The Grad School Femtoring Podcast

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The Grad School Femtoring Podcast

Learn all things grad school, sustainable productivity, & personal development for first-gen BIPOCs.

21/03/2025

Time blocking doesn’t work for everyone, especially those of us juggling multiple responsibilities with fluctuating energy levels.

In my latest Grad School Femtoring podcast episode, I share flexible alternatives based on my experience coaching grad students and professionals. They include:

-Three Things Method: Focus on just 3 priorities daily instead of overwhelming lists

-Rituals over Routines: Create flexible rhythms instead of rigid schedules

-Entrepreneurial Time System: Designate focus days, buffer days, and free days

As someone who once felt like a failure because I couldn’t stick to using a planner or following traditional time-management advice, I’ve learned these strategies through reading, research, and lots of trial and error.

Which alternative sounds most helpful for your workflow? Or what other time-management system currently works best for you?

Listen to episode 312 to gain five more strategies!

20/03/2025

Most people will tell you what to do and expect you to get it. I prefer to show you how to do it instead.

When I work with grad school applicants and professionals looking to optimize their productivity, I don’t just offer advice, I share my screen, break down strategies in real time, and walk you through exactly how to implement them.

Because seeing is different from hearing which is different from doing.

For grad applicants, I don’t just say “write a compelling statement,” “tell your story,” or “show, don’t tell.” I walk you through how to outline and structure it, and offer live feedback on what works (and what doesn’t), and help you learn how to tailor your essays so that your story matches the program’s mission. I even share sample statements so you can see these strategies in action.

For productivity coaching clients, I don’t just suggest a productivity method or tool; I share several of them and have you select which one might work for you. From there, I demonstrate how to integrate it into your workflow or schedule in a way that fits your life and work.

I do this because information alone isn’t enough. Trust me, if it were enough I would be out of a job when I’ve already shared 300+ podcast episodes with strategies to do this all on your own.

Understanding how to implement strategies, in a way that works for your identity, circumstances, and brain, is the key to creating real, lasting results.

If you’ve been struggling with grad applications or productivity challenges, let’s work together. I’ll make sure you don’t just know what to do, you’ll also learn HOW to make it happen.

15/03/2025

Chronic illness takes so much. But today, I want to honor both the grief and the gratitude.

Long COVID Awareness Day is today, and I, too, have Long COVID. I experience daily pain. I still grieve the non-disabled person I once was.

I grieve: Being able to do theater and stand for hours without fainting. Traveling for days and disrupting my routine without flaring up. Eating and drinking without worrying how my body will react. My old therapist (may she rest in power) who deeply understood the rage and sorrow of wishing for just one pain-free day.

This week, I’ve felt better than I have this year. After a tough start to 2025 with getting sick in January, then flaring all of February, I finally have had a decent baseline week. And yet, “better” still meant multi-hour migraine attacks, neuropathy pain, stomach aches, and feeling unsafe in my body.

But I’m also grateful.

I have a somatic therapist helping me find new ways to feel safe in my body. 
I can still work, less than before, but more efficiently. 
And this week, someone from high school sent me these photos of my theater days. It brought me to tears. It reminded me of joy. There’s still so much joy to experience.

If you live with chronic illness, I see you. If you know someone who does, remind them they are not alone. And if you’re new to this conversation, Long COVID and living with chronic illnesses deserve awareness because millions of us are still here, still adapting, still finding ways to live. And you could learn a thing or two about us about adaptability, especially right now when the whole world is falling apart.

[ID: Images of high schooler Yvette in three theater productions. Image one she’s wearing a dress and tiara and holding flowers while standing next to her mom wearing a green shirt and matching accessories. Image two she’s Rosalind in Shakespeare’s As You Like it but she’s also disguised as Ganymede and caressing the face of Celia. Image three she’s in a dressing room putting on make up with several temporary tattoos on her body.]

