prove.

Convince.

We keep hoping that if we say it one more time, in one more way, the other person will finally see us.

But sometimes they don’t.

Sometimes they cannot.

Sometimes their wounds are speaking louder than our intentions.

Sometimes their experiences have created a lens through which they interpret everything.

And that is where surrender becomes necessary.

Not surrendering the truth.

Not surrendering your voice.

Not surrendering your worth.

Surrendering your need to be understood by everyone.

Father’s Response

My child,

I see the places where you have been misunderstood.

I see the times your motives were questioned.

I see the moments when your love was rejected.

I see the frustration of wanting someone to know your heart.

But remember this:

I know your heart.

I know your intentions.

I know the places where you tried.

I know the sacrifices no one else saw.

I know the prayers no one heard.

I know the tears no one witnessed.

You do not need every person to understand you because I already do.

Your identity is not established by their perception.

Your worth is not determined by their approval.

Your peace will come when you trust Me with the parts of your story that others may never understand.

Let Me be your defender.

Let Me be your witness.

Let Me be enough.

Prayer

Father,

Thank You for seeing what others cannot see.

Thank You for knowing my heart even when people misunderstand my intentions.

Help me release the burden of needing everyone to understand me.

Give me compassion for the wounds that shape other people’s perceptions.

Give me wisdom to communicate with love.

Give me humility to acknowledge when my impact differs from my intention.

And give me peace when reconciliation is not possible.

Teach me to rest in the fact that You know the whole story.

In Jesus’ name,

Amen.

Reflection Questions

1. Where have I felt deeply misunderstood?
2. Am I seeking understanding or validation?
3. Have I considered how another person’s wounds may affect their perception of me?
4. Am I trying to convince someone of my goodness rather than resting in God’s knowledge of my heart?
5. What would change if I released my need for everyone to agree with my version of the story?

The Challenge

This week, stop defending yourself in one area where you have repeatedly tried to explain your heart.

Instead, place that relationship in God’s hands.

Ask Him to help you find peace even if understanding never comes.

Blessing

May you find freedom from the exhausting burden of proving yourself.

May you discover the peace that comes from being fully known by God.

May you extend grace to those who experienced you differently than you intended.

And may you rest in the truth that your identity is secure in Christ, even when others misunderstand your heart.

Love and Hope,

Karen

Copyright 2026