26/11/2025
Today would have been my 3 year Streamiversary. But instead, I am sitting here reflecting on the last 7 months since I stepped back from streaming.
More time with family. Running a business at a constant (& significant) loss monthly was killing me mentally & so many other ways.
I think Warzone was also a large part of that. The state of the game, the toxicity that came along with it, thinking I had to perform well to entertain instead of coming up with other ways to do that. It drained me mentally. It affected my life IRL. It was not sustainable.
When I sit back & reflect, I was headed in a terrible direction with content. One that would lead down a dark role. I focused on all the wrong things & paid little attention to the things that mattered. No matter how many creators I watched & listened to, I didn’t take their advice.
Perhaps there’s a path or time that I make my way back. I have the desire to. But I feel like I need to take my time and make sure I come back the right way. Focus on the right things, have my content direction aligned, and foster a positive & passionate environment.
Not just for me, but for the community. Maybe some of the old community will return, or maybe I basically start over. Either way, things had to change. I’ll also have to ensure my personal life is aligned to where I can focus on this when I need to. Who knows when, or if.
But one thing is for certain, I won’t be back until I know I’ll be able to do things right. Maybe it’s next week. Maybe it’s a year from now. Maybe it’s never. I can’t say for certain. But right now, I’m enjoying time with family, gaming when I can, & focusing on what matters.
This ended up longer than intended. But I ended up reflecting more as I started typing. Hope to see anyone still following me around when or if I start back streaming. Life is hard enough, don’t make it harder on yourself. Take care of each other. Much love. 🤘
-SouthernMetal