12/03/2025

One thing that really pi**es me off is …

witnessing brilliant scholars and professionals put themselves down, shame themselves, and feel like they’re not good enough, especially when they’re rejecting the very strategies and systems that actually work for them just because they look different from those around them.

I get it. I’ve been there. In grad school and in my 9-5 jobs in higher ed, I was afraid to trust my gut. I thought I had to do things the “right” way, meaning the way my peers and colleagues were doing them even when it drained me, slowed me down, and made me miserable.

It wasn’t until I finally gave myself permission to accommodate myself and seek the support I needed that I started to make real progress. And yes, that included hiring a dissertation editor and a job application consultant. Asking for help didn’t make me less capable, but rather, it made me more effective.

If you’re stuck in self-doubt, questioning whether you’re “doing this right,” or feeling like you should be able to figure it all out on your own, I want you to know that you don’t have to struggle to work and keep proving your worth.

What if, instead of resisting, you leaned into the tools, strategies, and supports that actually help you thrive?

If you’re ready to stop fighting against yourself and start making sustainable progress, I offer 1:1 coaching for first-gen grad students and professionals. Together, we’ll co-create a plan and system that works for you.

DM me or book a consultation to get started! And before you worry about costs, check out this guide on how to tap into professional development funds to cover coaching services: https://gradschoolfemtoring.com/how-to-secure-professional-development-funding/

05/03/2025

Did you know that it’s not just college and grad students who benefit from my workshops? Staff and faculty participants regularly implement my productivity and wellbeing strategies in their own work.

I’ve even had directors of programs later reach out to me to hire me for productivity coaching services after they learned more about my sustainable productivity coaching framework and strategies.

If you’re interested in workshops or professional development support tailored to your needs, please reach out.

21/02/2025

5 Acts of Community Care You Can Do in 10 minutes or Less! 💕

#1: Give Microaffirmations

Tell someone, “I see you, I hear you, I understand you, I affirm you.” Or show up and let them know why you appreciate them.

#2: Share Resources

Be generous with sharing articles, opportunities, and knowledge that could benefit others in your community.

#3: Send a Thoughtful Text

Let someone know you’re thinking of them; it’s a simple way to nurture relationships and show you care.

#4: Practice Active Listening

Set distractions aside and be fully present. Show your understanding by paraphrasing what others share.

#5: Express Gratitude

Reach out to someone whose work has impacted you and simply say thank you. A little appreciation goes a long way.

Want to learn more? Listen to episode 308 of the Grad School Femtoring Podcast to discover up to ten acts of community care!

[ID: Seven white images with indigo and maroon text and the caption shared above.]

06/02/2025

The start of this year has been rough.

I’ve been sick(er) and still not fully back to baseline.

My partner has been even worse, and after weeks of illness, I finally urged him to go back for another checkup.

On top of that, business has been slower than in years past—institutional clients are losing funding, individual clients have tighter pockets, and tbh, things are tight for me and my family too. It’s concerning, but we will find a way forward.

And here’s what’s keeping me hopeful:

-Having a solid number of 1:1 clients who continue to motivate and inspire me to keep doing this.

-Hearing from past 1:1 and group clients who still benefit from the work we did together. 
-Becoming a finalist for the Rise and Recognize Service Award for my coaching work. 
-Being nominated for a Catalyst First-Gen Book Award in the non-fiction category. 
-Most importantly: not letting setbacks freeze me like they used to. I’m taking action— prioritizing my health, wellbeing, my work, and my goals, even if it means doom scrolling less on social media and grounding myself more.

If you or your organization need support, my hybrid 1:1 and group coaching program for first-gen BIPOC grad students and professionals is open, and my calendar is available for virtual grad school and productivity workshops and keynotes. Please reach out.

[ID: Image of Dra. Yvette sitting down and smiling. She has olive skin, dark brown hair in a pony tail, and wears glasses, beaded earrings, a lilac blazer, and white shirt.]

04/02/2025

This month, I’m honoring Black History Month by amplifying two brilliant Black women who are shifting narratives and driving change.

One is tackling the intersection of race & ability in anti-ableist work within mental health care and higher education.

