09/12/2026
Dear Diary,
It was another day of our regularly scheduled chaos.
Mommy got off work, we went to bed, and when we got up it was immediately time for THE PRODUCTION.
First, everybody has to go outside because Mommy says she is not starting her day cleaning p*e off the floor.
I go first because apparently I take forever. I’m getting much better about p*eing right away, but p**ping? I gotta think about it. Wander around. Sniff some things. Consider my options. Reconsider them.
Bullet is the same way, except he also likes to back his butt up to something when he p**ps. A tree. A stick. Literally anything will do.
Papaw Ghost and Sugar are p**p machines. Mommy and Daddy swear they p**p approximately 47 times every trip outside.
And Nala?
Nala p**ped UNDER THE PICNIC TABLE today.
I don’t know. She’s weird.
Anyway, just getting all of us through the morning bathroom rotation takes at least 20 minutes.
Then comes FEEDING TIME.
You would think none of us have eaten since the Great Depression.
I personally like to stand there looking like one of those starving dogs Sarah McLachlan used to sing about on TV, even though I eat THREE TIMES A DAY and get puppy food AND grown-up food mixed together.
Nala also acts like she hasn’t seen a meal in six business days.
And Papaw Ghost will begin singing the song of his people LOUDLY if breakfast and fresh water are not provided immediately.
That’s another 15-20 minute production.
THEN Mommy makes herself a gigantic iced coffee and takes me and Sugar outside for her coffee and cone time.
I don’t know what cone time is.
I just know Mommy is happier when it’s over. 😂
It’s Friday, so the campground is filling up again. I woofed at some kids earlier and Mommy told me, “No, those are babies.”
The children immediately corrected her.
One is 7. Her birthday was the 5th.
The other is 4 and will be 5 in SEVEN DAYS.
So apparently they were, in fact, NOT babies and Mommy was informed accordingly. 😂
Also, some more old ladies told me I’m gorgeous today.
Obviously.
Then Daddy got home right as Mommy was clocking in for work, so he cooked dinner while the rest of us handled our evening responsibilities.
Nala played with MY giant fish.
Sugar climbed into Mommy’s lap to begin her shift as Mommy’s official coworker.
And Papaw Ghost chewed his foot even though he KNOWS he had his Apoquel.
So basically everyone is fed, everybody p**ped, Mommy has coffee, Daddy is home, Sugar is on the clock, Papaw is ignoring medical advice, and somebody stole my fish.
Just another completely normal day around here.
Love,
Huckleberry 🐾