Going Terribly

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Going Terribly

Your favorite punning linguists, Alice and Doug, talk about dumb stuff. And some smart stuff too. And not all of it is butt stuff. We promise. Mistaken identities.

Available wherever you listen to podcasts. Why is it called Going Terribly? Well, you see, when Alice and Doug get together, it’s always a beautiful disaster. Foodie shenanigans. Crossed wires. Sexy double entendres. You get the picture. And “going” is a euphemism for urination – well wait, urination doesn’t need a euphemism since it’s the technical term. But we can’t say pissing, right? Because i

t’s pubic for all to see. But ALSO: Doug doesn’t curse – yeah did you know Doug doesn’t curse? I didn’t until we started this podcast and holy crap there’s a typo but it’s kinda funny so maybe I’ll keep it because the long Facebook bio can be 10,000 characters max. That’s a f**kton of characters – oh sh*t I just said f**kton – wait, is this Alice right now? Or Doug? They’re like the same person. Two pees in a poodcast. BOOM. Nailed it.

30/09/2025

🎤🎧HAPPY TERRIBLE TUESDAY!🎧🎤

On this week's special 5-year (and one-week and one-day) anniversary edition of Going Terribly, Alice and Doug welcome special guests Nicholas Atlantic City Gonzalez and Wendy "If That Is Your Real Name" Brown to the show for games and shenanigans.

Will Wendy's son ever accept her as a professional wrestling colleague?
Will Nick ever get *ahem* "invited" into an operating room mid-surgery?
Have they both secretly been living in Doug and Alice's attic?

All this and more will be revealed (or at least brought up and quickly dismissed) in this monumental episode.

It's also National Podcast Day, but not a person in the studio was able to name another podcast, so that's a little embarrassing.

EPISODE 261: FOUR DEATH PREDICTING CATS IN AN ULTIMATE DREAM BATHROOM

Other discussion topics may include:
- Ever wanted to have salami with Tony Hawk? There may be one particular day when you can!
- Put sticks up your butt, but make it fashion
- Kindergartens that feature strip club pop-ups
- Guerrilla peeing
- Frank Thunderstorm vs. Greg Tsunami

Play along with "Semi-Recent Semi-Decent News" and celebrate this anniversary with us at any of the below links or wherever you listen to podcasts.

🍎https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/going-terribly/id1531827350
🐶https://open.spotify.com/show/1bm2PuIKafoXHuuOJSTqIy
🎣https://castbox.fm/channel/id3326895?country=us

23/09/2025

🎤🎧HAPPY TERRIBLE TUESDAY!🎧🎤

Merry Christmas!

Wait. That can't be right.

Well, something weird is going down this week. You might as well check in and see what it is.

If you stick around long enough you'll hear some alarming things about Costco, turkey bacon, and f***y packs. Real suburbanite kinda stuff.

Other discussion topics may include:
- Doing an audiobook for the LA Times
- Friendly, mom-replacing artificial intelligence
- Video game peace of mind
- Has anyone with the same first and last name ever *not* been a murderer?
- Having a hot dog half hosed down one's throat

It's Going Terribly: The Anthrax-Free Edition. Available at any of the links below or wherever you like to listen to podcasts.

🍎https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/going-terribly/id1531827350
🐶https://open.spotify.com/show/1bm2PuIKafoXHuuOJSTqIy
🎣https://castbox.fm/channel/id3326895?country=us

18/09/2025

Say it out loud... 😉 It's gotta be intentional, right??

🌺

🎧

16/09/2025

🎤🎧HAPPY TERRIBLE TUESDAY!🎧🎤

This week Doug and Alice spend most of the episode becoming educated in p**ps and adjacent fields, thanks to an old, forgotten birthday gift. When they're not doing that, Doug is finally learning some new music while Alice is wondering if her memory has been partially erased by the FBI.

EPISODE 259: TWO BUSINESS HIPPIES IN A 2019 DESK CALENDAR

Other discussion topics may include:

- Trying to make "going giraffe" happen
- Why you don't want to be attacked by The Green Goblin
- Unassertive cats and the clean beds they leave behind
- New game show idea: "Is This Blood or Is This Red Meat?"
- Intestinal autonomy

Enjoy this very informational and crappy episode of Going (heh) Terribly at any of the links below or wherever you listen to podcasts.

🍎https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/going-terribly/id1531827350
🐶https://open.spotify.com/show/1bm2PuIKafoXHuuOJSTqIy
🎣https://castbox.fm/channel/id3326895?country=us

09/09/2025

🎤🎧HAPPY TERRIBLE TUESDAY!🎧🎤

What happens when you have to record an episode twice due to a technical issue the first time? You end up with a lot of slap happy ridiculousness, including some impromptu "Words with Nerds."

EPISODE 258: TWO SEASONED GENTLEMEN IN A GOOD AMOUNT OF BUTT SUPPORT

Other discussion topics may include:
- Sailor talk: innovative or ignorant?
- Cereal boxes as a regular form of learning
- What is your favorite high school book, and did you ever finish it?
- Ukulele hunts
- How does one grease up one's Kotter?

Come roll some r's, hit some hard g's, and keep your k's in line in this really strange installment of Going Terribly by clicking on any of the links below or finding us wherever you listen to podcasts.

🍎https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/going-terribly/id1531827350
🐶https://open.spotify.com/show/1bm2PuIKafoXHuuOJSTqIy
🎣https://castbox.fm/channel/id3326895?country=us

02/09/2025

🎤🎧HAPPY TERRIBLE TUESDAY!🎧🎤

Highland cows are really having a moment. As are pickles. And if you'd listen to this week's episode you'd think that so are American Girl dolls, p**p knives, and super sexy swans (AND their cloacas).

