The Secret You Hide Holds You Back

26/11/2025

The Letting Go Method gives you a simple, grace-centered way to stay grounded during the holidays:

Spot It · Silence It · Stop It.

Spot It is about recognizing when a hidden memory or old family dynamic starts stirring something inside you.

Thanksgiving can awaken things you haven’t thought about in months.

Maybe a familiar room or voice, or even a familiar expectation.

Then instantly you are triggered and anxiety threatens the "holiday spirit."

Spotting what that secret is isn’t failure.

It’s awareness.

It’s grace giving you space to breathe before the moment takes over.

Awareness is the first step toward experiencing peace in-the-moment.

Live a life that lets go.

15/11/2025

Ever been sitting at the Thanksgiving table and—out of nowhere—you feel 10 years old again?

Everyone’s laughing, the food smells amazing, and on the outside you look fine.
But something—a voice, a glance, a memory—pulls you back to the moment everything changed.

It's happened to me.

In The Secret You Hide Holds You Back, I wrote:

“The problem with secrets is that they don’t stay buried. They resurface at the worst times—pulling you back into the past and threatening to ruin the joy of the present.”

That’s exactly what it feels like.
You’re an adult now, but that old hurt still knows your name.

For years, I called pretending “peace.” But peace built on having to be quiet to appease everyone else never lasts. It’s just pressure, not healing.

That’s why I created The Letting Go Method—a simple way to stay calm and grounded when emotions try to take over.

*Spot It: Notice what’s really being triggered.
*Silence It: Take a breath and remember that was then and this is now. You’ve grown.
*Stop It: Choose peace before the moment decides for you.

Because if you don’t learn to let go, those same memories, those secrets will keep stealing your joy one holiday at a time.

But when you do, grace helps you stay steady, calm, and free to enjoy the moment and the people right in front of you, in spite of the truth you know about them all.

This year, that’s the real victory: sitting at the table and feeling peace, not pressure.

11/11/2025

Ever been at the Thanksgiving table smiling politely while an old wound quietly flares up?
Me too.

It’s funny how just one comment, a memory, or even an aroma can stir up something you thought was long gone.

For years, I’d hold my breath and call that peace, but it was more like pressure, not an occasion for joy.

Here’s what I wrote in The Secret You Hide Holds You Back:
“Hiding secrets feels like carrying a heavy load. It’s constant worry and the stress of guarding your words. It’s a weight that holds down your truth.”

That’s why I created The Letting Go Method. It’s built around three simple steps that help you stay grounded, even when family emotions rise.

Spot It: Notice what’s really being triggered. What was the pain from the past?

Silence It: Quiet the secret shame and lies by bringing yourself back to the present. Breathe and remember you’ve changed. Believe what is true of you now.

Stop It: Let go of those upsetting thoughts and resume control of your emotions.

That’s not to say the issue should never be addressed.
But for this occasion, you can choose, on your terms, to let everyone enjoy the holiday without disruption and let go with confidence.

Say to your instigator or to your memories, “Not this year. Not this holiday.”

If you don’t learn to let go, the secret will keep replaying, year after year, at the same table, with the same pain.

You honored your growth. You stayed steady and that’s a win worth celebrating.

Buy The Secret You Hide Holds You Back: How Letting Go Sweetens Life & Makes You Free.
It’s available now on Amazon.

Come join the growing community on my book page, The Secret You Hide Holds You Back.

It’s all about living a life that lets go.

11/11/2025

Veterans hide secrets, too.
So grateful for your service.

09/11/2025

If you’re not ready to post publicly, take five minutes tonight to write this sentence in your journal:

“One thing I’ve been afraid to tell the truth about is…”
You don’t have to share it, but even writing it begins the healing

31/10/2025

What Happens When We Stop Hiding.

Subscribe on Substack.

Gentle reflections on grace, truth, and the freedom to live unhidden.

15/10/2025

14/10/2025

he best laid plans. What can I say?
Amazon says the font size on the spine is not small enough.
Now, another 72 hours for review..
Ahhhhh!!!!!

It’s time again for me to taste my own “The Letting Go Method.”
SPOT the secret.
SILENCE the lie it speaks about me.
STOP the mental and emotional spiral.

SPOT IT:
In the past, if I did not meet a deadline, I'd punish myself with destructive, perfectionistic thoughts. And, oh the embarrassment.
The words, “You’ve tried to get this book out for 3 years. You’d think by now you'd have it all together," just keep repeating in my head.
And yes, Imposter Syndrome is trying to get me. too.
I feel it in my stomach.

Here we go with "The Letting Go Method:"
SILENCE IT:
What happened in the past is NOT happening now. Self-publishing is no joke. Oh, the tedious details. I’ve heard others have also dealt with formatting issues and they were still successful. I’m a different person now.

STOP IT:
I choose faith and I choose to extend grace to myself. I haven’t walked this journey alone. Okay, so it might take a couple more days. In the big scheme of things, that’s minor.

I pray those who have encouraged me and especially those who have preordered my book will understand.

I am still an accomplished writer and now an author. “The Secret You Hide Holds You Back: How Letting Go Sweetens Life & Makes You Free” will grace the pages of Amazon and soon after, Barnes & Noble and other bookstores, libraries, and schools.

No mental and emotional spiral this time.
I’ve learned to let go.