Let's not mention your father's mental illness

12/01/2025

Why can I post on my own fu***ng page Facebook ?????

20/12/2024

What I thought was the strongest love I'd ever felt, was actually just trauma bonding. Instead of heading to the light, it quickly led me to a suffocating wasteland filled with all my deepest fears.
It was a very scary place to claw my way back from.

No, it's not.

10/12/2024

This page has helped me. If you've ever had these feelings this might be a handy page for you to follow.

I saw it all, the day after I left.
I saw my family, my friends, bereft.
I saw their pain, confusion, their shock.
I realised my demons had run amok.

Of course I mattered, of course I was loved,
of course I was not better off above.
Because being above, means seeing it all.
And now I know that my life wasn’t small.

My life was precious, I gave it away,
I listened to darkness, it showed me the way.
But now, from here, I see it anew.
If only I’d stayed and pushed on through.

But here I am, looking down from afar,
watching the pain, a lifelong scar.
I’ll never be gone from the hearts that I touched,
If only I’d seen, I was always enough.

Donna Ashworth
From ‘I wish i knew’

ART BY Lisa Aisato


👌🪢🐝🐝👌








IT'S👌🪢🐝🐝👌
💚

09/12/2024

It's good to feel a new sense of existence and appreciation for life after facing some tough demons this year. It's been a long soul search that really got into top gear about 18 months ago when i went down the rabbit hole of mental health research to try to solve the riddle that is me.
It was quite a shock at first when I recently realized that I'm Autistic.
Yeah.
It may have already been obvious to you but I was oblivious to it.
Or you might think "No that's just not right" probably because I'm pretty good at masking which is pretending to be normal.
There is just no question in my mind after all the research I have done now.
It has answered so many questions.
And all of a sudden so many things started making sense.
So many things. Oh man what a realisation! It's sort of relieving but incredibly sad at the same time.
There is a grieving process that comes with the realisation of the fact that so many of my life's torments and struggles could have been easier, (or maybe not happened at all) had I known 40 years ago what i know now! But sadly it wasn't meant to be that way, and it is like this for a lot of people my age coming lto terms with similar realizations later in life.
But anyway here i am, alive, in a brave new world of self-acceptance and realization and learning to understand myself in a way like never before.
And learning to forgive myself for being a strange weirdo that I am.

09/12/2024

When your passionate person you feel like this about a lot of things

𝐁𝐥𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐒𝐨𝐮𝐥

**Warning!

The last time I posted this I had a few seriously negative comments.

Of course everyone can interpret my writing in whatever way suites them and I am always completely open to constructive criticism.

𝐁𝐔𝐓.....

This was written in a loving and 𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐚𝐩𝐡𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 way. 𝐍𝐎𝐓 a violent, abusive, masochistic, hurtful, or negative way. I can understand how it could be interpreted that way though, but again… never my intention. Just throwing that out there now. As always, thank you for reading.

09/12/2024

There is some very good Information on this page

What does it mean to say, “Healing developmental trauma does not make an autistic person more typical”?

If I do trauma therapy while living in an environment that is unsupportive of my autistic body’s needs, I may experience trauma. (This applies to any type of trauma therapy, including nonverbal treatments.)

It is important for us to reduce the symptoms of autistic trauma, but if we try to do that in a space where connection and acceptance is systematically denied from us, we will have an intensely painful experience of rejection.

Being denied connection because of our differences is a core trauma wound for most autistics. For many autistic people, our trauma blocks are protecting us from this pain we have experienced so many times before.

When we remove the protection of our trauma blocks, we must have appropriate support. Appropriate support for an autistic person requires an identity affirming approach as well as accommodations and support for disabilities.

If trauma interventions are offered to autistic people from within the medical/pathology/cure model, we are simply setting autistic people up for re-traumatization, fragmentation, and increased mental health problems.

Living on the right side of this list is not sustainable long-term for any autistic person. The symptoms of autistic trauma are a significant threat to autistic health and survival…. When autistic people seek help with trauma symptoms, it is important for care providers to know that healthy autistic people can have significant support needs. A reduction in trauma symptoms does not mean a person will become more independent.

This reality is scary for many of us because society measures our worth by our independence. Since that isn’t going to change tomorrow, we need refuge spaces where we can interact with other neurodivergent people and experience acceptance are essential for trauma recovery. We also need non-autistic people to help us advocate for better social supports and policies that meet us where we are.
For more explanation of this image, check out the longer blog post here: https://www.traumageek.com/blog/autistic-traits-and-trauma

The Neurodiversity + Trauma study group is a collaborative community learning experience where we get to talk about this type of topic and more!
Details here: https://traumageek.thinkific.com/courses/neurodiversity-and-trauma-study-group-3

04/12/2024

The painful truth about trauma

03/12/2024

Music addiction is one coping mechanism that I'm very happy to have!