You know what's not having a moment? Windi the Gas Passer. Want to learn what that is? You've come to the right place.

EPISODE 257: TWO WICKER SNOTTERS IN A LIMITED BATCH OF SWEET AND SAVORY FLAVOR

Other discussion topics may include:
- Who won the war between the Spartans and the Aztecs?
- How to make your furniture smell more like delicious food
- The single greatest idea for pumpkin pie this century
- Avoiding lawsuits from super powerful mythical beings
- Testicular ear buds

Enjoy "Where Were We?," "It Went Terribly," and "New Yum City" in this multi-planned-segment episode (where we still manage to talk about farts and ge****ls at length) by clicking on any of the links below or finding us wherever you listen to podcasts.

🍎https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/going-terribly/id1531827350
🐶https://open.spotify.com/show/1bm2PuIKafoXHuuOJSTqIy
🎣https://castbox.fm/channel/id3326895?country=us

01/09/2025

Happy Ginger Cat Appreciation Day! 🧡🤍🧡🤍🧡🤍

26/08/2025

🎤🎧HAPPY TERRIBLE TUESDAY!🎧🎤

In a world...where zomboodles and sea urchins run the streets, one fishmonger's daughter and her sour cream-fearing paramour do the only thing they know...

Make really juvenile jokes on a weekly podcast.

EPISODE 256: TWO DOUBLE DOSES OF ALICE IN A SOUR CREAM SUNDAE

Other discussion topics may include:
- Do you remember your first chicken marsala?
- How to legally acquire your neighbor's dog
- The dangers of living in a $250 house
- Bad questions to ask at a job interview and why you should just go ahead and ask
- An unfortunate (and very large) elephant visual

Come bust a rug with Alice and Doug at any of the links below or wherever you listen to podcasts.

🍎https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/going-terribly/id1531827350
🐶https://open.spotify.com/show/1bm2PuIKafoXHuuOJSTqIy
🎣https://castbox.fm/channel/id3326895?country=us

19/08/2025

🎤🎧HAPPY TERRIBLE TUESDAY!🎧🎤

This week Doug regales us with origin tales of a couple of sticky substances.

Meanwhile Alice is looking for a dongle wherever she can find it.

And they have the audacity to call someone *else* "Dirty Dan."

EPISODE 255: TWO DOORMAT STEALERS IN A TAMPON HIERARCHY

Other discussion topics may include:
- Relearning how to play a mouth instrument
- A multi-decades long sandpaper obsession
- Period pills: What in the world?
- Frank Lloyd Wright's Andrew Lloyd Weber
- The worst possible thing a swan could do to you

There's also the least impressive Bill Clinton impression you'll ever hear, but it's so doggone weird, maybe you should just go ahead and click on one of these links.

🍎https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/going-terribly/id1531827350
🐶https://open.spotify.com/show/1bm2PuIKafoXHuuOJSTqIy
🎣https://castbox.fm/channel/id3326895?country=us

12/08/2025

🎤🎧HAPPY TERRIBLE TUESDAY!🎧🎤

This week Doug and Alice spend a lot of time chatting about old teen sitcoms involving twins, retired football stars, bands, evil twins, and fantastic(?) theme songs.

They cap off the episode by trying to update an old classic singalong for the modern child.

In between there are yard sales, heartburn, and...long burgers?

EPISODE 254: TWO SURF DUDES WITH ATTITUDE IN A BRIGHT SIDE OFF AMNESIA

Other discussion topics may include:
- When was Sir Mix-a-Lot knighted?
- A bad time at the Golden Corral
- Revealing the long-debated origins of the "Meat Plate"
- Sweet Valley Dysentery
- Why aren't Supernatural fans called "Supernatches"?

Down by the bay
Where the watermelons grow
Back to my home
I dare not go
For if I do
My mother will say
Have you ever heard our show?
Just click a link below
Down by the bay*

🍎https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/going-terribly/id1531827350
🐶https://open.spotify.com/show/1bm2PuIKafoXHuuOJSTqIy
🎣https://castbox.fm/channel/id3326895?country=us

*We know this was lame, but the examples in the episode are a lot better. We promise.

08/08/2025

We picked up this random highland cow basket at a yard sale, and both kitties have been obsessed with it 😂🐮 Highland cows are really having a moment 🤩

05/08/2025

🎤🎧HAPPY TERRIBLE TUESDAY!🎧🎤

It's almost a great day with Doug, as he researched the wrong day to start the episode. Whoops.

Other than that, Alice laments the times of her class/grass conscious youth while Doug experiences his first conscious bout of xenophobia.

It's also "It Went Terribly" week, so they correct some stuff, explain some things, and undoubtedly get everything else wrong.

EPISODE 253: TWO FRENCH LICKERS IN AN APRIL FOOLS THEME PARK

Other discussion topics may include:
- Hello Kitty is not a girl, not yet a kitten
- If not Chuck E. Cheese, where can teens go to play with balls these days?
- George Washington's fake teeth - wooden or just wine stained?
- A regretful amount of fart talk
- Vienna sausage trickery

Come learn stuff! There's no way to know if you'll be learning correct things, but that's all part of the fun, right? Click on any of the links below or find us wherever you listen to podcasts.

🍎https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/going-terribly/id1531827350
🐶https://open.spotify.com/show/1bm2PuIKafoXHuuOJSTqIy
🎣https://castbox.fm/channel/id3326895?country=us

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