Happy tinit (2025)

30/09/2025

Some People Don’t Deserve Access to Your Peace

People love to preach accountability until it’s their turn to practice it. They’ll say, “You could’ve talked to me.” But the truth is—you couldn’t. Because every time you try, they don’t listen. They deflect. They twist your words into attacks. And somehow, they always end up playing the victim.

Conversations with them aren’t healing—they’re draining. You leave feeling unheard, misunderstood, and exhausted, as if you’ve been through a battle you never signed up for.

And that’s when you realize something important: you don’t owe your peace to someone who only shows up to win an argument, not to understand you.

Boundaries aren’t disrespect. Silence isn’t weakness. Sometimes the healthiest thing you can do for your mental and emotional health is to step back and protect your energy.

Because not everyone is capable of honest dialogue. Not everyone wants to grow. Some people just want to be right. And you don’t have to sacrifice your sanity for them to feel powerful.

Protect your peace. Walk away. Let them talk. Your healing matters more than their ego.

30/09/2025

When most people hear the word “abuse,” their mind instantly jumps to physical violence—bruises, scars, or visible injuries. But the reality is much deeper, much darker, and much more layered. Abuse does not always come with marks on the body; sometimes it leaves wounds on the mind, the heart, and the soul that nobody else can see. And that’s exactly why it’s so dangerous.

Verbal abuse is often overlooked, yet it has the power to destroy a person’s confidence. Constant criticism, shouting, humiliation, and name-calling may not break bones, but they break spirits. Words can echo inside someone’s head for years, replaying again and again until they begin to believe the lies.

Mental abuse is even more subtle. It’s manipulation, gaslighting, and controlling behavior that makes you question your own sanity. It’s when someone convinces you that your feelings are invalid, that your memories are wrong, and that your reality isn’t real. This type of abuse forces you into a constant state of confusion, making it nearly impossible to trust yourself.

Emotional abuse is perhaps the hardest to recognize because it hides behind the mask of “love.” It looks like guilt-tripping, silent treatment, or emotional blackmail. It’s when affection is given and withdrawn like a weapon, leaving you desperate for approval and terrified of rejection. Over time, it erodes your self-worth until you feel unworthy of love altogether.

Psychological abuse takes control of the mind. It’s intimidation, threats, and fear used as tools of dominance. Unlike physical abuse, which can heal with time, psychological scars remain hidden yet heavy, shaping how a person sees themselves and the world around them.

Financial abuse is another powerful form that people often dismiss. It happens when someone uses money to control another person’s freedom. Restricting access to finances, forcing dependency, or controlling every purchase may not look like abuse from the outside, but it strips away independence and leaves victims feeling trapped.

And of course, physical abuse is the most visible—but not always the most damaging. Hitting, slapping, pushing, or any form of physical harm leaves marks, but what lingers is the trauma, the fear, and the loss of safety in a place that should feel like home.

Different forms, different faces, but the truth remains the same: abuse is abuse. There is no “less harmful” or “not that bad.” If it takes away your peace, your dignity, or your freedom, it’s abuse.

Healing begins the moment you acknowledge this truth. No excuse justifies abusive behavior, no matter how it’s packaged. Recognizing the signs, setting boundaries, and walking away from toxic patterns isn’t weakness—it’s survival.

Because at the end of the day, scars may fade, but dignity and self-worth must remain. And the message is clear for anyone who doubts it: abuse is abuse. Always.

29/09/2025

I Don’t Understand How Someone Can Tell So Many Lies and Never Feel Bad About It

It’s one of the most heartbreaking things to realize—that some people lie so easily, so naturally, that it feels like second nature to them. They’ll look you straight in the eye, tell you what you want to hear, and sleep peacefully at night without a single ounce of guilt.

What’s worse is not just the lie itself, but the effort they put into maintaining it. The stories, the excuses, the fake emotions—they weave a whole world of deception and expect you to live in it. And when the truth finally comes out, you’re left wondering: did they ever feel anything real, or was it all an act?

The truth is, not everyone carries a conscience the same way. Some people are so consumed by selfishness, insecurity, or manipulation that honesty no longer exists in their dictionary. To them, lying isn’t wrong—it’s survival, it’s control, it’s convenience.

