Going Terribly

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Going Terribly

Your favorite punning linguists, Alice and Doug, talk about dumb stuff. And some smart stuff too. And not all of it is butt stuff. We promise. Mistaken identities.

Available wherever you listen to podcasts. Why is it called Going Terribly? Well, you see, when Alice and Doug get together, it’s always a beautiful disaster. Foodie shenanigans. Crossed wires. Sexy double entendres. You get the picture. And “going” is a euphemism for urination – well wait, urination doesn’t need a euphemism since it’s the technical term. But we can’t say pissing, right? Because i

t’s pubic for all to see. But ALSO: Doug doesn’t curse – yeah did you know Doug doesn’t curse? I didn’t until we started this podcast and holy crap there’s a typo but it’s kinda funny so maybe I’ll keep it because the long Facebook bio can be 10,000 characters max. That’s a f**kton of characters – oh sh*t I just said f**kton – wait, is this Alice right now? Or Doug? They’re like the same person. Two pees in a poodcast. BOOM. Nailed it.

08/07/2025

🎤🎧HAPPY TERRIBLE TUESDAY!🎧🎤

Alice just learned that a compliment she received years ago was plagiarized. And Doug believes she may have had a tryst with Cameron Crowe.
Meanwhile, they learn some rather disturbing news about some of America's favorite clothing, footwear, and soda.
Does everything have evil origins?*

EPISODE 249: TWO HIGHLY STRUNG SOUTHERN WOMEN IN A MOMENT OF GOD-GIVEN PLEASURE

Other discussion topics may include:
- Are there too many Sharknado movies? Or perhaps...not enough?
- Edward Norton's potentially unique relationship with God
- Just what IS a "magnificent fall"?
- Non-German German Chocolate Cake...but plenty of other less good German stuff
- Farting babies

Also get some extra educating with Doug's offering of It Went Terrible this month. He's a week late, so dock some points, but it's still a good one. Check it out at any of the links below or wherever you listen to podcasts.

🍎https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/going-terribly/id1531827350
🐶https://open.spotify.com/show/1bm2PuIKafoXHuuOJSTqIy
🎣https://castbox.fm/channel/id3326895?country=us

***s

*Probably.

01/07/2025

🎤🎧HAPPY TERRIBLE TUESDAY!🎧🎤

The D-Man and A-Girl are in the house!

Alice is out of steroids.
Doug may have eaten a block of eye shadow.
Alice thinks she may be more woman than some dude.
Doug can't stop saying "coochie."

EPISODE 248: TWO SHINY HAPPY MADE UP PEOPLE IN A QUESTIONABLE ALAN JACKSON SONG

Other discussion topics may include:
- That mood when you just want to watch a few hundred people drown
- A 12-year old's contract to not have children
- How to tick off the National Persimmon Alliance
- Could Tom have just been trying to get with Jerry?
- That Famous Amos cookie fella was actually really awesome. No, seriously.

The stage is set.
Witness the chaos.
Click on any of the links below or find Going Terribly wherever you listen to podcasts.

🍎https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/going-terribly/id1531827350
🐶https://open.spotify.com/show/1bm2PuIKafoXHuuOJSTqIy
🎣https://castbox.fm/channel/id3326895?country=us

24/06/2025

🎤🎧HAPPY TERRIBLE TUESDAY!🎧🎤

Happy birthday, Mr. Disney!

(the other one)

EPISODE 247: TWO ALOBAMA HOG FARMERS IN A PANTLESS FIGHT

The episode has a depressing start before finally getting into all the b***r and ni**le hair talk you've grown to love. Or at least expect. This week Alice gears up to run her annual Summer Playwriting Workshop while Doug discovers he's not a boy, but not quite a man.

Other discussion topics may include:
- What if Dr. Seuss were a podiatrist?
- Mel Brooks vs. Kumar. Finally.
- Never bring up a man's vamp size.
- Classic Disney World rides, like Mt. Everest
- Chuck Taylor. No, really. Like, the original shoe dude.

Sure seems like a lot of foot talk, doesn't it? Check it all out at any of the links below or wherever you listen to podcasts.

🍎https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/going-terribly/id1531827350
🐶https://open.spotify.com/show/1bm2PuIKafoXHuuOJSTqIy
🎣https://castbox.fm/channel/id3326895?country=us

17/06/2025

🎤🎧HAPPY TERRIBLE TUESDAY!🎧🎤

Well, Alice is back. But she's still facing some COVID aftershocks. And now Doug has COVID for the very first time.