And the other is redefining what it means to be Black and first-gen while amplifying more nuanced and intersectional first-gen stories.

Getting to read their work and interview them on my podcast feels like such a gift!

As a non-Black person of color who is also disabled and first-gen, this is one way I show up—by creating space and sharing voices that need to be heard.

I’ll share more about my guests as their episodes drop later this month.

Who else should I feature next? Drop your recommendations in the comments!

24/01/2025

Feeling overwhelmed? Trust me, me too! Here are some suggestions for how to lower the bar and maintain momentum during difficult times.

First, redefine excellence. Excellence got you where you are, but it’s okay to choose “good enough” when circumstances change or your capacity lowers.

How do you know when to lower the bar? In some instances, such as during moments of high stress or personal emergencies, lowering the bar is obvious. But you can also do good enough work strategically to preserve your energy or make time to fill your proverbial cup.

How exactly do produce good enough work? You get to determine this but examples can include writing shorter emails or using templates, practicing strategic skimming and active reading, giving yourself time limits and turning in what you have.

If you’re new to lowering the bar, make sure to communicate boundaries and give yourself space to manage feelings of guilt. And remind yourself that your worth is not measured by your productivity. Doing bare minimum and focusing on survival is okay. Once you have more capacity, focus on momentum and progress over perfection.

Want to learn more? Listen to the episode 304 of the Grad School Femtoring Podcast on how to lower the bar without losing momentum in your career and life!

[ID: 6 lilac images with the text shared above. Image 7 has a snapshot of hands typing on a laptop with a book to the left of the laptop. The image also has text on the bottom that reads, “304: How to Lower The Bar Without Losing Momentum in Grad School And Your Career.”]

13/01/2025

Yesterday, I had a dream that felt like a message for 2025.

In the dream I was in an office with a few of my former supervisors and children. One of the adults was glued to the computer monitor, while another was too focused on staring at images of the past, and yet another one was easily distracted.

And after I looked at all the adults and felt an initial sense of discomfort and confusion, I turned my attention towards the children. I found them paper, markers, and crayons and ensured they had a comfortable and safe space to stay. And suddenly, nothing else mattered.

This dream, as I interpret it, makes complete sense to me, especially after a week full of anxiety. Between the ongoing fires in LA, my family of four getting sick, and other life disruptions, I’ve been reflecting on how we can no longer rely on old systems.

We must find new ways to adapt, grow, and maintain agency even in uncertain times.

That’s why I’m committed to helping others do the same. Through my hybrid coaching program for grad students and professional development workshops, I support first-gen BIPOCs with maintaining momentum on what matters most and sustainably reaching your goals.

If this resonates, please reach out so that we can find ways to mutually support one another.

11/01/2025

As someone who was born and raised in SoCal and moved away later on, I’ve witnessed so much hate for Californians both in the US and abroad. And I’ll tell you that if there’s anything I’ve witnessed the last few days from folks in LA with these devastating fires, it’s love. Love for our families, homes, and greater communities. Let’s keep offering California and LA love by doing what we can to offer support. Because before you know it, we may be the ones asking for support next.

[ID: screenshot of Threads post with text shared above.]

10/01/2025

I debated releasing this week’s guest episode. With the LA fires, I’ve been distracted and unsure if anyone would listen. But then I remembered:

1. I record episodes months ahead, and this one features a dear friend whose performance as activism work I deeply admire.

2. In tough times, we all need moments of relief and this episode can offer that.

Sometimes, showing up as planned can offer comfort so if you need that check out episode 302 of the Grad School Femtoring Podcast.

—-

In today’s episode of the Grad School Femtoring Podcast, I welcome my guest and dear friend, Doris Difarnecio, a feminist, interdisciplinary artist, theater director, and performance activist, to share her remarkable journey through performance as activism. Doris talks about her roots, growing up between Colombia and the United States, her academic trajectory, and her impactful theater work. Together, we explore themes of identity, race, gender, and sexuality, and how these intersect with her artistic and activist efforts. Additionally, Doris introduces us to Arte Acción, her interdisciplinary platform for performance and politics. This heartfelt conversation sheds light on how personal experiences fuel activism and the transformative power of performance in addressing social issues.