But here’s the part they’ll never admit: lies always have a way of catching up. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but eventually. And when that happens, the trust they lost will be worth far more than whatever they gained from the lie.

So don’t waste your peace trying to understand liars. Just remember this: their lies reveal who they are, not who you are. And your truth will always outshine their deception.

29/09/2025

How A narcissist Sabotages
Your success
"I am going to put you through so much stress that it will be impossible for you to succeed.
You end up living in constant survival mode and hoping to just pull through."
Then the narcissist berates you for not achieving your goals One of the most damaging realities of dealing with a narcissist is that their goal isn’t just to hurt you emotionally—it’s to sabotage your growth, your peace, and even your success.

A narcissist thrives on control. They cannot stand to see you rise, because your success threatens their fragile ego. Instead of celebrating your progress, they deliberately create chaos. They distract you with unnecessary arguments, constant criticism, and toxic mind games designed to keep you in a state of survival rather than growth.

Imagine this: you’re focused on building your future, but every step forward is met with stress they intentionally create. Suddenly, your energy shifts from working on your goals to defending yourself, explaining yourself, or simply trying to survive another one of their emotional storms.

That’s the trap. The narcissist puts you in survival mode. And when you’re constantly just trying to get through the day, there’s little energy left for thriving, for succeeding, for becoming who you’re meant to be.

Then comes the cruelest part—they turn around and berate you for not achieving enough. They call you lazy, unmotivated, or a failure, completely ignoring that they are the very reason you’re stuck. They clip your wings and then mock you for not flying.

This is psychological sabotage at its finest. And it’s why many people feel like they’ve lost years of their life while entangled with a narcissist. They didn’t lose ambition, they lost peace. They didn’t lose intelligence, they lost the space to focus. They didn’t lose talent, they lost freedom.

The good news? Once you recognize the pattern, you can break it. Narcissists thrive in silence and confusion, but when you shine light on their tactics, they lose their power.

Here’s how you reclaim your success:
• Protect your peace first. Success cannot grow in chaos.
• Detach emotionally. Don’t feed their need for reactions.
• Redirect your energy. The energy you waste on defending yourself is the same energy that can build your future.
• Set boundaries. The less access they have to disrupt your world, the more space you create for growth.

Remember, your dreams don’t belong to them—they belong to you. And no matter how much stress they try to create, your potential is greater than their sabotage.

The most powerful revenge against a narcissist is simple: succeed anyway.

29/09/2025

When a Narcissist says,

"You need to stay away from my ex. He/she is Crazy."

What they really mean is,

"Stay away from them because I am afraid they will tell you the truth about me."

This is one of the oldest tricks in the narcissist’s playbook. They know that if you ever had an open conversation with their ex, the carefully constructed mask they wear around you would begin to crumble. Their ex has seen behind the curtain. They know the lies, the gaslighting, the manipulation, the cheating, the abuse—and the narcissist is terrified you’ll find out. So instead of letting you form your own judgment, they rush to plant seeds of doubt in your mind.

By calling their ex “crazy,” they’re not only trying to silence that person but also conditioning you to mistrust them without question. They want you to think, “Well, if their ex is unhinged, then anything they say must be exaggerated or made up.” This way, if the truth ever does reach you, you’ll second-guess it and side with the narcissist.

It’s also a way for them to play the victim. By painting themselves as the one who “escaped a toxic partner,” they can gain your sympathy while shifting blame for the failed relationship entirely onto their ex. This tactic isolates you, manipulates your perspective, and keeps you from seeing the full picture.

The irony is, most of the time, the “crazy ex” is simply someone who was hurt, gaslit, and broken down by the very same patterns you’re now experiencing. Narcissists recycle the same story with every partner. The ex before you was “crazy.” You, right now, are “different, special, understanding.” But in time, if you don’t see through the mask, you too could end up as their next “crazy ex” in someone else’s warning story.

28/09/2025

A narcissistic man is often a son with a mother wound.
From childhood, he experiences a relationship with his mother that is far from healthy—sometimes he is rejected, sometimes neglected, and other times worshipped as the golden child. But even the golden child doesn’t escape damage. On the surface, he may have been adored, praised, and held up as perfect, yet that adoration often comes with invisible chains: control, manipulation, and impossible expectations. The love he received was conditional, transactional, or stifling. He grows up carrying confusion, shame, and a quiet rage that he doesn’t yet understand.

