05/28/2025
Self-gaslighting occurs when you doubt your own reality, feelings, and experiences, usually as a result of long-term conditioning, internalized trauma, or emotional manipulation from others (like a toxic partner, parent, or workplace).
You end up minimizing your own emotions, rationalizing harmful behavior from others, or silencing your own needs…essentially turning the gaslighting inwards.
Here are a few examples of how self-gaslighting shows up:
💔 You dismiss your feelings
“I shouldn’t feel this way. I’m just being too sensitive.”
“Other people have it worse, so my pain doesn’t matter.”
“Maybe I’m overreacting; it wasn’t that bad.”
💔You rewrite your own experiences
“It wasn’t abuse, maybe they were just having a bad day.”
“I must have misunderstood; they didn’t mean it that way.”
“I probably brought this on myself.”
💔 You blame yourself for others’ harmful actions
“If I had been better, they wouldn’t have treated me that way.”
“It’s my fault they’re upset. I need to do more to keep them happy.”
💔 You silence your instincts or desires
“I don’t really need that. I’m fine.”
“Maybe I’m just being selfish by wanting more.”
💔You invalidate your struggles
“I shouldn’t complain—my life isn’t that bad.”
“I’m just imagining things. I need to toughen up.”
When said, “Stop gaslighting yourself” in Episode 4 of the Love Means Business podcast it was a powerful moment that needed to be shared.
Watch the entire conversation with Robyn on Episode 4 of the Love Means Business Podcast