09/01/2025

For those of us away from California witnessing these devastating fires from afar, gentle reminder that you don’t have to continue on “business as usual.”

Instead, you can:

lower the bar at work,
cancel that meeting,
leave work early,
take a mental health day,
use your PTO,
channel your rage,
and use your temporary geographic privilege (because the climate crisis will directly impact us all eventually) to support others in need in whatever way is accessible to you.

[ID: screenshot of a Thread with the text shared above.]

03/01/2025

Five things that I’m grateful for in the new year! ✨

1) Taking time off for the holidays, slowing down, and doing things that make me happy like exploring new parks, reading, and writing. My current read, via audiobook, is Tiffany A. Yu, MSc’s The Anti-Ableist Manifesto, and it’s so good!

2) Having some family come over so my kids spend quality time with their cousins. Living in a different state as my bio and chosen fam comes with its set of challenges and so it means the world to use when folks choose to visit us in Vegas.

3) My co-author, Miroslava Chavez-Garcia, and I were accepted to present at the McNair Promising Practices Institute, a national conference for McNair professionals. Our presentation is titled “Accessible Grad School Preparation Tools: Insights from Is Grad School for Me?” We’re also open to presenting on the topic to other grad prep programs, so please reach out.

4) Getting invited to be a guest on the podcast Qué pasa, HSIs with Dr. Gina Ann Garcia to speak on the topic of supporting grad students at HSIs.

5) And having two podcast episodes I recorded release today. The first is an episode on the Academic Life Podcast with Christina Gessler, PhD on grad school myths and misconceptions. The second is an episode on gentle productivity tips for chronic illness, autism, and ADHD, on my Grad School Femtoring Podcast. You can listen to them at the links in the comments.

I still haven’t finished setting 2025 goals. I also haven’t created a vision board, which is so unlike the type A virgo in me, lol. And yet, I’m embracing it because I’m honoring my body’s need to continue slowly reflecting at the very least until the Lunar New Year.

Of course, I am also dealing with grief and personal challenges tied to loved ones whose heartbreaking stories are not mine to share. But I’m choosing to slow down to honor the nuance that is life.

What are you grateful for so far in the new year?

[ID: screenshot of LinkedIn post with text shared above.]

24/12/2024

In December 2016, my eldest child was diagnosed on the autism spectrum. Today, eight years later, I received my own diagnosis. A very Merry Christmas Eve to me!

For those who are self-diagnosed or questioning, please know that your experience is valid.

While a formal diagnosis can be affirming, it also requires financial and educational privileges (among others) that not everyone has access to and not having one doesn’t diminish your truth.

Being autistic doesn’t take away from my strengths or self-worth. It’s okay to need extra supports or accommodations—they honor my needs and help me thrive.

To my neurodivergent community, you are enough and you deserve to live a life according to your own terms.

And to everyone else, believe us and see us for all the assets we can bring to any environment.

[ID: screenshot of LinkedIn post with text shared above.]

26/11/2024

I want to share a story that highlights the power of coaching in helping nontraditional, first-gen, Latina grad students succeed.

One of my long-term coaching clients—who worked with me for two years—graduated this year with her PhD!

Her journey wasn’t easy. She was juggling motherhood, multiple part-time jobs, and a difficult advisor but with structured support, accountability, and a plan that fit her specific challenges as a Latina mama and first-gen scholar, she reached the finish line with a postdoc lined up after graduation.

Here’s where it gets even better: she referred her close friend, who was facing a daunting challenge—finishing her dissertation in just two months while juggling not one, but three part-time jobs. With tailored coaching and a clear roadmap, this client is in the middle of finishing up revisions and filing her dissertation as we speak! 🎓

But it doesn’t end there. Seeing the value of coaching firsthand, this new client has now referred two of her writing group colleagues, who’ve both connected with me to explore coaching for their own grad school journeys.