When he enters adulthood, these wounds are rarely healed. They live inside him, shaping how he sees relationships, intimacy, and power. In love, he cannot truly see you as an equal partner because he has never been seen or valued as a whole person himself. Unhealed, he unconsciously repeats the patterns of his upbringing. You stop being his partner. Instead, you are cast into the role of the mother he never truly had.

His unresolved anger and disappointment toward his mother—anger he may have buried, denied, or rationalized for years—now finds a new outlet: you. Every criticism, every judgment, every controlling behavior you notice is not about you alone; it’s the echo of his childhood pain. He expects you to manage his emotions, to soothe his insecurities, and to repair the void left by a mother who never fully gave him what he needed. And when you fail, as any human would, the rage he carries explodes.

This isn’t conscious cruelty. Often, he isn’t even fully aware of the depth of his projection. But the effect on you is real and painful. You are left feeling confused, drained, and frustrated, wondering why the love you give is never enough, why his anger seems unearned, why the man you fell for seems so distant and unreachable.

Understanding this doesn’t excuse his behavior, but it explains the cycle. It shows why a narcissistic man can never truly treat you as a partner until he faces the pain he inherited as a child. And until he does, you are not his equal—you are a placeholder for the mother wound he cannot escape.

The heartbreak is not just in the actions but in the realization that love alone cannot fix what life broke long before you arrived. And the hardest part? Knowing that no amount of patience, kindness, or sacrifice on your part will heal him for you. You can only heal yourself, and only then can you choose whether to stay in the orbit of a man who carries a past you didn’t create.

28/09/2025

HE'S NOT TELLING PEOPLE WHAT HE DID.
HE'S TELLING THEM WHO YOU BECAME BECAUSE OF WHAT HE DID.

That's the game. That's the trick of a narcissist. He will never admit to the lies, the betrayals, the nights you cried yourself to sleep because of his actions. He won't tell people about the promises he broke, the gaslighting that left you questioning your reality, the isolation he forced you into, or the countless times he made you feel like your emotions were illegitimate. Every word, every action that caused you pain, every time he dismissed your feelings—none of that exists in the story he tells.

No—he leaves all of that out. The truth about how he manipulated your thoughts, how he twisted your love into obedience, how he punished you for boundaries and independence—it's completely erased. Every cruel word, every selfish act, every betrayal is gone. What remains is a carefully curated image of himself as someone constantly wronged, someone who had no choice but to endure your "irrational" behavior.

Instead, he tells the story from the middle, not the beginning. He focuses on your anger, your frustration, your tears, your silence, your distance—the natural human reactions to being mistreated—while ignoring the cause. He paints you as the problem, as if your pain, your anger, your growth, and your attempts to protect yourself sprang out of nowhere.

He doesn't say, "I broke her trust." He says, "She's crazy and paranoid." He doesn't say, "I hurt her over and over." He says, "She's so angry all the time." He doesn't say, "I neglected her needs." He says, "She's never satisfied." He doesn't say, "I lied, cheated, or manipulated her." He says, "She overreacts. She’s too emotional. She’s unreasonable."

He carefully crafts a narrative where your transformation—your distance, your anger, your tears, your guardedness—looks like your fault alone. He paints himself as the victim of your change, as if your reactions were sudden, inexplicable, and entirely of your own making. Every moment of his abuse, every act of manipulation, every word meant to control or harm you—vanished. Only your response remains visible, and it is twisted to look monstrous.

And the most insidious part? He convinces others to believe it. Friends, family, coworkers—they see only the version he presents. They never see the late nights you spent crying, the anxious thoughts you battled, the emotional exhaustion he caused. They see your anger, your frustration, your attempts to protect yourself—and they believe he must have been justified.

This is how he rewrites history. This is how he maintains control, even after the relationship is over. He doesn’t need to confess, apologize, or admit wrongdoing. He doesn’t need to take responsibility. His power comes from shaping perception, from making the victim of his actions appear as the perpetrator in everyone else’s eyes.

