Impolitic Press

08/15/2024

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An Open Letter to Joe

Dear Joe,
It’s time for a reality check that you won’t likely ever read, but I sincerely wish you might. The story being circulated in the media is that you’re butt-hurt at Nancy, Chuck, and Barak for pulling their support for you and your run for re-election and that you still cling to the belief that you could have beaten the Orange Demon. If those are the actual facts, it’s time for a re-think, old friend. While many of the 50 million likely voters (Who watches a presidential debate if they aren’t likely to vote?) deeply appreciate the 40 years of sacrifice and service you’ve given in the interest of the American people, they also watched a performance that night that forced them to question the vitality and viability going forward of the fumbling old white-haired guy standing at one of those two rostrums. Sadly, that guy was you, Joe, and although it pains me to say it, after your performance, you couldn’t get elected dogcatcher in most municipal jurisdictions in this country, let alone President of the United States. Believe it or not, those three aforementioned individuals who did their part to discourage you are still your friends and undoubtedly admire what you’ve managed to accomplish—and are still accomplishing—on behalf of the American people during your Presidency. Regardless of what any little voice in your head or outside agitator might be whispering in your ear, your insistence on staying in the race posed an existential threat to what turns out to be a very fragile American democracy. Today, the stewardship of it rests in more vital—and yes, more coherent—hands; something for which, as a fellow citizen, you should be grateful. As an admirer of your career, your dedication, and the sacrifices you’ve made for America, I believe this kind of bitterness is unbecoming of a man of your stature. It’s time for you to admit that you’re human, to call your friends and invite them over for a hug fest, have a few cocktails, smoke a bone, or do whatever else y’all do in the halls of power, and all get enthusiastically on board the same train together. My wellbeing and the wellbeing of the planet and your grandchildren depends on it.

Sincerely,
Christopher Newman

06/14/2024

Now, with the announcement that Joey Chestnut won't be competing this 4th of July, this novel, written under my Pete O'Brien pseudonym, is suddenly more relevant than ever! And, it's FUN! Please share this with your FB friends, it helps my algorithm.

Twenty-eight-year-old Caitlin Ulmer has just graduated from Stanford with a PhD in Virology and after twenty-one years in academic harness is burned out. When she and her oddball posse of girlfriends visits a Buffalo Wild Wings at a San Jose shopping mall on the 4th of July to watch the annual Nathan’s Coney Island hot dog eating contest, she is both amazed and confused by what she witnesses there. Why is it that World Eating League phenom Tommy Filbert manages to ingest an astonishing seventy-six frankfurters in a mere ten minutes while the women’s champion can only consume fifty-seven? Cait stands six-foot-two inches tall, won a California state volleyball championship while in high school and a Pac-12 women’s rowing crown while an undergrad at Stanford, has always been able to drink most men under the table, and has for years been accused by her friends of having a hollow leg.

Suddenly, Cait knows exactly what she wants to do with her immediate future. In spite of the resistance that she knows she will encounter from her controlling parents and plastic-surgeon fiancé, she’ll take a year off before returning to the Virology lab at Stanford and dedicate herself to a training regimen that will put her in the position to challenge Tommy Filbert for that Coney Island crown. As has always been the case with Cait, second best won’t do. If she does this, she’ll need to win it all.

03/20/2024

Happy spring! Why not grab yourself a little feel-good spring reading?

02/19/2024

02/13/2024

This is me, once again writing under the pseudonym Pete O'Brien. These aren't the suspense thrillers I've been known for for decades. As Pete O'Brien I'm focusing more on coming-of-age in contemporary America narratives. Share it with your friends. Grab yourself a copy. If you get one on Amazon, please write a review. If you order it from your local bookstore, please ask to carry extra copies in their inventory.

09/20/2023

Okay, folks. Time to get serious about pushing his stuff. Pete O'Brien is deeply progressive writer who works mostly in the realm of irreverence. He's looking to share with readers who like a good giggle regardless of how bleak the landscape looks and is certainly never trying to imply that the outlook for the future of our beloved planet isn't, indeed, bleak. Hell, half the characters he writes embody traits that are a significant part of our current problem. That's because he's a student of human nature and can't turn a blind eye to much of what he sees. His narratives are so entertaining because there is still much nobility in the species and he thinks we need to see that in contrast to the ignoble that seeks to sink us. If you're a knuckle-dragging cretin his novels won't be for you, but if you thrive on irony, we think you'll get as big a kick out of them as we do!

08/18/2023

Pete O'Brien's rollicking new coming-of-age novel set in New York City, due out from Impolitic Press in late August, 2023

03/27/2023

www.impoliticpress.com

Has it been a while since you’ve had a good laugh while strolling through the minefield of modern-day political correctness? We know. That’s a hard thing to do, and yet we now endeavor to help you accomplish that perilous feat by bringing you daring voices adept at helping you pick your way, one...