No, this is episode isn't coming to you straight from mid-2020.

Alice shares tales from Salt Lake City (spoiler: it's a lot of sitting in her hotel room watching movies, like Crazy Rich Asians). And Doug overshares about his unique COVID symptoms.

Still not 2020 though. We promise.

EPISODE 246: TWO LITERARY ROMANTICS IN A JAMES TAYLOR BU****LE

Other discussion topics include:

- Getting all one's medical knowledge from Dick Van Dyke's Diagnosis Murder
- The wittiest Davids
- The time Keanu Reeves had his talent stolen by the Monstars
- Why frogs might be the most exhausted animals
- Messy sheets: P**p or Caesar salad incident?

It's not all gross sickness and p**p stuff though. You'll also learn about the first chocolate chip cookie. So just click on something already.

🍎https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/going-terribly/id1531827350
🐶https://open.spotify.com/show/1bm2PuIKafoXHuuOJSTqIy
🎣https://castbox.fm/channel/id3326895?country=us

**pingMucus

10/06/2025

🎤🎧HAPPY TERRIBLE TUESDAY!🎧🎤

Alice is unfortunately ill this week, but Will.he.is has (figuratively) stepped into her shoes to co-host with Doug this week. They'll discuss a bunch of questions only...ahem, Will can answer, as well as the debut of the game "Meat or Myth."

They cap off the episode with every single delicious and/or weird thing imminently coming to you at restaurants and store shelves with "New Yum City."

EPISODE 245: TWO NERD JUICERS IN A REALLY BIG MIGHTY MEATY PIZZA TREAT

Other discussion topics may include:
- Do men brag about the amount of p*e that comes out of them?
- How Hello Kitty can make anyone interested in wearing makeup
- Testicular bicycle dangers, featuring the Meaty Blues
- Does anyone REALLY like cotton candy?
- The (hopefully) upcoming Blue Mouthed Food Club

It's a lot of food talk, a little bathroom talk, and a touch of period talk. No, really. Listen at any of the links below or wherever you get your podcasts.

🍎https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/going-terribly/id1531827350
🐶https://open.spotify.com/show/1bm2PuIKafoXHuuOJSTqIy
🎣https://castbox.fm/channel/id3326895?country=us

03/06/2025

🎤🎧HAPPY TERRIBLE TUESDAY!🎧🎤

There's a lot of talk about currency and puzzle terminology this episode. But just so you don't think Doug and Alice have completely turned over a new leaf, they absolutely say the word "sausage" more than has ever been said in a non-pork-specific podcast.

So much sausage, y'all. Sweet, savory, spicy, Vienna. It's all covered in this one.

EPISODE 244: TWO PRESBYTERIAN PESCATARIANS IN AN ACTUAL SAUSAGE PARTY

Other discussion topics may include:

- How to properly get into a spread eagle position at the gym. Like a lady.
- Is Def Comedy Jam short for Def Comedy Jamboree?
- Elusive doughnuts
- Remembering the time Tom Hanks defused a bomb and slapped another celebrity, or something.
- Which steamed sausage casing looks the most like a condom?

Come on in and enjoy the sausage party at any of the links below or wherever you listen to podcasts.

🍎https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/going-terribly/id1531827350
🐶https://open.spotify.com/show/1bm2PuIKafoXHuuOJSTqIy
🎣https://castbox.fm/channel/id3326895?country=us

27/05/2025

🎤🎧HAPPY TERRIBLE TUESDAY!🎧🎤

We're all lucky to still have Alice around after her near-death bug trap experience this past week. Luckily a Backstreet Boys-featured musical has been the cure for what ailed her.

EPISODE 243: TWO ANNE HATHAWAYS IN A SUFFOCATING BUG TRAP

Other discussion topics:

- Is it time for another live-action Flintstones movie?
- The possibly true (but likely not) story of the first person to dip fries in a Wendy's Frosty
- How to play a slug like an ocarina
- Paul McCartney vs. The Swede
- Is your deep freeze big enough for your loved one? You know, just in case?

Doug and Alice will also teach you all about the greatest songwriter you haven't heard of (unless you have because you're younger, hipper, and more in touch with pop culture than they are). Check it out at any of the links below or wherever you listen to podcasts.