Every tear you shed, every boundary you set, every moment you finally found the courage to stand up for yourself becomes evidence of your "failure," not of his abuse. And if you try to defend yourself or tell your side of the story, he labels you as defensive, aggressive, unstable. He anticipates your words and twists them, because he knows the game better than anyone—you are always a step behind in a story he controls.

That’s the cruel genius of a narcissist. He doesn’t need to tell the truth. He only needs to control the narrative. And when he does, he rewrites reality, placing himself as the wronged hero and you as the villain, even though every wound, every scar, every sleepless night was created by him.

27/09/2025

Some people don't hate you because you hurt them, they hate you because you survived what they did to you. They hate that you found the strength to keep going when they expected you to crumble, that you refused to let their cruelty define your story. They resent the courage it took for you to face the darkness they imposed and still come out standing, whole in spirit even if scarred in heart. Every step you took toward healing, every moment you reclaimed your voice, every choice you made to love yourself despite their attempts to diminish you became a mirror they could not bear to look into.

They despise that you turned pain into power, that you transformed suffering into growth, that you emerged stronger where they only left wreckage. The very act of surviving, of thriving in spite of them, is a truth that unsettles them, a reminder of their own weakness, cowardice, and failures. You embody the life and strength they tried to strip from you, and that is unbearable for them. They see your freedom, your confidence, your unshakable sense of self, and they feel a gnawing bitterness, because they cannot reconcile that someone they sought to control or destroy has not only endured but flourished.

Your survival is not merely endurance—it is a defiance of their attempts to manipulate, diminish, or erase you. It is proof that their cruelty could not dictate your worth, nor could their hatred dictate your path. Each smile you reclaim, each moment of peace you nurture, each boundary you enforce, is a testament to your unwavering spirit. And the truth is, your survival casts a shadow over their insecurities, their guilt, their failures, and they will forever be haunted by the knowledge that what they tried to break only made you stronger. You are living proof that strength is forged in fire, that resilience grows in the soil of suffering, and that no amount of malice, deceit, or control can alter the essence of someone who refuses to be defeated.

27/09/2025

A narcissist doesn't want to raise children, they want to be SEEN as a good parent. Their goal isn’t to nurture, guide, or support their children in a healthy way — it’s to maintain an image. They crave admiration, applause, and validation from the outside world more than they care about the emotional wellbeing of the child they brought into this world. The camera comes out for social media, but DISAPPEARS when real parenting work begins. They post pictures of happy moments, staged smiles, and carefully curated family scenes, yet when the spotlight is gone, so is their effort.

Behind closed doors, parenting becomes more about control, appearances, and manipulation than love, patience, and sacrifice. Their public face and private behavior tell two completely different stories. To outsiders, they look like the “perfect” parent — the one who shows up to events, posts proud photos, and makes speeches about family values. But at home, the child often feels invisible, unheard, and neglected. The narcissist dismisses their needs, invalidates their feelings, and only pays attention when it benefits their own reputation.

The heartbreaking reality is that children of narcissists grow up learning that love is conditional. They are praised when they perform, when they make the narcissist look good, and when they can be used as props in the performance of “perfect family life.” But when those children have needs of their own — when they cry, struggle, or ask for support — they are met with coldness, irritation, or even punishment.

Narcissistic parenting isn’t really parenting at all. It’s performance. It’s about being admired as a parent, not actually being one. And the saddest part is, while the world praises their image, the children quietly carry the wounds of growing up with someone who was more concerned with appearances than with love.

27/09/2025

Emotional abuse can kill you.

Yes, you heard me right.

It doesn’t just hurt in the moment—it seeps into your bones, your thoughts, and your very sense of self. It slowly, quietly, and relentlessly eats away at your soul. Day by day, insult by insult, manipulation by manipulation, it erodes your confidence, your peace, and your emotional stability. It leaves invisible scars that affect the way you see yourself, the way you trust others, and even the way your body responds to stress. Emotional abuse is not harmless. It is a slow, destructive force that can leave you feeling hollow, exhausted, and completely alone.

