The Bad Influence Podcast with Bjordan Banderas

27/08/2026

26/08/2026

Why do you feel like you have to be the smartest
person in every room.

Nobody sits a kid down and says your worth depends on always knowing more than everybody else. But you learned it anyway.

In this episode, I trace exactly where this belief actually came from.

You learned it the same way you learn anything that keeps working. Every time you had the answer first, something good happened, attention, approval, a sense that you mattered in that room. Every time somebody else had it first, something in you deflated, and you worked harder to make sure it didn’t happen again.

Somewhere in there, being the smartest person in the room stopped being a skill you had and started being the whole floor you stand on.

What did you get for having the answer first as a kid that you’ve been chasing ever since? Leave it in the comments below.

Be the bad influence in your own story.

Full episode — Bad Influence Podcast #434

26/08/2026

If you get defensive when your partner corrects you, feel threatened by a smart woman, or shut down and go cold after being proven wrong, watch this. That heat that rises when she’s right and you’re not has nothing to do with her.

It’s Relationship Wednesday on The Bad Influence Podcast with Bjordan Banderas.

In this episode, I share my perspective on why calling her “too much” is usually a man protecting an identity that was never actually hers to threaten.

If you’ve made a joke at her expense right after she corrected you, gone cold instead of just admitting you were wrong, or noticed her start softening how smart she actually is around you, this episode shows you exactly what’s driving that.

By the end of this, you’ll understand where that need to always be right came from, and what it’s already cost you in the relationship you say you want.

What actually happens in your chest the moment a woman corrects you in front of other people and she’s right?

Drop your answer in the comments. Subscribe if this named something you’ve been calling standards.

Be the bad influence in your own story.

https://linktr.ee/bjordanthebadinfluence

If you get defensive when your partner corrects you, feel threatene...

26/08/2026

The Version Everyone Rewarded Isn’t the Real You

You built a version of yourself just to get applause.

The easygoing one. The one who never makes it weird. The one who agrees fast and complains never. That version gets invited back every time. You just don’t know if the real you would.

Here’s where that started. Somewhere early, the real version of you got a reaction you didn’t like, too much, too loud, too honest, too something. And the edited version got smiles instead. So you kept the edit and buried the original, and you’ve been running that trade for years without calling it a trade.

Feel what performing costs you by the end of a day. The jaw that’s been smiling since noon and won’t fully unclench. The tiredness that hits the second you’re finally alone, heavier than the day should’ve earned.

That’s not being social. That’s holding a shape that isn’t yours for hours at a time.

Here’s what staying edited is actually stealing. People keep applauding a character, and you keep collecting applause that was never actually for you. You’ve built real relationships this way, and every one of them is a relationship the real you was never actually part of.

You call that being liked. It’s actually being unknown by everyone who claps for you.

The version everyone rewarded was never the real you, it was the safest version you could find. Safety isn’t the same as being seen, and being seen is the only thing that was ever going to fill the gap you keep feeling in a room full of people who like you.

Let one real thing through today. One unedited opinion, one honest no, one moment where you don’t perform the reaction you know will land.

Which version of you has been getting the applause, and when’s the last time the real one actually showed up?

Remember the choice is yours.

25/08/2026

Why do you call yourself easy to work with when you’re actually just quiet.

You already know the dim version isn’t who you actually are.

In this episode, I call out the real thing that’s been standing between you and the answer.

You’ve known it every time that tightness rose in your throat right before you swallowed the true thing. You’ve known it every time you called the shrinking “being easy to work with” and felt something in you go quiet in protest.

You can keep calling that professionalism. It won’t change who’s actually been deciding not to test the room’s limit.

What have you been calling professionalism that’s actually just you deciding not to test the room? Leave it in the comments below.

Be the bad influence in your own story.

Full episode — Bad Influence Podcast #433

24/08/2026

How to speak up even when you’re not sure how it’ll be received.

Pick the room you’ve been dimming yourself in the longest. Say the true thing at full strength anyway.

In this episode, I give you the exact move to make tonight.

Say the true thing at full strength even though there’s no guarantee it lands the way you want. Let your throat tighten. Speak anyway. That’s what showing up actually means, not managing yourself down to fit, bringing the real thing and finally finding out what it does.

You might find out you’re capable of a lot more than the rooms you’ve been shrinking for ever gave you credit for.

Which room have you been dimming yourself in the longest? Leave it in the comments below.

Be the bad influence in your own story.

Full episode — Bad Influence Podcast #433

24/08/2026

If you shrink yourself so others feel comfortable, get called "too intense" or "too much," or hold back the truth to keep the peace, watch this.

Somewhere, someone is going to tell you you're too much. And they're going to frame it like it's your problem to fix.

It's Mindset Monday on The Bad Influence Podcast with Bjordan Banderas.

In this episode, I share my perspective on why the version of you that makes people uncomfortable might be exactly the version they need to see.

If you swallow the true thing to keep a room comfortable, mistake dimming yourself for being easy to work with, or have quietly started believing your intensity is a liability instead of an asset, this episode names exactly what that's costing you.

By the end of this, you'll see the difference between a room that actually can't hold your fire and one that just told you its own limits and called it feedback about you.

How many times have you made yourself smaller because someone else's comfort felt more urgent than your own truth?

Drop your answer in the comments. Subscribe if this named something you've been calling professionalism.

Be the bad influence in your own story.

https://linktr.ee/bjordanthebadinfluence

If you shrink yourself so others feel comfortable, get called "too ...

24/08/2026

Why do you live at 60 percent without ever noticing it happened.

You didn’t decide to live at sixty percent. You practiced it until it stopped feeling like a choice.

In this episode, I point out the exact moment this stopped being a choice and became your default.

It started to feel like normal, like pace, like being realistic. It’s not realistic. It’s a habit built shift by shift, and it didn’t stay at work.

It followed you into your health, into your relationships, into the goals you keep saying you’ll commit to eventually. You’ve been eventually-ing your whole life the same way you’ve been clocking in your whole career.

What have you been eventually-ing in your own life the same way you clock in at work? Leave it in the comments below.

Be the bad influence in your own story.

Full episode — Bad Influence Podcast #430

23/08/2026

Why do you keep putting off the thing that matters most to you.
One day you’re going to run out of time to find out what you were actually capable of.

In this episode, I lay out exactly what you stand to lose if this doesn’t change.

Not metaphorically. Literally. Years don’t wait for you to finally feel ready. The version of you that could have gone all in on the marriage, the health, the dream, that version doesn’t get to try again once the window closes.

The actual danger was never failing once you finally tried. It’s standing at the end of this, still wondering, because you made sure you’d never have to find out.

What are you actually protecting yourself from by staying cautious with the thing that matters most? Leave it in the comments below.

Be the bad influence in your own story.

Full episode — Bad Influence Podcast #430