I’m proud to share that more than half of my clients come from referrals. It speaks volumes about the need for coaching among folks who are first-gen, nontraditional, BIPOC, parenting students, neurodivergent, disabled, and others navigating academia with full lives and systemic challenges.

I know from experience how so many of us need support beyond what academia alone can offer. Coaching can provide the structure, encouragement, and personalized strategies we all need to thrive in grad programs and beyond.

If you’re someone who feels overwhelmed or know someone who’s struggling to finish their dissertation or thesis, I’d love to connect. Together, we can create a sustainable plan to help you cross the finish line with confidence and without burning out.

25/11/2024

A grad student recently sent me this exciting photo from an anthropology conference—look what she spotted! My co-authored book, Is Grad School For Me? Demystifying the Application Process for First-Gen BIPOC Students, proudly displayed at the University of California Press booth! 📖✨

This moment is extra special because this year, I learned that our book is now being taught in graduate prep curriculums at UC Davis and Cal State LA, among others. If you’ve spotted our book being taught in a classroom, please let us know as we’re keeping track of the book’s impact that way.

Seeing how it’s reaching classrooms, conferences, and the hands of students who need it most is a dream come true and would make the former first-gen Chicanita undergrad in me so proud!

For first-gen, low-income, and nontraditional students of color, the path to grad school often feels overwhelming and isolating. That’s why we wrote this book—to provide guidance, reassurance, and actionable strategies to help you thrive in your higher ed journey.

If you’ve read it, I’d love to hear your thoughts! Or if you’ve seen it in the wild (like at this conference), tag me or send me a photo—it makes our day!

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What is one of the biggest challenges for first-gen students and professionals alike? The endless stream of service requests, commitments, and responsibilities. In my recent “Thriving in Community” workshop, I shared this simple yet powerful question: If I say YES to this, what am I saying NO to? We often think about adding more to our plates, but thriving isn’t just about doing more, it’s also about protecting what matters most. Your non-negotiables, your values, your time and energy, they deserve protection, like a mama bear guarding her cubs. Trust me, as a mom of two, I feel that even more now! I love guiding students and professionals through these mindset shifts, helping them to set boundaries that still honor their relationships, make intentional valued-aligned choices, and show up as their best selves without overwhelm or burnout. Want to bring this conversation to your students or team? Let’s talk. I’d love to lead a session that helps them navigate their commitments with confidence. DM me, like this post, or tag someone who needs to hear this. [ID: Video with a still headshot of Dra. Yvette wearing a slate blue blazer, white top, and clear glasses. She’s standing outdoors with her straight dark brown hair smiling and posing for the camera. The video also has captions from an audio clip of a recent workshop where she talks about the importance of identifying and protecting your nonnegotiables.] #ThrivingInCommunity #FirstGenLeadership #BoundariesMatter

TL;DR: This is the year we have to get our ish together. [ID: Video of Dra. Yvette with olive skin, dark brown hair in a ponytail, glasses, and wearing a fluffy light blue zipped sweater sitting down and talking about how 2025 is the year we need to get our act together and find ways to take care of ourselves now and in the long run.]

Unboxing my Signal Award! 🏆

Here to share a touching moment that showcases exactly why we wrote Is Grad School for Me?: Demystifying the Application Process for First-Gen BIPOC Students. My co-author and I received an uplifting email from a director of a McNair Scholars Program, expressing how our book has resonated with their first-gen, low-income, and BIPOC students. Hearing that students see themselves in the stories we shared, feel represented, and are finding our guidance useful is incredibly meaningful. It’s being adopted into curriculums, including the Mellon Mays program on their campus, and impacting many lives. This shows the power of incorporating storytelling, representation, research, and accessibility in your writing! I hope it also reminds you to never give up on your dreams to write that book that you know the world needs. Thank you to everyone who has supported us on this book publishing journey—your support and readership means more than you could imagine. #HigherEducation #FirstGen #BIPOCStudents #GradSchool