If you stay around emotionally abusive people, they will eventually destroy you. They thrive on your self-doubt, on your kindness, and on your vulnerability. They twist reality, gaslight you, belittle your achievements, and isolate you from anyone who might love or support you. And if you let them, they will dismantle everything that makes you feel whole and strong. You might not notice it at first—sometimes the wounds are quiet, invisible, disguised as love, attention, or concern. But the damage is real, deep, and lasting.

Get away. Not tomorrow, not when it’s convenient—now. Protect yourself. Shield your heart. Guard your mind. Refuse to participate in their games. Your peace, your health, your life are worth far more than their toxic influence. Become allergic to abusive people. Let your instincts guide you. Let the mere thought of their presence trigger an automatic “no.” Program yourself so that everything about them—their words, their tone, their manipulations, their very energy—pushes you in the opposite direction.

Surround yourself with those who lift you, who respect you, who see your worth. Make your home, your mind, and your life sacred spaces where no abuser can enter. Learn to trust yourself, to honor your own needs, to validate your own feelings. Every step you take away from them is a step toward freedom, toward clarity, and toward a life where you can breathe, smile, and feel safe again.

Remember: emotional abuse is not just painful—it is dangerous. Protect yourself as fiercely as you would your life, because in many ways, it is. Your wellbeing, your future, and your very soul depend on it.

27/09/2025

Narcissists don't date losers, they are losers.

They deliberately choose people who are stronger, smarter, kinder, or more accomplished than they are, and then devote themselves to systematically undermining everything that makes their partner shine. Every success you have becomes a threat to them, every compliment you receive feels like a challenge to their fragile ego. Slowly, almost imperceptibly at first, they chip away at your confidence, twisting your achievements into something unworthy, making you doubt yourself, your choices, and even your reality.

They don’t just want to be with you—they want to control you, dominate you, and bend you to their narrative. They will gaslight you, rewrite events, and weaponize your vulnerabilities against you. They will isolate you from the people who see your worth, convince you that your feelings are overreactions, and make you feel as though your success or happiness is somehow undeserved. The person you were before them—strong, vibrant, self-assured—starts to feel like a distant memory.

And the cruelest part? They do all of this while pretending to be charming, loving, or attentive. To the outside world, they seem flawless. To you, they seem unpredictable, exhausting, and impossible to please. Every effort you make to hold onto your sense of self is met with criticism, neglect, or manipulation, until you start to wonder if you ever really mattered at all.

Narcissists aren’t in relationships to grow, to love, or to support. They are in them to conquer, to dominate, and to feel powerful at someone else’s expense. They thrive on the emotional labor, the energy, and the light of those who are genuinely good, because it highlights the emptiness within themselves. The more they can bring you down, the more they can feel superior—if only temporarily.

Being involved with a narcissist is like holding a candle in a windstorm—they don’t just dim your light, they try to s***f it out entirely, because your brightness reminds them of everything they lack and can never truly be. And yet, once you recognize the game, once you understand their patterns, you reclaim your power, your worth, and your light, leaving them to face the emptiness they’ve carried all along.

26/09/2025

If you feel like you need to record conversations to prove you are not crazy, a liar, or delusional, you are already trapped in an unhealthy relationship—most likely with a narcissist. No one should make you question your own memory, your perception, or your sense of reality. No one should make you feel like you need evidence just to defend your own truth. When someone consistently manipulates, gaslights, or twists your words, it chips away at your confidence and your sense of self. It’s exhausting, terrifying, and deeply unfair.

Healthy relationships are built on trust, respect, and open communication—not constant vigilance and self-protection. You should never feel like you are on trial in your own life, forced to prove that your feelings are valid or that your reality is real. Feeling the need to record conversations is not paranoia—it’s a survival tactic, a shield you’ve been forced to raise because someone refuses to take responsibility for their words or actions.

This is not love, and it’s not normal. It’s a warning sign, a red flag that your emotional safety is at risk. Recognizing this is the first step toward reclaiming your power. You deserve relationships where your voice is heard without question, where your emotions are respected, and where you don’t have to carry the weight of someone else’s manipulation. You deserve peace, not proof; respect, not doubt; and freedom from the constant need to justify your existence to someone who should be your partner, not your accuser.

Happy tinit

30/09/2025

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