20/04/2025
*sigh* Things people don’t tell you about healing —
The medication that saved your life might also have an unpleasant side effect 😭👩🏾🦲
My hair was my crowning glory when I was a kid and teenager. It was the one thing that made me feel pretty, because I had the lowest self-esteem ever as a relentlessly bullied, Coke-Bottle glasses wearing, brace-faced, twig that was obsessed with Harry Potter.
“Your hair is so long!”
“Your hair is so thick!”
“I wish I had hair like that, so healthy.”
It was quite literally the only thing that was ever complimented about my physical appearance before the braces came off and I started wearing contacts.
And my hair and I have been on some wild adventures. One in particular was having to do a big chop in 2018. That crushed me. I didn’t realize how much of my identity was tangled in my hair. I learned a lot about separating my worth from my appearance in that time. In about 2 years or so, it grew back longer and thicker than ever (rice water, it’s smelly, but it works!).
But my mental health wasn’t good. I was always on the high risk list at the VA, and I made frequent ER trips because I was a danger to myself. That was my life from abour 2014 - 2022.
Cue 2023 and finding Auvelity. And having a miracle on February 2nd of that year. The only side effect I had was sensitivity to light, so I happily wore very big dark sunglasses everywhere, inside and out. Think Audrey Hepburn in Breakfast at Tiffany’s.
I quipped, “That’s fine by me, I look glamourous as hell!”
Because I truly didn’t mind. I was lucky enough to get my life back. Lucky enough to have a second chance.
But within two months, the shedding started. I couldn’t figure it out. My diet had actually gotten healthier, and I was drinking plenty of water for once. I was way more active and so happy. I started seeing a stylist regularly, but the shedding didn’t ease up.
It didn’t make sense.
It wasn’t until two weeks ago that a friend mentioned that she stopped Wellbutrin because it caused significant hairloss around her hair line. That was a light bulb moment. 💡
“GIRL, WHAT?!”
“Yeah, it causes hair loss in some people. Why?”
Auvelity is part Wellbutrin and part dextromethorphan.
The shedding continues even now. So I’m beginning a new part of the healing journey that was completely unexpected.
Healing takes courage — even when it costs you parts of yourself that you love.
Have you ever had to choose between getting better and holding on to something that made you feel beautiful?
You’re not alone. Share your story if you feel up to it — or just drop a 🥹 if you’ve been there, too.