The only reason I can do any of this is thanks to the support of my community who has my back. This year I became a published author, a certified coach, an award-winning podcaster, a LinkedIn Learning instructor. I also joined a speaker’s bureau and a podcasting network. None of this would be possible on my own. I still have many days out of the week where I struggle. I still experience pain daily. I still get easily overwhelmed. But I show up whenever I can because I know I’m not doing any of this alone. I do my best to make things easier on myself. I do my best to do good-enough work. I do my best to ask for help. “How do you do it all?,” they ask. I don’t. Instead, I focus on tasks that move the needle forward. I aim for progress, not perfection. And of course, I ask for help. Who is part of your support system? And how are you ensuring that you can keep reaching your goals sustainably? [ID: Video of Dra. Yvette sitting down and wearing a black and white button down top, black headband, and small silver hoop earrings.]

Last week I was honored to be invited to speak as part of Cal Poly Pomona’s First-Gen Week. My co-author and I were invited to give a talk on our book, Is Grad School For Me?: Demystifying the Application Process for First-Gen BIPOC Students. We received feedback from several students in the audience. Most of the participants found our session valuable and want to hear us speak again. Here are some noteworthy comments they shared: “Very empowering presentation and makes me feel motivated to apply for grad school. In addition to feeling more prepared as to what is to come for the future. Instead of feeling lost about the grad school process.” “This event was moving, inspiring, and reaffirming that students of color have a community to support them with their higher education endeavors.” “Very informative and the perfect amount of information without dragging on.” “It was really engaging!” Shout out to Dr. Brianne Dávila, the CPP College of Letters, Arts, and Social Sciences, and all of the co-sponsors who helped make this happen! Thank you for helping to make this event a possibility! We look forward to future collaborations. [ID: Video of Dra. Yvette, an olive skinned Chicana with dark brown hair in a ponytail, wearing yellow beaded flower earrings and a grey CPP “I am first” shirt.]

Hang on to the people that matter. Show your appreciation. Shout out to my femtee, Jeanette, for her generosity and support. We need community now more than ever. 🫶🏽 [Video of Dra. Yvette, an olive skinned Chinana wearing a red USC Rossier School of Education shirt with a yellow headband and sunflower wooden earrings.]

Despite my current state of anxiety and dread, I’m reminding myself of the things that bring me joy. Today the thing that’s making me excited is launching my brand new FEMTOR merch! I’ve been debating doing this for months now. Some of my femtees might recall me mentioning it at the beginning of this year and then I let fear and overwhelm get in my way. That is until the @wocpodcasters community hosted a merch workshop and it reminded me that I don’t have to overcomplicate things to be able to offer something that can bring a smile to someone’s face. My merch collection features fun items like a holographic sticker, an unscented candle, and even a premium organic hoodie (not pictured in the video). Check out the items by going to [gradschoolfemtoring.com/shop](http://gradschoolfemtoring.com/shop)! Thanks for your support! [ID: Video of Dra. Yvette wearing a red shirt, black cardigan, tan headband, and black beaded earrings. In the video she shares merch items including two stickers and a candle.] #GradSchoolFemtoring #FemtorStickers #FemtorMerch

In episode 292 of the Grad School Femtoring Podcast, I share exciting news about winning a Signal Award and reflect on the power of visibility, community, and consistency. I discuss my podcasting journey and the encouragement and support I’ve received that led to the award. I also talk about the significance of representation in media and awards and the lessons that I’ve gained in setting intentions and embracing opportunities even while experiencing moments of doubt. 🎧 → gradschoolfemtoring.com/podcast [Video with a close up shot of Dra. Yvette, an olive-skinned Chicana wearing Dodger blue and white colors, dark brown mid length hair, tan over ear headphones, and glasses while sitting on a chair with a purple throw blanket over it. She discusses how you need to do more than hard work to achieve success, you also need visibility and community.]

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