🍎https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/going-terribly/id1531827350
🐶https://open.spotify.com/show/1bm2PuIKafoXHuuOJSTqIy
🎣https://castbox.fm/channel/id3326895?country=us

20/05/2025

🎤🎧HAPPY TERRIBLE TUESDAY!🎧🎤

The NBA Playoffs have been going on for what seems like forever, and Alice was able to pull herself away from a scrapbooking endeavor to watch her first game. There's also some talk about computer shopping and domestic finance.

Yes, this is adulthood, folks. We all need to get used to it.

EPISODE 242: TWO WRECKING BALL FIREWORKS IN AN UNVISIBLE SCREEN

Other discussion topics may include:
- Dongles
- A basement es**rt
- Cocker
- Taking advantage of a browser's incognito mode
- Yak butter

And exactly zero of those are anything dirty, so looks like you need to grow up, too.

Alice and Doug have also invented a new musical game. You'll want to play this one with your family and friends, and the only way to learn about it is by listening to this week's episode. And the only way to do that is by clicking on any of the links below. Or finding us in any of a thousand other internet places, of course.

🍎https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/going-terribly/id1531827350
🐶https://open.spotify.com/show/1bm2PuIKafoXHuuOJSTqIy
🎣https://castbox.fm/channel/id3326895?country=us

13/05/2025

🎤🎧HAPPY TERRIBLE TUESDAY!🎧🎤

This week's episode sees the long-awaited return of Semi-Recent Semi-Decent News, featuring incredible journalistic integrity, thought provoking stories, and more p**p than you could shake a stick at. Or would want to. Also, Alice got a much deserved promotion, so please congratulate her! Even if Doug will never remember her new job title.

EPISODE 241: TWO INTENTINOAL BED POOPERS IN A CLASSIC PAINTING, BUT BETTER

Other discussion topics may include:
- Terminal degrees: Sad or heartwarming?
- A 98-year old war hero still being a hero
- What are your favorite f words?
- Gas tank chicken nuggets
- S***m racing

Are you team Dum Dum or team Blow Pop? Team p**p race or team s***m race? Team M**h Raccoon or Team Stowaway Child? There are no wrong answers. Listen at any of the links below or wherever you find your podcasts.

🍎https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/going-terribly/id1531827350
🐶https://open.spotify.com/show/1bm2PuIKafoXHuuOJSTqIy
🎣https://castbox.fm/channel/id3326895?country=us

**pRelayRace **hRaccoon ***mRace

06/05/2025

🎤🎧HAPPY TERRIBLE TUESDAY!🎧🎤

This week Doug asks Alice some much anticipated, very important questions. They involve God, rivals, and, of course, bologna sandwiches.
Alice teaches Doug about translucent babies, and he does not take it well.

EPISODE 240: TWO GOD DOGS IN A JACK MACK HEART ATTACK

Other discussion topics may include:

- Has Michael J. Fox ever sung a song?
- Turning retired rats into delicious milk
- The sounds of tortoise s*x
- Eleven is way too many members for an upstart band
- Va**na Havin' Sleep Walkin' Mamas.

Get yourself good and educated with this month's "It Went Terribly," featuring chicken buttholes, at any of the links below, or wherever you listen to podcasts.

🍎https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/going-terribly/id1531827350
🐶https://open.spotify.com/show/1bm2PuIKafoXHuuOJSTqIy
🎣https://castbox.fm/channel/id3326895?country=us

**naMonologues **naShapedMuppets

29/04/2025

One of the neatest multimedia experiences of my life! A screening of Back to the Future with full orchestra accompaniment of Alan Silvestri's iconic score by the Indianapolis Philharmonic Orchestra!

29/04/2025

🎤🎧HAPPY TERRIBLE TUESDAY!🎧🎤

This week Alice and Doug pull up the ol' random topic generator and test their ability to talk about made-up holidays, strange movies, and more. It goes pretty well, except for Alice giving the audience a Star Wars spoiler (no, not that one) and Doug admitting to spraying fake vomit in a church.

EPISODE 239: TWO HILLBILLY EFFIGIES IN A FORBIDDEN LOVE STORY

Other discussion topics may include:
- Which of the 16 Star Wars TV series is your favorite?
- Changing the Jaws score to s**t music
- What food looks disgusting but tastes delicious?
- Swiss Army Man Knife: Big Dan
- Anyone know how to get ahold of Yo Yo Ma for personal appearances?

Check out all the fun at any of the links below or wherever you listen to podcasts.

🍎https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/going-terribly/id1531827350
🐶https://open.spotify.com/show/1bm2PuIKafoXHuuOJSTqIy
🎣https://castbox.fm/channel/id3326895?country=us

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