We the Parents Podcast

22/08/2025

22/08/2025

22/08/2025

"Science is catching up with common sense: the best parent is both parents."- In this article, Dr. Don Hubin highlights the finding done by Dr. Sarah Blaffer Hrdy on the biological foundations of nurturing paternity.

This won’t be everyone’s cup of tea. But those who are interested in the evolutionary bases for human behavior might find this of interest. Sarah Blaffer Hrdy is a world renowned anthropologist and pri mato logist who has made important contributions to evolutionary psychology and sociobiology. ...

20/08/2025

“Children who are apologized to, learn how to apologize.” J. Milburn ⁣⁣
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I am asked quite frequently how we teach children to feel remorse. I don’t think we really teach remorse, I think it’s intrinsic. I think we can be taught shame and guilt which looks a lot like remorse but is much harder on us from a psychological perspective. Offering genuine apologies to your children, letting them see you apologize with grace and humility, when you hurt someone else, is how we teach what to DO with our feelings of remorse. They will experience feelings of remorse, it’s what meaning they make of it, what they do with it. Do they feel so much shame they shut down, struggle to express their remorse? Do they become a puddle of shame, apologizing and apologizing, fearing upsetting others? Or do they feel and then express genuine remorse? Able to move on… rupture and repair. ⁣⁣
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To learn more about the process of rupture and repair, get my latest 📖 ⁣
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Finding Your Calm: A Responsive Parents Guide to Self-Regulation and Co-Regulation⁣⁣
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Link in bio
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20/08/2025

20/08/2025

There's the type. Personality disordered or mentally ill, who knows!

19/08/2025

18/08/2025

Millennial dads are redefining fatherhood, now dedicating nearly three times as much time to childcare compared to fathers in 1965—averaging around 8 hours per week versus just 2.5 then.  This shift is more than logistical—57% of millennial fathers view being a parent as a core part of their identity, nearly on par with mothers. 

But the transition isn’t without challenges. Despite increased involvement, millennial dads are often caught in a tug-of-war between evolving expectations at home and rigid workplace norms. Many struggle to balance modern caregiving with job demands in a system that still champions traditional breadwinner roles and offers limited paternity leave. 

17/08/2025

Why Good Fathers Get Treated Like Deadbeats

Let’s face the honest truth.

Some of the best fathers in the world—
Men who show up.
Men who sacrifice.
Men who work two jobs just to make sure their kids never lack—

Are the same men courts, ex-wives, and society label as “deadbeats.”

And here’s the cold truth:
It’s not because they failed.
It’s because the system is designed to punish them.

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1. Divorce Doesn’t End Marriage—It Just Ends Fatherhood

When a marriage ends, the mother almost always gets custody.

Not because she’s more capable—
But because the law assumes she is.

So overnight, a man goes from full-time dad to weekend visitor.
From protector to ATM.
From father to “baby daddy.”

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2. His Money Is Wanted—Not His Presence

A good father says: “I’ll pay, and I’ll stay.”
But the system says: “Pay, but we don’t want you around.”

Child support is enforced like a military draft.

But visitation rights?

Those are “suggestions.”

If she blocks him, delays him, or poisons the kids against him—

Nobody enforces his rights with the same aggression.

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3. Alienation Is Treated Like a Joke

When mothers block fathers, it’s “protecting the child.”

When fathers block mothers, it’s “abuse.”

The narrative is rigged.
And the kids grow up hearing one side—
That their dad “left.”
That he “doesn’t care.”
That he’s “a deadbeat.”

When in reality?
He was locked out by the system.

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4. Fatherhood Became a Business Model
Let’s be brutally honest.

For many women, motherhood is no longer sacrifice—
It’s a paycheck.

The man pays alimony.
He pays child support.
He pays legal fees.
And then he still gets labeled a failure.

She gets rewarded for cutting him out.
He gets punished for wanting to stay in.

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5. The Children Pay the Biggest Price

The irony?
The courts claim they act “in the best interest of the child.”

But statistics prove otherwise:
Children without active fathers face higher rates of crime, poverty, depression, and broken homes.

So when a good father gets treated like a deadbeat—
It’s not just the man who suffers.
It’s the child.
It’s the legacy.
It’s the nation.

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Final Word:

Good fathers don’t abandon their children.
They are abandoned by the system.

And until men wake up, unite, and demand change—
The lie will continue:
That deadbeat dads are everywhere.

When in reality?
The deadbeats are few—
But the good fathers being destroyed?
They’re everywhere.

— © ELONAIRES | Magnus Media